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  1. 13 points
    Hi everyone. I just came across one of those fear articles that we see too often that can trigger those of us with HA. I found this author's email address and sent this email to her today. If she responds I'll share it, but I'm sure none of us will be holding our breath: Hello Alyssa; You might not be aware of this, but you are amongst a growing number of what I call “health scaremongers” online today. One of your photo slide articles was just featured on MSN about cancer symptoms that men often ignore. I could pick it apart one by one but let me just give you one example; brain tumors. Persistent headaches, watch out, could be a brain tumor! The reality of the situation is that, according to renown neurologists from the most prestigious of universities, it is highly, highly unlikely that a headache will be the first symptom one gets when suffering from a BT. Briefly, here is the reason. The brain feels no pain. When a tumor grows large enough to impact the skull/nerves adjacent to the skull, that is when pain will be felt. However, by the time a tumor has grown to the point where it can cause such pain it has undoubtedly caused havoc during its growth, resulting in other symptoms first, such as seizures, vision loss, and a host of other presenting symptoms. Your article equates persistent non-migraine headaches as potentially being a BT. In fact, between migraine and daily tension headache, you account for the vast majority of causes. Then, there are numerous other headache types, such as ice pick, cluster and many others that occur. Articles like yours scare people. They cause vulnerable people to march to their doctors demanding scans, some with damaging radiation involved. I guess that’s your aim; it generates more “clicks” and hence more advertising revenue. But at what human cost? If you’re going to write about health issues, write intelligent well thought out articles that show you researched and were serious about your work and not just out to grab the last buck for your employer. Bob - Canada
  2. 11 points
    In 2014 my father passed away, a couple months shy of his 98th birthday. Other than the final few years, he was alert, happy, always joking and sharing his so called wisdoms. Even in the last years, most of the time he just suffered from normal memory issues. So, what helped him make it well into his 90's? It sure wasn't his genes. His father died at age 46 and his mother at 60. For a good part of his life he was slightly overweight; not obese but say 10-20 pounds above his norm for height. He had an awful 1st marriage; his wife actually lied to the War Department in 1944 saying he was not supporting his kids. It worked and they drafted him. He served in Okinawa just before the end of the war in the Pacific. He did have, for a while, strained relations with his kids from that marriage. Lots of stress. Oh, and he worked in a chemical plant knee deep in God knows what concoction of crap, until he was drafted. So, why was he a happy guy who lived a long healthy life? One word more than anything summed it up: positivity in life and in himself. After returning from overseas, he seemed to adopt a new outlook. Shortly afterwards he got a low level position with the Veterans Administration. 30 years later he retired as a GS 15, the highest grade in government not appointed by the President. He met and married my mom. Theirs was a true love story. His attitude towards health was simple. He went to the doctor for his regular checkups, but otherwise you had to drag him to go to a doctor. He had 2 health events in his life; an enlarged prostate that got to where he couldn't urinate. He had surgery and that was that (his next room over neighbor was Ted Knight of Mary Tyler Moore fame). Then at age 82 he had a heart attack. The doctor told me it was a bad one and he'd likely live another 5-7 years. I have no idea what he told my dad, but he wasnt phased by his heart attack. He thrived in rehab, and in months was back to doing everything as before. He lasted another 15+ years. He was told in his late 80's to have his carotid Artery cleaned out. He refused. It never mattered. So what does this all add up to? Well, for him it seems being positive, being a jokester, being content with his life did the trick for him. It's true he didn't smoke cigarettes or abuse booze, but he did love his cigars. Me? I'm 180 degrees opposite of him when it comes to being content, being positive and happy. That makes me really sad. He had personality quirks, and we didn't always have the best relationship, but his attitude towards life was one thing he did right. That's one way I'm still trying to emulate him, and I'll keep trying to the end. Maybe I'll succeed one day. Thanks for reading this long post. We all want to live a long healthy life. He had the recipe and played it out to perfection. Are any of us willing to try to change our outlook on life like he did?
  3. 7 points
    Why is it in anxiety that so many have it over and over and never seem to resolve why. They try all sorts of remedies and take all sorts of actions and get some respite but back it comes. This is not always the case obviously. Some do recover completely and seem to have few setbacks, but so many don't. In fact the vast majority don't. Anxiety, or a neurosis, because that is the technical term for it, is always the result of inner conflict. It has to be. The outer manifestations, GAD, OCD, PTSD are all the result of an unresolved inner conflict. This may not be conscious, in fact it's usually unconscious, but either way it needs resolution for inner peace. Inner peace is the lack of conflict. When you are at peace with yourself, (what a wonderful thought!), then you are at peace with the world. The inner manifestation is reflected in the outer. You care more; are no longer self centred. This is why talking things out through counselling or therapy is so important. There may be hidden reasons for the anxiety that can be easily resolved by seeing them in a different light, from someone who can be objective; who is not caught up in the emotional turmoil. Prescribed drugs suppress the feelings, but perhaps in doing so we lose the lesson that the pain may be teaching us. 'Hey there, there's something wrong in your life, let's put it right'. The surface pain is what it is. A warning that something is wrong; unresolved. Unless this is dealt with we become in danger of 'getting used to' how we feel. Of accepting that we may always be like this and that medication is the only way to obtain relief. If your anxiety keeps recurring ask yourself if there is a deeper underlying problem that you may have overlooked or felt was not important. Anxiety never stands alone. It has to have support from fear and the source of that fear needs to be investigated. I appreciate the difficulties in getting the sort of help I suggest. But if you are ready for it it is often surprising how it appears. Jon.
  4. 6 points
    Hi all. I went to my second therapy session today. Wow love my therapist. I wish I could take her home with me lol.. how nice would that be. But anyway she had me fill out a few questions/tests today.. one was rating where I'm at with anxiety and an entire page was anxiety symptoms.. ex: do you have chest pains, chest tightness, lump in throat, jelly legs, muscle fatigue/weakness, diarrhea, constipation, nausea, dizziness, light headed I wish that I had seen that sheet back in Feb when I had jelly legs, weak and fatigue muscles.. Bec I thought ALS not anxiety!!!!! Wow y'all.. I know we see it here there is a list on the forum but actually seeing it today as part of a test by a Dr it made me realize anxiety symptoms are really real!!! I hope this post brings some comfort to people that have some of these symptoms and have a hard time seeing it for what they really are.... anxiety ❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️
  5. 6 points
    I ran across this on Pinterest and it hit me like a ton of bricks. It sums up HA so well We drink the poison Our minds pour For us And wonder Why we feel sick -Atticus. So so so true. Can't believe everything our minds tell us.
  6. 5 points
    What about: Mongolian Swamp Fever. Mississippi lurgy. New York Acne. Trumpitis! Brexit phobia. (Found in the UK only. Very nasty.(Can drive you mad if not treated!). Inflammation of the wallet. (I get this badly!). Not making enough money. (moneyitis). Inflammation of the workplace. Miserable sods disorder.( MSD. People that make you miserable) Weatherphobia. Asking too many questions disorder. (ATMQD. Nasty complaint!). Temperitis. (Losing your temper unnecessarily). And so on. I'm sure you could find some more fictitious ones. That's what most of our problems are, fictitious!!!!!!
  7. 5 points
    I Just wanted to give everyone an update on how things are going. Sorry this is long, but if you give this a chance and read it through, I think this will help a lot of people with some things I learned along the way. So after almost 3 months of random symptoms, I'm finally on the mending path from this wicked bout of health anxiety. I had my MRI last Thursday of full Brain and Spine and the results came back exceptionally normal. Here is the list of things I've learned through this process that may help some other people out. 1. Symptoms feel real and it's normal to be afraid, but don't get too invested and pay attention to the likeliness of what your fearing actually happening. Sometimes just by thinking about something we assume that it's more likely to happen because we're thinking about it. This is called Thought-Action-Fusion. It's the same reason why when we imagine what we could do with millions of dollars we go out and buy a lottery ticket, but our chances of winning are no greater than if we never had that thought at all. It takes an incredible amount of stress and mental power to create and amplify symptoms, and an even greater power to stop them. Through the last month, I've had: pins/needles/numbness in my hands and feet, sore lower legs, dizziness, vertigo, trouble concentrating, night sweats, extremely dry mouth, palpitations, hyperventilating and not even realizing it. Sore muscles, feeling like I have pinched nerves, cold feet and hands, sucky memory, twitches, jerks before falling asleep, random tingles, burning skin, insomnia and weight loss. Now I'm just left with a bit of numbness in my hands (worse on the right) and my legs are sore but significantly better. (Tongue gets a little sore when my mouth is dry at night too, but that's pretty normal in winter dryness). I went from a lot of symptoms to very few in a short time by simply not thinking about them anymore. It is actually shocking how powerful the mind can be. 2. Listen to your doctors. They've perfected their crafts through rigorous studies and practical application. They know what to look for, and they wouldn't let anyone go through something terrible if they truly thought anything was wrong. When I was in my spiral, I wouldn't believe a word that anyone told me. I was so convinced that I was dying, I was the most bull-headed human being on the planet, and my anxiety monster wasn't letting anyone tell me any different. Now that I'm on the other side of this Tornado, I just feel like an ass. I let myself get to a place where rational thoughts and actions were simply broken, and going forward through therapy and CBT I'm not letting myself get back to that place. I actually have a follow up appointment with my doctor tomorrow and I plan on apologizing because he was right 2 and half months ago. 3. Seek reassurance, but know when to quit. When you are asking questions about what you're going through, remember that typically people who have been through similar experiences are quite honest. If someone is telling you that your fine, and 20 more people also tell you that you are fine, you are probably fine. There's no bets taking place around who can keep you from seeking proper medical care the longest. People have just been there and don't want you to spiral down as hard as they did when they might not have had the same reassurance resources. 4. Seek professional mental health resources. When your doctors, friends (or group of people in a forum) tell you that your anxiety is getting the best of you, don't wait while your having physical tests to start the help seeking process. Do it in parallel, it's never too early to start seeing someone who can help you with what you're going through on an emotional and mindful level, regardless of the situation. It's a big factor in feeling better. 5. When it comes to health anxiety just pretend that Google doesn't exist. Feeling better? Want to get sucked in to a black hole and repeat the same process you just fought tooth and nail to get out of? Just type in your newest symptom into that oh so familiar search bar and watch as your mental health is thrusted into a blender and set to purify. Unless you're having a heart attack, try out the three week rule. If something is bugging you, give it three weeks, and then go to the doctors. Don't ever Google a symptom ever. PERIOD. Like I said, sorry for the length of this post. But I learned quite a bit in this particular battle with HA (worst it's ever been since I was diagnosed with anxiety over 10 years ago). Hopefully you will use some of the advice above and remember that you are never alone. -Matt
  8. 5 points
    You have dropped into the old anxiety cycle. As soon as one symptom is explained, another crops up. This happens to so many anxiety sufferers. It's because of the mindset you're in. It's introspective, it's analytical and it's source is planted in fearful anticipation. As soon as you feel a new symptom, anxiety launches and jumps on it, the first thought is a catastrophised statement, the worst case scenario which a negative mindset instantly creates a belief of. The searching for answers then starts. It runs like clockwork. The thinking errors occur around the reaction to the symptom and the self diagnostics you give yourself. You then need this belief to be disproved by someone but if you look back to the beginning, nothing has been diagnosed, you create your own traction based on a normal everyday sensation. The pain in your inner thigh will certainly be a tweaked muscle but your mind has diagnosed cancer (that's the usual conclusion) You need to work on the initial reaction to the symptom as thats where this all stems from.
  9. 5 points
    I'm sorry but there is no need to be condescending. This is a place to help ease one another's fears not to make someone who is obviously dealing with something feel like they're crazy or acting in a stupid way. Not to put words in anyone's mouth but by saying "of course I've been reading stories" I don't think she's actively trying to make herself upset. Anyone with health anxiety knows how it can affect your mind/body/actions. Sometimes by googling symptoms we're hoping against all hope that we find something on there that will in fact ease our minds. In fact, it was because I was googling my symptoms that I found this website and I couldn't be happier that I did. If you don't suffer with HA than I know you couldn't possibly know how our minds work but please when leaving comments to people take into consideration what they might already be going through. They don't need to read negative comments towards them when they're only feeling scared.
  10. 5 points
    Most of the time when we post, we are struggling with anxiety. Today I wanted to post when I am not in the midst of it, to describe it and more importantly describe what led up to feeling better. Like sleep, it just happens,. Anxiety just ends on its own. This sounds silly right. How can it just end on its own? Well, the fact is when anxiety ends it always happens just that way, on its own, with no involvement from me. In fact the lack of involvement is the key to it. When we just step back and allow it to end, it just does. The opposite of trying to make something happen is to be stoic, to just let things happen and ignore it for a period of time. It begins with reducing worry. Worry is so bad, when we worry about something, we are engaged in an activity that hurts rather than helps. To stop worrying about how I feel, to stop reacting to it, is what we call acceptance. This involves actions in the present. We engage in the hear and now. Our mind is not lost in the past with regret or obsessed with the future with worry. It is dealing with what is happening right now. It is not regretting or worrying, focusing on the very instant of time we are living pushes out regrets and worry and is calming. For example, let's say I am stuck in my car in a traffic jam. What am I thinking about. Am I just listening to music, focusing on the moment, chilling out, or am I lost in worry. Worried I am trapped. What if something happens, worried about being late. Worried about getting sick in a public space. Worried about losing control,. It's all worry worry worry. This example pertains to many other things, if I feel dizzy, I worry do I have a disease , is going to get worse. what's next, what's next, worry worry worry. If am unconcerned with what is next, I am calmer. When I am calmer I sleep better, and live better. I enjoy the day, the sunshine,the air I breathe, the work I do. Calmness is the absence of worry, it is acceptance of my circumstances, it is not fighting it, not trying to change it. Change is always a proactive exercise . It is not reactive to my circumstances, reactive actions are anxious actions and are the result of worrying. Anxiety ends when I cease to worry. But I do not try to not worry. It has to just happen. Negative thoughts are simply replaced but positive ones. The fear that is worry is a reaction. The lack of this second fear eliminates the first trigger entirely. It simply goes away on its own. Acceptance is the absence of reacting . It is the elimination of worry. The way it works is that the sensization goes away. The nerves calm down, the internal mind impulsive that trigger physical sensations calm down,. The cycle breaks, and life calms down and all is good. This is how anxiety ends. I wanted to write during a good period to describe how this happened to remember it and share it, to show the way. The way is the absence of trying to step off the thread mill and let the calmness happen on its own, because trying and trying is the same as worrying and worrying, it is feeding the very thing that triggered it, it is keeping it alive. when it ends. And yes it does end. It is because I have ceased to try to make it end, and thus allowed,it to end.
  11. 5 points
    I've been here before but I thought I would come back and see how much mayhem I have caused and what attempts you are making to get rid of me. You have a fight on your hands and I don't give up easily. I know I have problems too. I am a liar, a trickster and a fraud but I can't help it. In fact I rather enjoy making people suffer; it gives me a boost. I notice there are some silly articles on here about control, acceptance and such nonsense. Now this worries me a bit because if sufferers stop trying to control me I suffer. It is the fact that as they attempt to get rid of me by fighting and struggling that gives me more power. If they accept me it derives me of my drug, adrenaline, which keeps me going. I get severe withdrawal symptoms if I don't get enough. Another thing that worries me is that a lot of you seem to be doing well and diminishing my power over you. By getting together and swapping tales about me, (which are not true of course), you increase the knowledge of what I am and that is not good for me. I like to work in the dark and the less you know about me the better. Ignorance is my best friend and we work well together. Our arch enemy, Understanding, keeps popping up now and the and we do our best to counter his nonsenses but some of you still listen to him which is a pity from my point of view. My advice to you is to give up trying to get rid of me; go on fighting and struggling and trying to control me. Boy, you should feel the power I get from such action. I have another good friend, Ignorance. He has a son, Lackofunderstanding and we are training him along so that he can cause some real problems in the future. We have a club. The founder members are myself as Chairman, Panic, Fear, Dread, Ignorance and despair. We get along fine together and have regular meetings to see what further chaos we can cause. So my advice is this. Go on struggling and fighting. Don't get any medication and for goodness sake never seek medical help. In fact never seek help at all. It hurts us deeply when that rogue CBT appears on the scene. Nasty piece of work. Does so many people so much good he is a real menace. I am sure you would not want any of my committee members to suffer so keep up the good work and keep fighting. All the best. Anxiety.
  12. 4 points
    Thanks @Iugrad91 Als worries are hard to break. The ALS forum is toxic. I promise. You think it will help but it hurts. You really have to stop going there. If the people on the ALS forum says no and to go away.. listen!!!!!!!!!!! They know what they are talking about. You have zero symptoms. I had a sweet yet firm man on the ALS forum tell me he wished Google wouldn't put twitching as a listed symptom he said it should be paralysis only. You have to get your mind on something else. It's hard but that's how I recovered. My husband actually took WiFi off my phone so I couldn't Google and boy did that help! I read books I enjoyed to keep my mind busy and I walked twice a day and rode bikes to keep my mind clear. Try a week cleanse from Google. Hugs. This worry will ease. But you have to work at it.
  13. 4 points
    Hello everyone, just came back from my pcp appointment and let me tell y’all. Note: IVE BEEN FEELING ALOT BETTER ON MY OWN THINKING RATIONALLY, TRUST ME IVE BEEN THERE WHERE I FELT LIKE I COULDNT USE MY HANDS, LEGS. FELT LIKE I COULDNT WALK OR DRIVE, EVEN TEXT. LOST ALMOST 20 POUNDS DUE TO THIS HA. IVE ONLY GOTTEN 30 HOURS OF SLEEP IN A MONTH, SEEN MULTIPLE DOCTORS. I WAS 140, NOW IM 160 I FEEL LIKE I OVER SLEEP NOW HAHA AND ITS GETTING BETTER EVERYDAY. She was getting mad at me because I wasn’t focusing on the things I need to focus on haha. (I go to a university hospital and If you read my past post I’ve seen a lot of pcp just wasn’t mine cause she was on medical leave but she knows about my information since it was noted” Well to sum it up, she knows that I’ve been going through many ALS fear for some months now and she knows about my fasciculation's in my left calve (my hotspot) and all over. she said, “you don’t have ALS, we don’t look for twitching in ALS, we look for real clinical weakness.” She also said “you’re 25 years old, your muscles are probably telling you... hey I need to move.” I told her I haven’t been exercising or anything at all just labor work. She also explained, if you’re working out and you can barely curl a 5 pound weight come see me. She then asked me if I wanted to see a neurologist and I was kinda caught off guard, I told her “I do but I feel like I’ll be feeding into my anxiety. You don’t think i have ALS right?” She looked at me like I was crazy cause she just explained everything about ALS to me haha she said “NO.” she said “well I’m going to put the referral in and it takes months to see one anyways so if you feel like you don’t need to then don’t.” its funny because the doctor was telling me I should be worried more about diabetes and heart diseases because of my family. My parents also see my pcp so she’s very familiar with my family and she knows that diabetes runs in my family. So now she wants me to eat more healthier and work out more. i actually have an appointment with a neurologist on Monday cause someone canceled, I was kinda happy. so next Monday I have an appointment with a neurologist and I’ll keep y’all updated but just wanted to share my follow up.
  14. 4 points
    Stop liking online period. Let the doctors, who know what to look for, handle that. It will only make you stay in the anxiety spiral which will make your symptoms worse.
  15. 4 points
    You Google, saying "what's the other alternative"? How about seeing your doctor? Let her/him hear all of your ailments and let them decide if any tests are necessary. Then, put your trust in your doctor's acumen, medical experience and knowledge and choose to accept what you are toid, not what a money-driven advertising based computer scheme spurts out as your problems. Dr. Google never met you as he/it doesn't exist. It's a computer program. Your doctor knows you as a person and you need to build a relationship with that doctor and trust them.
  16. 4 points
    So to sum it up, this week I’ve survived...breast cancer, oral cancer, 2 blood clots, and currently am in the middle of a brain aneurysm. I’m one tough cookie.
  17. 4 points
    I wonder if we realise how much we value the body and pay little attention to the Mind? When we are sick it's the Mind that's sick which is projected onto the body. Oh YEAH!! I hear you say! OK, so it's very controversial, but if you have the patience to listen on, well, who knows! All the world and all the institutions in regard to health are related to bodies. In the UK we have the NHS which is all about bodies. In the USA you have people making millions of dollars out of sick bodies. Right? Let me ask you a question. How much time effort and money is poured into the Mind? In the UK we have to fight to get the barest minimum of money from the government for mental health, when so much physical sickness could be avoided should more was put in. On this site you find that the majority of people complain of bodily symptoms. OK, so it happens and that fine, because that's what we are here for; to help each other, compare notes and, where at all possible, to give comfort and reassurance. You guys all do that and bless you for it. But maybe a different approach is needed. The realisation that what we think and believe in becomes our reality. We create 'idols' to worship. Yes, our bodies we do indeed worship or why would we pay them so much attention? If you idolise something you place great reliance on it. Religion in the orthodox sense is such a reliance. People kill in the name of their religion. They believe in it as much as we believe in ill health. Now OK, you may say, so what do I do about that? You begin by realising the problem does not lie in the body but the Mind. So you need to retrain the mind. Therefore, the physical ailments that are associated with the body begin in the Mind. The very realisation of that fact can help. SOME self help books and SOME therapies can help here, but caution is needed because many of the authors have no idea what anxiety is and talk from theory alone. Meditation can help but many find it difficult. An untrained mind will go off in all directions. The Buddhists say it's like a 'mad monkey, swinging from branch to branch, sampling the fruits but abiding nowhere'. The 'monkey' has to be calmed down and taught how to behave. Now what is it that is going to do all this? You? But you are in an anxiety state so how can you? 'The blind leading the blind' comes to mind. But fortunately we all have a Higher Mind, a force way beyond any understanding, but which can be harnessed to bring us good because that is its purpose. When you say, OK, I will sort out my mind, it's what is doing it. Something beyond your normal thought levels. We have all surely felt that something is there to give relief if only we could find it. That 'something is your real self, buried beneath layers of wrong and negative thinking. It's like a blazing light in an attic covered by all the rubbish thrown up there over the years. We need to remove the rubbish and let the light shine because it never went out. The Higher Self; the real YOU is hardly ever given a chance to express itself because we block the way with negativity and our total attachment to our body. The next time you panic or have symptoms sit down take deep breaths and think about it. Give it some thought and try and allow reason to enter, because reason is a message from your Higher Mind. Your primitive mind is telling you that you are ill. Your Higher mind refutes that suggestion and tells you you are not. It's your choice who you believe.
  18. 4 points
    I've got you all beat. About 15 years ago, I got my first cell phone. I was driving home one night and started hearing this brief, odd beeping sound. I'd never heard such an odd sound. It sounded like it was coming from inside my car but I wasn't certain. A search of my car found nothing. i started to panic. After all, I read on Google that people with brain tumors (acoustic neuromas) have reported hearing sounds that aren't really there. I drove the rest of the way home in a panic. I seriously thought of going to the ER asking for a scan. Got home, told my wife. After she stopped laughing, we went to my car. She found my cell phone in between the crease of the seat. The battery was low and the sound was telling me that. she still mentions tat just to needle me every so often
  19. 4 points
    To give you another example, I have grabbed my mug of tea/coffee before in a hurry. Because I did not grab it properly/at a weird angle, I felt compelled to put it down, feeling like it was going to drop. You can be sure that, at the time, it caused me great clammy, light-headed panic However, had no subsequent problems picking up the mug, and if I look at it logically, it had happened many times in the past when I did not grip it properly. When you are in ALS anxiety, everything, all the minute things, are analyzed and interpreted as a possible ALS symptom. The only way to break the cycle is to let it go gently and focus your attention elsewhere. My neurologist told me to stop strength testing and being on the lookout for ALS symptoms. She said ALS patients don't need to go looking for them; they are wacked over the head when they cannot do a basic daily activity that they could do before. Translated to your hypothetical: I would only be worried if you could not pick up the stack of papers , and find yourself repeatedly unable to do so (and that is ASSUMING that it is really a reasonable amount of papers to pick up, and not some type of ridiculous strength exercise devised by an anxiety sufferer ).
  20. 4 points
    Cowboy, cut out the coffee if you can, there is a direct link between caffeine and heart rate as it's a stimulant. You have a belief that your heart will not be able to cope with exercise, anxiety has placed this belief on you. I had the same belief last year, i wouldn't do much for fear of it causing heart issues. During my therapy, i learnt how misconceptions turn into beliefs. You think that exercise is bad for the heart. This is a misconception, the heart NEEDS exercise yet that belief you now have is your safeplace.. "if i don't do anything, it won't beat harder and i will be ok". This is a belief trap and is entirely erroneous. When i came to this conclusion via the help of a therapist, i was told to get up, get outside and go for a walk and test this belief.. lets see how much truth is really in it. I walked and i walked and my heart rate raised......but i'm still here, the belief was nonsense, just a fearful response to possibility. I would suggest getting up one morning Cowboy and go to the gym! Why let a false belief dictate what you do?
  21. 4 points
    Just wanted to hop in and say what an incredible thread this is. Lots of beautiful, honest emotion, communicated in such an intelligent and caring manner. Hugs to all.
  22. 4 points
    Every intrusive thought it ' the worst'. We think this is 'stronger than before' so that makes us think something really IS going on this time, even though it never did before. I also think the more time we get away from intrusive thoughts the more they seem stronger when they come up becuase we haven't had them in so long. Imagine being somewhere it never rains and when it does , it seems like a LOT of rain because it has not rained in a year. That doesn't mean it's more rain than anywhere else on earth but it only ' FEELS" that way to the person who hasn't seen rain in a long while.
  23. 4 points
    Hi Camilla Your therapist was dead wrong in saying stop seeking reassurance or relying on others. I really questions his or her qualifications but that is besides the point. Your hubby is the one you should be able to seek reassurance and support from. I have had my health anxieties in the past and thankfully the hubby would be able to comfort me . When I was younger I suffered greatly with health anxiety. I was not married at the time but I relied a lot on my friends and my family doctor. Never once did she come hard on me. She always took my concerns seriously. Yes you are going through a setback but you will get through this. Have you tried to relax yourself on a regular basis. Maybe once you are calmer you can start to challenge your thoughts by writing them and asking yourself what is the evidence I have c****r? Keep writing them out if you have too and counter them till it gets ingrained in your brain. Go back to your doctor and if he is a good doctor than he will hear you out otherwise find a more sympathetic one. You have kids just like I do all the more reason to say I will get through this. I will be happy and anxiety free for them one day ...BELIEVE in yourself. Lastly you are not a failure !!! I have had many setbacks lost track... I am still in one piece for the most part Take it one day at a time ... You can do this and you can see so many here care. So keep coming back if you have too whatever you feel will help you get through this. I read your post and felt I had to respond. Take care and ((hugs)) amber
  24. 4 points
    Not at all Amber. I know Mark feels as I do, that the suffering has to have some purpose painful as it is. If that purpose is to help someone over a problem then OK. This is a fantastic site. I have experience of many others and this is the tops. So many are badly managed and allow all sorts of nonsense to be posted. It's good to see the Mods on here keep an eye on things. It struck me when going to the other anxiety sites that more harm was being done than good. So many got upset by what others had said. I don't remember one incident like that here. Well, not on the Forum anyway. So folks, give yourselves a pat on the back, and a personal thanks to you all for helping me at times too. Jon.
  25. 4 points
    hi there i agree with JJ and Mark, last year my specialist said i should go on a cholestrol pill since my mother died at the young age of 47 from a massive heart attack, but there were underlying issues that trigged that... " the dumb specialist" said don't you want to see your kids grow up".... that one thought set me off into a tailspin... and i kept obessessing about it. he has been after me to take it for the last 2 years and i refuse to take it because i have been checked out my GP and she said my cholestrol is fine... sometimes I feel these doctors just want to make more money by writing a prescription and than feeding your body with unecessary drugs. maybe more doctors need to be also trained how to be show more compassion to their patients and this doctor knew i was taking anxiety meds !!! just my 2 cents
  26. 4 points
    Hi. Siobhin. One doctor gives you a pill and the other tells you it will make it worse. No wonder you are confused and frustrated! There is no doubt that anxiety can make a migraine worse. I suggest you tackle the anxiety. If you do the migraines will rectify themselves. You know the procedure. Acceptance. Now not only migraine can make you dizzy and sick, so can anxiety. The combination of the two could make you feel bad and that's what's happening. Calm down as much as you can. Getting in a tiz won't help. If you have to rely on others then do so. It won't always be this way. Accept help willingly. Don't feel you are putting people out. A lot of good genuine folk like to help out so let them. Try not to stay in bed too much. It gives you too much time to think and that is a real problem in anxiety. We overthink. We go round in circles. Distraction is helpful but I know you may not feel like 'doing something'. Give it time. You came out before and can do it again. This is a setback so treat it as such. It WILL pass. Jon.
  27. 4 points
    I've had the very same fear before. How I got over it was with a bit of logic. Everyone is afraid of having a heart attack. Everyone. No one wants one and everyone would be scared if they thought they were having one. I balanced the liklihood of me actually having one vs me just having anxiety. Its more likely, like 99.9% likely that it's anxiety. Next I decided it could happen one day or it might not. I don't know and neither does the next guy. Worrying will not stop it happening. I can worry until my teeth fall out but if I'm going to have a heart attack, I just will, whether I worry or not. It's up to fate. I gave myself permission to worry when it is actually happening. When I'm in the back of an ambulance strapped to the machines. When I feel the pain. When it is actually happening and not before. Sometimes anxiety would give me heart palpitations and chest pain. So I'd wonder 'is it time to worry?' I'd then way up the liklihood that it is anxiety related palpitations and pain or an actually heart attack. It's very much more likely it's anxiety. I'd then promise myself if it got worse or didn't end in a set amount of time, I'd get it checked out, but until things got worse, there's still no point worrying or even paying it attention. Try to live in the moment. Accept it is up to fate as it is with every single human alive. Worry when it is actually happening, not before. I hope this helps. It takes practice but it can be done.
  28. 3 points
    Ok, update. Went to my Dr she said it's either a cyst or lipoma. Either way she's not worried and before I even mentioned soft tissue sarcoma , she said and it's not sarcoma like I know your mind is telling you 😆lol. She so gets me..we also talked about anxiety meds Bec I'm tired. I'm tired of the set backs. She prescribed me a benzo free anxiety medication low low dose. I'm going to probably make another thread to see if anyone is familiar with what she gave me. I'm relieved to maybe get some help. I tried but I can't do this on my own. And as much as I love my therapist the talk therapy doesn't go far with me. Thanks everyone for helping me get through this fear.
  29. 3 points
    Dear all, First time poster here, 22 year old male living in Australia, I've been following this forum for a while and it has been a great source of comfort to see that I am not the only one going through this horrible experience with health anxiety. Mine has been going on severely for about six weeks now, starting IMMEDIATELY after I googled the symptoms of that dreadful disease - funny that! Immediately all of the symptoms, which we all know are both generated by our anxious minds and EXTREMELY REAL, started happening. Just thought I'd share something that has been helping with my recovery and made me, ironically, laugh about the mess our irrational minds can make of us! I'm lucky enough to have a father who is an extremely experienced critical care doctor, specializing in neurology and respiratory medicine. He is also an ex-bodybuilder. Immediately he told me I'm not sick, he said any doctor could spot it a mile away if I was, and after I kept on bugging him he put me on a workout he used to do, something from a book by Arnold Schwarzenegger, that involved every muscle group. Push ups, dips, sit ups, leg lifts, pull ups, squats, calf raises, everything. It was hell, but I COULD DO IT, even though it was only three pull ups or ten sit ups. And as long as I COULD DO IT, there is no reason to be worried. "You don't have a**, you're just anxious and unfit" he said. He also said that any serious disease will progress, and if it stays the same or gets better, there is very little reason to worry. My anxiety hasn't stopped after that, but now every time I do a strength test to prove I'm ok, I think about what he said and I get a little boost of confidence. You often feel like you're going crazy - I recently tried testing myself with a one legged squat, on my toes, in the shower, and then got anxious about the cramps and perceived weakness I felt afterwards! Hope this helps anyone even a little bit. Remember that the mind is so so powerful and can convince you of anything. Remember that it will get better, the panic will go away, trust your doctors, don't Google ANYTHING specific that isn't just "health anxiety" because that's the real beast we're dealing with, be grateful every day for the gift of being alive, and sometimes even laugh at yourself - half the things we try to test ourselves with, even very fit people would struggle! Wishing everyone a beautiful day, Matt
  30. 3 points
    Absolute sense, what you're feeling is automated introspective scanning coming from the subconscious. Your fearful of the feeling so you're asking for a 'status report' as your mind was away from the fear whilst you were preoccupied. You felt nothing whilst occupied which is as much evidence as you can possibly get that proves that what you have is anxiety.
  31. 3 points
    I am new to this forum and I am in your exact boat. I have been worried about ALS for 6 months ever since I had a brother in law diagnosed with it and started having twitches. I posted my story in my intro here. Today was my neurological appointment, and the Dr told me I was the 4th person this week that had presented with severe twitching all over the body and not a single one had ALS. She gave me a complete neurological exam and was told I passed with flying colors. I could have an MRI if I needed for peace of mind but in her professional opinion it was not necessary. She then told me I had something I had never heard of and explained my symptoms (muscle twitching, perceived weakness, trouble finding words (not slurring), fatigue, numbness, etc). Functional Neurological Disorder/Disease - FND. Often brought on by trauma, chronic stress/anxiety, panic attach, or even infection. In short, it is when you have no problem with the hardware in your brain (no tumor, cancer, stroke or structural disease such as MS or ALS) but there is a software problem in the way the brain is sending signals. I have scanned the document I was given below and the website it references. I did a search on this forum and only found 2 posts under FND so not sure how often it is mentioned or known. The big thing is it gave me a real explanation for my symptoms and something to believe in other than all the worse case scenarios I had been imagining in my head. It explains why the twitches don't stop even when I feel calm and why the jerkiness and trouble walking are not just in my head. And the great news is it is very reversible with therapies and other treatment. I encourage research on this and even googling it (yes, finally something positive to google). Having this knowledge helped my symptoms immediately. I hope this helps. Links to the websites in the document: http://www.neurosymptoms.org and http://www.fndhope.org
  32. 3 points
    You may want to find another PCP if they treated you like this. Get a second opinion - always good to ask.
  33. 3 points
    You can’t be serious. You really, really need to get some help and fast. You would question the sky is blue right now. Your anxiety is consuming you and you are not thinking rationally about anything at the moment.
  34. 3 points
    First of well, sorry to welcome you here, but welcome all the same. Loads of wonderful and understanding people in this forum. Second of all, our anxiety is not silly, don't let yourself feel that way and don't dismiss it. The anxiety, whether misplaced or not, is very real, and some people have a hard time understanding why "we can't just get over it." The truth is, if it were that easy, none of us would need a forum like this. I can say therapy did me a lot of good. I still struggle with HA now and then, but I am much better off than I was 20 years ago. I view my HA as a chronic condition that flares up once in a while. The difference is I have put it in a place where it flares up now when there is a real medical issue to deal with. Back in the day, I would be able to pretty much conjure up symptoms from nowhere and obsess about those. I now know a headache can be a headache, it does not have to be a brain tumor. A new mole does not have to be melanoma (though I have so many moles, they drive me nuts once in a while). The basics that have helped me in my struggle with HA: 1. I never google. My recent flare up with my wife's health issue started because in a deeper, genuine effort I thought I could google perimenopause without issue. Whoops. Was I wrong. Right down the cancer spiral to the bottom. So, stay away from google. 2. Try to live in the moment, and when the anxiety comes up, get busy, do not fold into myself. 3. Exercise. Even if it is just a short walk, exercise helps me burn off that extra adrenaline. 4. Eat well, even when I don't want to. Eat healthy food, and make sure I eat enough. Stay away from extra sugar and caffeine. The last part is rough, I am a Starbucks addict, so I don't live what I preach too well there. ? 5. Something my councilor told me, "it's only anxiety." It is a self mantra, when I feel the anxiety come up, I repeat that to myself, and it is amazing for me that it takes a lot of the power anxiety has over me and calms it. It really worked for me, your mileage may vary. Anyway, sorry you don't have understanding at home, I can only imagine how rough that would be, but we are a good sounding board, so welcome!
  35. 3 points
    I just wanted to thank everyone for there support through my hard times. It's nice to be apart of group who is understanding. I was ashamed of being scared all the time. Being a man I felt it made me less of one for being scared all the time. I realize know that's no true everyone has a battle in life at some point. My battle came at 34. I had my mri and it was all fine. Some minor things that had no medical significance. Every test has been done. My doctors where on top of it. So I guess I am ok and anxiety took over making things worse. I am now trying to except the answers I got and move on with my life. Health anxiety is horrible and I feel everyone who struggles with it. Thanks for the help all.
  36. 3 points
    Hello All! I've been missing in action for some months now, but I have returned with wonderfully magical news to share with each and every person here! I'll start off by telling you my diagnoses: Major Depressive Disorder, Treatment Resistant, Moderate Degree, Recurring Episodes; Panic Disorder with Agoraphobia; Anxiety Disorder, and Trichotillomania. I have tried about 85% of the SSRIs on the market, various Antipsychotics, Benzos, Mood Stabilizers, and Homeopathic remedies; EMDR Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Hypnotherapy, Meditation, Breathing Techniques, Visualization, Self Talk, Self Hypnosis, Soul Retrieval Ceremony (a Shamanic Ceremony), Massage Therapy, Exercise, Heliotherapy, Adjusting my Diet, and Reiki Therapy...I think that covers it. Last month, I was preparing to elect Electroconvulsive Therapy as a treatment resort to help with my disorders. In the nick of time, my Psychiatrist mentioned Ketamine. I'd never heard of it, and so I did research on the method of this treatment. Ketamine is FDA approved for Anesthesia in surgical procedures. There are also studies on Ketamine being a successful treatment for Chronic Pain. In addition, Ketamine is a street drug, Special K, that has a hallucinogenic quality. Finally, as of recent years, there are studies for using low doses of Ketamine to treat Major Depression (although it is not FDA approved to treat MDD). It wasn't long before I felt the strongest sense of hope and desire to undergo this treatment; just thinking to myself, "This sounds too good to be true!" To make my hope grow even brighter, there just happened to be a Psychiatrist about 60 miles away that offered the treatment! The following week, I told my Psychiatrist about my findings, and he gave me the thumbs up to contact the Psychiatrist that offered Ketamine Infusion Treatments. My first consultation was set, I ended up being a suitable candidate, and had my appointment for my first Infusion scheduled!! BAM! I don't have the words to share with you to express adequately how I've responded to this treatment that is available. My very first Infusion..I was freed from the weight, that heavy, dark, lonely, cloud that followed me for so long. I could breath!! And it only continued to get better as the days passed. Thus far, I have had 4 Infusions, and I have one remaining. I found myself again, because of Ketamine; I feel again, because of Ketamine; I laugh now, because of Ketamine; I have more understanding of what I've been struggling with, because of Ketamine; I see things I've never seen before, because of Ketamine; I hear things that I've never heard in my life, because of Ketamine; I'm as goofy as ever (and not afraid to show it), because of Ketamine; I want to LIVE, because of Ketamine Infusion Treatments!! In closing, I must stress that I am NOT recommending anyone to make any attempt, whatsoever, to treat themselves with Ketamine in an uncontrolled, unmonitored environment!!! You want to live, not die!!! Also, there is not such thing as a "Silver Bullet" in treating everyone. I just wanted to share my success story, because if this story help even a single person, then I would be so, so happy!
  37. 3 points
    Talk to medicinal MJ experts. To avoid the panic you want a strain high in CBD and low in THC. CBD is what chills you out, THC is what gives you the high and psychological trips that can make the panic bad. Its also one of those things that if you expect to freak out you will freak out.
  38. 3 points
    Holls gives good advice. The state of anxiety that you are in right now is SOOOOO hightened that your body is going to be responding in ways that it would not normally do, and you are going to be scanning an interpreting every little thing your body does. When I was in the throes of ALS fears, I spend several hellish weeks monitoring every sensation as I was engaged while in my yoga, step aerobics and weightlifting classes. I was positive my balance was off in tree pose; my quads were definitely weaker in warrior pose; I was certain that I was stumbling during my highly choreographed step classes. As I look back on that period, maybe I was really experiencing those things as a somatic response, or maybe I was imagining them. I am not sure, and really, it doesn't matter bc once the anxiety started to calm down, I quit focusing so much on my body and am aware that, in fact, my balance is good, my legs are strong and my coordination is just fine. Just like yours is! This past week in yoga, we were doing some weird pose and my inner thighs were shaking like crazy. The instructor assured me that was not abnormal given the stress I was placing on those muscles. All this to say that just because we experience or perceive something being "off" with our bodies does not mean it is indicative of a dread disease. Create a mantra in your mind to say to yourself when the irrational thoughts are looping in your mind; maybe something assuring that the neuro told you . . . and disable google if necessary. It is poison. If you are unable to sleep, and mindfulness does not help, take a sleep aid. You will get through this. Remind yourself that the state you are in as not fixed. You will move past it. It is temporary. Sending you good thoughts.
  39. 3 points
    Doctor has called me 3 times today and his surgical tech has called twice and emailed 3 times. Whew! He's going to reschedule the cystocopy for after I get an MRU. He was very upset that my test was cancelled because the tech where I was to go said I couldn't have the test except in the hospital after 3 days of steroids and a massive dose of Benadryl (which would call for me to be driven to the hospital an hour away). I don't need pre treatment so he's re ordered the MRU and has told me to demand to speak with the tech and tell them he authorized no pre treatment and they can call him if necessary. While I was on the phone, I'd gotten another notice from Lab Corp about a test being released tomorrow at 10:35. It was the cytology and so I told him I'd be Googling and could he tell me if it was okay. He said it was normal so not to worry and stay off Google! URINENEGATIVE FOR MALIGNANT CELLS. Now I have to find a place (3 within 100 miles) that will do my MRU. I left a message at the place where I always get my MRI/ CT scans and asked for Floyd the tech to call me tomorrow. I'm hoping HE can do it. He's super cool! This doctor is AWESOME!
  40. 3 points
    I've never used them, but I can't imagine they're very useful. I think it depends on circumstances. There are many things that may seem trivial, but ultimately only seeing a doctor in person is the best way to get answers. For example, one may have symptoms of a common illness that they can easily explain, but said symptoms are shared with some other illness, and the only way to distinguish between the two is a physical examination or a blood test. Obviously a doctor cannot do those things online. As for questions such as the one you mentioned here, well, it's also easy for someone online (including a doc) to misunderstand the question. I think seeing a doc in person is almost always the ideal method for resolving such questions. Just my opinion.
  41. 3 points
    For me its The Vicar of Dibley, Keeping Up Appearances, The IT Crowd and Black Books.
  42. 3 points
    Girlie... HUGS! Now what are you doing? Negative thinking.. anticipating something you have no idea the outcome right? You are so scared of the end result.. Anxiety lives in the future. What if? what if?? We cannot answer that. But worrying yourself sick before hand will do you no good right? As I said before.. You set the goal to go and you are .. Give yourself a pat on the back because that is brave and awesome of you. So you go and do u then get stuck in the waiting game? Of course. But you have a choice here.. Sit by the phone wait and panic thinking the WORST. OR stay busy.. put your focus elsewhere and say.. I will face whatever comes to me when it comes. Because thinking the worst will set u up for failure. You will fear yourself into a frenzy thinking this is it , IT WILL be bad. And then when he results come back clear you think OMG why did i do that to myself when I had nothing to worry about in the long run. Fact: we cannot change the outcome But we can control how we react in the process. Positive thinking goes a long way... Try inserting the WHAT IF POSITIVE in where you are placing the negative.. What if : I get a clear result and and healthy and no worry What if: After I get my great results I buy myself a nice ***insert here*** What if: Going to this appointment and making it through gives me such a boost of energy to be able to handle things in the future and set me on a great path You CAN do this... But sitting there over thinking it and worrying about the negative will only make you miserable . You already know this . One step at a time.. one moment at a time. we cant live in the future because it hasnt happened yet.. You have to just live for TODAY. and dont put down the fact that you are brave and courageous and you are going to the appointment that is HUGE. I am proud of you as should you be. Keep it up... Everything will be ok XXX
  43. 3 points
    Hi all! I am so frustrated with this illness. I have been doing/trying everything and it just seems as if I take 2 steps forwards and 5 steps back. I just need your support, and hearing from others who are going through this or that can relate will truly help. Today has been so emotional for me, and I am so tired of living like this. Here's my back story: History: I had an amazing childhood! Was a typical kid, played sports, ran track from middle school all the way through college. I've traveled all over, vacationed, had lots of fun, made great friends and lived a pretty normal life. 2013: I still worked out but my food intake was pretty bad lol. I was married in 2011 and had a baby 2012. I had an awesome job and life was good. Around 2013, I noticed when I was driving my grandmother home at night on the freeway, I felt this intense "outer body experience" (unbeknownst to me as panic/anxiety). I was about to pull over but I didn't want to freak her out so I just fought through it, and wrote it off as some sort of gas fumes coming from the cars into my vents. This happened many once or twice more while driving at night on the freeway, but I just ignored it. 2014 My life started to change a bit, my job became extremely demanding, my marriage was crumbling because we were neglecting each other. 2 hour commutes each way, hustling to get to daycare, and scramble to make dinner, all to do it again for 5 days. Weekends were made to get laundry, groceries, and clean up our home as I also work a part time job Saturdays. There was no more time for me, I was always on the go! Feb 2015: This is when disaster strikes. My son was ill for a few days, so as mom, I didn't sleep. My husband and I decided to call out of work as we did not sleep. I decided to go to the gym. I started working out and noticed heart palpitations, but ignored it. Then all of a sudden I had the outer body experience again. I kind of brushed it off but had it in the back of my head. 3 days later, I taught my dance class after work, and 30 minutes later i grabbed my head and had a real intense "out body experience" . I thought I was about to die in front of the class. My heart was pounding, and my thoughts were racing "something bad is happening to me" and I didn't know how to go about things. As I drove home, I began to freak out on the freeway. I didn't know whether I should have pulled over or scream at the top of my lungs, I just felt like I was going bat Shyt crazy and I didn't know why. I thought maybe my workouts are too intense and I need to slow down. It seem to be the most logical answer since thats when these episodes started to occur most frequently. The next day, i was talking about it with my mother then BAM! It started to hit me again. The outer body experience! "oh Shyt mom its happening" I hung up on her so fast and try to calm myself. However the irrational thoughts started pouring in "what's happening to me?" "Do I have a heart issues?" The more I thought, the more my heart pounded, my palms became sweaty. I sat down and thought just calm down...but the more I tried to talk to morsel, it just seem like I was pouring gasoline on a fire! I felt like I had the Panic Demon sitting on my shoulder saying "guys she's not down yet, she's a fighter...lets crank it up a notch". They started to coming in like a Tsunami! My chest started to tighten up, I could breath, and my legs and hands went numb. I collapse in my husbands arms while my 3 year old son was eating dinner. At this point I knew I was dying. I told my husband to call 911 and I can't believe I'm going to die in front of my family. I was rushed to the hospital to only be told I was stressed. Stressed...really??? No way, this is bull shyt. In my mind, I was healthy and I worked out to relieve stress, and this couldn't possibly the cause of this non sense. I followed up with my primary care doctor who told me I had just had a Panic attack and I have anxiety. I heard nothing else after that, as she tried to explain what happened. Everything else sounded like Charlie Brown. I couldn't believe she was prescribing Xanax (which made me feel depressed by the way). After this, my life has never been the same, and a can of worms was now opened. April 2015 I took off work for a bout month and a half. I was devistated and crushed. I just felt like something terrible happened to me and everyone was brushing it off because I was young (32yrs old). When I went back to work, I could no longer sit in traffic, ride the metro, take the bus or cross the street without having a panic attack. I was miserable!!! I had people wondering and asking me why I was out so long, and I was so embarrassed to tell them because Im having panic attacks and I don't know why. I could no longer keep it up. The more I went to work, the worse my symptoms became. So I then made the hardest decision in my life, and that was to resign from my dream job (which was a blessing). As soon as I resigned my symptoms started to subside within DAYS! I WAS happy again! I was able to drive on the freeway and teach my dance class again. Life was great! So I thought. I gave up my dance class as I didn't want to add additional stress. However, it seem like once I stopped working out, my symptoms started to slowly creep back. July 2015 I had another MAJOR panic attack while driving on a dark road with no lights. I thought my life was over! I couldn't see, hear, or comprehend anything. I felt as if I had just taken 4 shots of patron, and mixed it with Jamerson. "This can't be normal! This has to be some type of brain disease!" Currently I eat EXTREMELY CLEAN. Almost raw. I still eat meat and I take magnesium at night. I have problems sleeping, and when I do sleep its not quality sleep. The only thing I drink is water. I do not spoke and I don't drink. I pray every morning and show gratitude before I open my eyes. I mediate and stretch before I do leave my bedroom. I speak positive affirmations daily and try to live in the moment. I try to stay optimistic even on the days I struggle with. I have migraines 2 times a month. My skin is extremely dry and now I starting to have stomach issues. I was told I may have an ulcer, and the GT wants to do and endoscopy. I really do not want to do that as I have never been put to sleep. My left arm is constantly numb. I've seen a cardiologist, neurologist, a wellness Doctors, and I had CT scans, etc. Everything is clear. I am slightly anemic but I have been that way all of my life. Today Was emotional for me. I just broke down. I feel like I walk around wearing a big "S" on my chest and try to stay strong, but today I failed. My son wanted to go to the park, but as we walked my Panic/Anxiety started to flare up. I tried to fight it but I couldn't, I tried to breath the way I do when I mediate, to no avail. I didn't want something to happen to me and he was left by himself, so I turned around. That was hard for me to swallow. He shouldn't have to suffer because of his mother. For that reason my entire system shut down. I just feel like this in no way to live life. I am so tired of taking 3 steps forward to be knocked back down. I love nature, I love walking, working out. I find it hard to just take a walk because my body starts prepping for another Panic attack. I feel like I am trapped in someone's body and I want out. I notice when I don't sleep well or eat enough, my aniexy/panic is heighten. I haven't had quality sleep since January 2015. I get tired of staying up to 2/3 am just to pass out to go to sleep. I have the greatest support system in the world. I just feel like I am a burden on my family at times. I just want to feel normal again. I apologize for the novel and Typos. I didn't re-read this post because I started to get a migraine typing this. I wouldn't wish this on anyone. I pray I wake up tomorrow with a better start. I just don't know what else to do. If you read this entire post. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Even if you don't respond, please just pray for me Positive vibes sent you all. Peace and blessings to each and every one of you!
  44. 3 points
    Hi Ben that was a very nice post especially the part about what religion we may practice. Because at the end of they day we are all human beings treading on the same path called Life.. and I agree if it wasn't for Gilly and her original helpers I would never have met some pretty awesome people on this site and in the chat room. They all know who they are So thanks again Gilly... even though I don't celebrate Xmas I will be thinking of all you who do and hope it is a memorable one you can look back on fondly in the years to come. Amber xoxo
  45. 3 points
    Hi. gale. No, you don't need a diagnosis you have one. Anxiety! Now I understand you have been to the docs because you are on medication. Everyone who comes to anxiety at first has problems realising what 'IT' can do. 'IT' can mimic any known disease and some unknown ones. It can go on and on if we don't take action. By action I mean make an effort to combat it. Now I suggest that does not involve fighting and struggling with 'IT'. 'IT' loves a good fight and feeds on the fear that fighting causes. 'IT' feeds on fear. Remember that because it's the whole key to recovery. Without fear there can be no anxiety. It's always at the root of the problem. So, how do you stop or turn off fear? You can't. Now that is not a note of despair. It's the realisation that you need to FACE and ACCEPT the way you feel for the moment. Stop adding 'second fear', the Oh my goodness, what's that?' and the constant 'What ifs'.‌ Does it ever go away? Yes, it does but it takes time and that's where the frustration comes in. We anxiety sufferers are an impatient lot. We want to get well yesterday, and that's very understandable. You have to give it as much time as it allows. Trying to rush or force your way out of anxiety is counter productive. It creates more tension. Go with it. Give up the struggle. Have you looked at 'The 100 Symptoms of Anxiety' under GAD on the site? You will find all your symptoms there and more. Now you don't have to have them all. We are individuals, and some get totally different symptoms to others. There is no set pattern in anxiety and that's what makes it so difficult to understand. Keep accepting and try and be as patient as you can. It won't last for ever; promise! Jon.
  46. 3 points
    yes i love your idea Gilly ...... we are a cool gang i must admit..... we could play beach volleyball... some of us could just laze around on the beach... some of us could be daring enough to go in the OCEAN... i am afraid of water LOL ... I could finally bring Cubmanben his cookies that he has been waiting for....LOL but you have to share. You all are awesome.. and who knows maybe one day some of us might really meet each other in real life... NOW THAT WOULD BE TOTALLY AWESOME !!! Lots of love out today, kinda having an emotional day but i will be okay because there are good people on this site to pour my heart too. Love Amber
  47. 3 points
    You see, you must stop Googling. The doctors know what they are talking about. They would have seen these results knowing what they mean and have concluded that you are fit and healthy. These results can be twisted and manipulated by your anxiety to fit it's negative agenda. Those results will be in the within the normal ranges. The issue with HA is that you will read what Dr Google says without any knowledge of what it means and believe it MORE than what a qualified, professional heart Dr says. Says a lot about HA doesn't it. Try not to read between the lines and analyse, you will always spin it negatively.
  48. 3 points
    Update... Hi guys, I'm still here! Sorry I haven't been able to help out and reply to comments lately. I'm doing great! Almost ready to go back into my original line of work, been putting applications in everywhere. Been driving heaps! Haven't had a panic attack since god knows when. I was certainly tested last week as I watched Cyclone Marcia head straight for my best friend on his yacht! My god talk about tense! Amazingly he and the yacht came through fine and I was able to drive the next day to go help in the recovery. Funnily enough, it was me who kept his family calm through the ordeal as we lost phone contact with him. I'm really noticing my health improving with my attitude, I have a lot more energy. I sometimes wonder if anxiety is trying to creep back in, then I stop and think "let it, bring it on!" I feel I could handle almost anything these days. Anyway, I'm still here guys, just a bit busy to post
  49. 3 points
    Aloha from Maui! There have been some ups and downs but we are having a wonderful time and I haven't let anxiety stop me. It is harder to accept and fake it when away from home so admittedly there have been some moments when I have counted the days until we get to go home to where I feel most safe. But I don't want to wish away my vacation either and I am really trying to live in the moment and also remind myself that security comes from within and not from a place, situation or person. We have enjoyed some afternoon cocktails poolside. Coconut vodka with pineapple and guava juices. Very yummy! And I made a mental toast to my friends here. Sending you all sunny, warm thoughts and ocean breezes. See you all back here In a few days.
  50. 3 points
    I think I am getting the hang of the practice of "acceptance". I want to explain it here in the hopes it will help someone else - or in case I forget again and need to remind myself how to get it back! It has been several weeks since I got worked up with worrying about "what if?" and "how will I?". It's not that the worries and fears are gone - they are all still there - but my attitude towards them has shifted. Last night a few worries popped into my head about the upcoming Christmas season, the things I need to do, traveling, finances etc. but instead of worrying about "how I will handle it all?" or "what if I get anxious?" I simply noted the thoughts and then reminded myself that I only deal with the here and now. No sense running all that stuff through my brain when I am laying in bed at 10pm. I told my husband it's like I have made a compartment in my brain where those fears and thoughts go. If I catch one I send it to that compartment. I might have to go and retrieve something from there at some point but more likely stuff will just sit there and eventually go away of it's own accord. The compartment is there in my head but it's just set off to the side. Oftentimes I am aware of the compartment and I realize there are things in there but they just sit and make a bit of background noise while I get on with the task at hand. I don't pull them out to examine them. Sometimes I feel anxious but I just tell myself that those feelings should just live in the compartment too. So I'm aware of the anxious feeling - and I don't really like the way it feels - but it just has to stay in the compartment out of the way of the real things that occupy my life. But I don't let the anxious feeling worry me because I remember that worries and fears go into that compartment too. I only deal with the here and now and not "what if's". So the anxiety hasn't really gone away. But I have put it in it's own compartment. And the best I can explain is that it doesn't sting as bad from there. I am still aware of it but it's just a discomfort instead of an all-consuming, horrible feeling. It is taking time and practice and some days it happens more easily than others but I know that with more time and practice the act of compartmentalizing will become more and more automatic and I will likely become less and less aware of the dim noise coming from it.