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mollyfin last won the day on April 18 2020

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  1. Good luck dude. You've beaten this thing back before and you can do it again!
  2. Everyone's nondominant hand is smaller than their dominant hand. I found that out in fifth grade when one really bored kid said to no one in particular, "Why is one hand fatter than the other?" and the smartest kid in the class just mimed writing. Didn't know until then that everyone had two different sized hands; just thought I was weird. No real point to the story. But we do indeed tend to have one bigger hand than the other. If you're left-handed, that might be worth mentioning to your doctor, but even then it's probably nothing to worry about. It's also normal to have HA relapses. Having it under control for that long means you were doing something right so don't be hard on yourself! You'll get through this!
  3. Yeah, to rule out causes of symptoms that were thought to be unrelated to any serious neuro problem but asses needed to be covered. Brain is mostly normal on that level at least. Some white spots probably migraine related given my history.
  4. Missed everyone! Hope you're all great!
  5. You might try directly messaging them, but the lack of followup posts does kinda suggest it was nothing worrisome!
  6. Yeah going through my hyst I met a lot of endometrial cancer patients and the majority of them are doing great. One has sadly since passed, but the rest are thriving, even some of them being stage 4 patients. They'll always have cancer but it's controlled. Of course there can be very dangerous endometrial cancers, but they're rarer, I think. I really don't get why insurance has to be such a fight. What the heck am I giving you all this money per month for if you're going to decline to pay for everything?! Time to bust out the little fella again.
  7. And you would be atypical because...why? Do you have a history of GYN problems? Family history of ovarian cancer? Are you over 60 years of age? If you're blowing off the idea of your being typical "just because," well, I hate to tell you, but it's your anxiety you need to worry about, not your ovaries. The doctor told you not to worry. Your problem is anxiety. Yes, it could be different this time. A piano could also fall on you tomorrow. Part of learning to deal with anxiety is accepting the tiny possibility that yeah something could be very wrong right now, but you can't live every moment of your life like that's so, or you'll never live.
  8. Her uterine polyp has grown so it needs to be removed and tested. Oncologist is consulting with a colleague to see how long they think she can safely leave it while she fights her insurance provider. At this point they're not anticipating anything catastrophic but it does need to be biopsied. So I was hoping for this to be the end of it but it could've gone a lot worse.
  9. Her appointment's tomorrow morning. Trying to be sane about it, but we all know I'm awful at that. I'm generally fine with normal doctor visits and strange symptoms, but as soon as a doctor finds something amiss is when I start to lose my marbles. Oh well. I'm wearing my lucky shirt and that's literally about all I can do at this point, so. Just gotta wait and see.
  10. My SO finally got her repeat ultrasound, and got a voicemail Friday afternoon to make an appointment to come in to discuss her test results and "treatment." Naturally the fact that there's something to treat set me off (yes, I realize that they don't even know for sure what the problem is; yes, I realize it could be something not devastating; HI MY NAME IS MOLLYFIN I LIKE TO JUMP TO THE WORST POSSIBLE CONCLUSIONS IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU YOU MUST BE NEW) and has it ever been a long weekend. Uh, not the good kind. Nothing to do but keep moving forward. No sense worrying until I know there's something to worry about. But do you ever feel like if you stop worrying, disaster is just waiting to strike the moment you let your guard down? Dunno if anyone here was a fan of The Simpsons in its golden age, but there was a bit with Lisa trying to explain the difference between correlation and causation to Homer, saying she could declare that a rock keeps tigers away, because, hey, there are no tigers around, right? Homer considers this, pulls out his wallet and offers to buy the rock. Sometimes I feel like exactly that, except unlike Homer, I'm not too stupid to realize how ridiculous I'm being. Still doesn't stop it from feeling that way, though.
  11. You can't "lace" something with fentanyl. It's given in tablet (rarely, I think, since it's mainly given to end-stage patients or patients with severe pain from cancer or chemotherapy) or dermal patch form. But that doesn't matter, because you KNOW this is all anxiety-based, because you're here, on an anxiety forum, not in the ER, right? Recognizing that it's anxiety is a great beginning, but if you keep looking for people to tell you that it's not reality, you're still letting the anxiety control you. Talk to your doctor, therapist, whomever, about how to calm your anxiety on your own, without Google or reassurance. There are self-help books and workbooks for managing obsessive thoughts, and there are great resources posted right here. And I'm betting a lot of people here have techniques they can suggest for how they work through their anxious times. I literally have arguments with my own thoughts, reminding myself my fears aren't reality. And sometimes that doesn't help at all, and I'm back off the rails, or I KNOW it's anxiety but that doesn't help. But it's better than it was. That may not work for you, and there are plenty of other methods for coping with anxiety. Hell, just coming here and talking about it can help sometimes. But right now it doesn't seem to be helping you much and you seem kind of stuck. What has worked for you in calming anxiety in the past? Does it no longer help?
  12. Logical, no, but understandable and to be expected for those of us with HA, heck yeah. Mostly I just try to force myself to ignore it but to say it doesn't always work is an understatement.
  13. It can take years to successfully diagnose MS. Yet another reason incessant medical testing is no good for anxiety - it's ultimately never going to be "enough." If the doctor thinks it's not MS, that's the closest thing to a definitive answer you're going to get, and your best bet is to work on accepting that it's not always possible to be "sure" you don't have something. And even if it were, you'd soon need reassurance again anyway. Presumably you trust this doctor or you wouldn't have gone to them. They don't just send random people off the street into an office and say "Okay, you're a neurologist now; just guess some stuff." A medical specialist said you're probably fine; I would work on the anxiety that won't let you accept that as good enough.
  14. CBD oil gives my SO massive panic attacks. Not sure why since THC doesn't affect her negatively. I took buspar once upon a time, but I honestly don't remember if I didn't keep on because it didn't work for me or if side effects were too annoying. When was the last time you had blood work done? Might be worth finding out if you're low in anything you might be needing so you're not taking redundant supplements and aren't missing anything. Plus you really should clear all natural remedies with your doctor just in case.
  15. Two doctors have told you not to worry. I know easier said than done, but your anxiety doesn't hold a medical degree! What did the doctor at urgent care tell you to do?