The Vent Your Anger Thread

[Kai 1]

This thread is perfect for me lol.  I'm just gonna rant about how incredibly exhausted I am from the last few depressive relapses I've had.  It really is a monster of it's own, I have a lot of sh*t I need to get done rn, but my ankle injury and my lack of drive/energy keep me from dealing with everything/everyone.  My family loves to emphasize everyone's successful careers & serve as a huge roadblock for me otw to recovery.  The church I grew up in still demands a lot from me, cause I have to volunteer as payment for living w mom.  I need to bring my car to the shop after payday, because it  wont start anymore, butI heard tows are pricey.  I have missed so many deadlines for taxes/insurance, etc....  Self-neglect is my bestfriend, I've made sure that my friends think i dislike them or that I feel like I'm better.  Add some homosexuality & a very christian household & you get the hot mess that is me.  I still get angry at myself for letting these things really get to me, I know I should stop, but I've been raised to take responsibility for everything that happens in my life & I can't just stop wanting to be a different more better person.  I'm terrified of going back to school, but people have been stressing the importance of being in a class.  I've failed myself by catching feelings for my friend, I told myself not to get too close, I remember how bad my last heartbreak was, & yet I kept romanticizing every smile & friendly gesture.  Now, I'm regretting being so involved w/ her & this has added so much more stress.  The thing that bothers me so much about my circumstances is that most of the problems that I deal with could've been avoided.  My 'friend' told girl A about how I felt w/o my permission & this made it a thing, when it could've been something that passed quietly.  As for my injury, it was my fault for walking into the crowd, but I was literally just in line to use the restroom when these drunks dude's fight carried into the restroom.  I could place the blame anywhere rly, I'm just over it all.  I'm super annoyed & exhausted.

[Total Eclipse 44]

[jonathan123 2268]

Hi. TE. Thanks for the clip, but it does raise a multitude of questions.  'Who am I' has been asked throughout the centuries. Plato said 'Man. know thyself'. Do we? Know ourselves? Carl Jung talked about the Persona. The masks we wear when we are in different situations. I talk to the mail man in one way, but put on, metaphorically, another mask or face for someone else. So we are many faceted people, fragmented. Like a fragmented hard drive on a computer. All over the place. 'Pull yourself together' may seem hard when said by ignorant people, but there is some truth in it. The word 'whole' has it's root in 'holy' and 'holistic'. Jung talked of the process of 'individuation', pulling all the fragments together to become a whole person.

There is so much that could be said about the words on your clip. It's so often true that no one does take the time to find out. We seem to exist in a bubble of our own. It's not until adversity strikes that we begin to communicate with each other, as on this site. That's sad! It so often takes time for a person to open up and talk to someone about their problems. In counselling I found it's often weeks before the real problems emerge.

I don't know who the young lady in the clip is. But she does need help.  Kind regards.    

[Total Eclipse 44]

She does. I think she's from a movie but I hope her movie self gets better 🙂  Last night, I had a depressive spiral. I'm recovering from a concussion that happened two days ago. And I'm feeling a void and a really odd emotional crash. I realized my anxiety and shyness pulled me away from a lot of things I shouldn't of let it.

[Total Eclipse 44]