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Gilly

The 'Anxiety' Olympics - Your achievements

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This was joycicles idea and I think it's a great one! The Anxiety Olympics. This thread is for you to note your achievements, anything you do, overcome, your successes - write it here!

 

Made a phone call you were dreading, an appointment that terrified you, taken a med you have been too scared to take, gone to a family party, walked a mile, had a worry and didn't google, survived a day shopping, literally anything that you have done despite your anxiety/panic/depression etc, write it in this thread and feel proud of your achievements. I can't offer you a prize, there are no gold medals at these Olympics, everyone is a winner!

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Right! I have filled up my entry form and now await other participants to run with me. Not aginst me beacuse I am sure competition is not intended.

 

I am sure hot weather makes anxiety worse. Why it should I know not. But I got up this AM with a mild dose of anxiety. Rather a sort of apprehension. Not the 'end of the world' type. (Well, not quite).  Can't change the weather so I got down to some model  boatbuilding, ACCEPTED how I felt and, pleased to say, feel better. Still hot but not bothered.    Jon.

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I've been walking around in dresses with short sleeves and not giving a fuck what people think of my scars from self harm :) I'm happy to be moi <3

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Great thread :). I've held down a job for a year plus now.

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I have to share a powerful moment that happened for me earlier in the week. To provide a little background, I had a complete mental breakdown in the fall of 2010 and became crippled by anxiety, depression and panic to the point where I didn't work and rarely left home. Prior to this, I'd been very social and adventurous. I had a photo of myself from 2008 where I was standing at the top of Central Park in New York City looking strong and happy. Through the roughest points of my breakdown, I'd look at this photo and cry at my decline. I couldn't imagine being well enough ever to go on a vacation like that again. I vowed that I would get better and one day I'd return to the location in that photo. Fast forward to this week, after 2.5 years of medication and therapy, I made a visit to New York City. Within a few hours of arrival, we went to Central Park and scoped out the location from my old photo. I stood in the very same spot, took a deep breath and smiled as my husband took a photo. I've attached both.

post-14-0-87109800-1374878943_thumb.jpg

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Wonderful!  Fantastic!  That's what we want to hear. Well done.       Any more bods out there with great posts like this!!.    Jon.

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I'm so sorry I missed your post Tofu, WONDERFUL!! So proud of how you have come so far!! A true Rockstar!!

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And on that note, I am making progress. For my Birthday in August I went to restaurant in LEEDS (30 mile drive) and ate a HUGE meal, and I was not in any way anxious! Huge deal for me.

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Ok, so over the winter months I have felt like I have slacked off a bit and not achieved a great deal. I was feeling bored and a little cabin fever creeping up. Stephen is sick so we couldn't really do anything and I was thinking, the 'old me' would have gone for a walk into town, I had a little spare money, could have bought myself something, and I though but that was the old me, the thought of doing that now.. eek But then I thought why? I have been doing much better, why can't I give it a go? I talked to Stephen and with a little bribing ;) (I promised him a star trek ship to add to his collection) he agreed to drive me and park just out of town whilst I went for a walk around the city center and the shops.

 

Sooo I did it :) I spent over an hour browsing around, went to Lush and got myself some awesome bath bombs, found a hair product shop and bought 4 new colours to play with, found a new american candy store! w00t so got a few treats there, and finally went to the health food shop and got some honey and a few bits and bobs. Success :) I had a great time and feel so happy with myself!! 

 

Agoraphobia I am kicking your butt good! Bring on the summer!

 

The only down side to today is I feel like crap now, my throat is really sore and I got the sweats, think I'm coming down with what Stephen has, but guess what? I don't care!! 

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I have to share this. It's such a strange thing to be excited about but I know only you guys will get it lol!

So panic attacks don't bother me unless I'm driving. They used to bother me but now I know what they are, I kind of ignore/ accept them and get on with my day. Because I don't fear them and observe the symptoms with a relaxed attitude they never amount or escalate into anything. Except when I'm driving! I still drive, I just keep calm knowing I can pull over. I avoid places where I can't pull over, like bridges. I avoid long distance driving because I feel I'm so far from home or help if I really lost control I would be alone in a mess.

So anyway I was required for work to drive half an hour to a site, pick up something and return half an hour back. I had to do this twice a day for two days. This is long distance to me haha! I prepared myself mentally, I actually looked forward to it in a way because I knew once I'd done it, I wouldn't be as afraid anymore and it would get easier. I got up the morning of the drive terrified but determined. I said to myself "I don't care if you vomit, stop breathing, pass out, whatever, I will vomit and keep driving. I will keep driving and I will make it home, I will just be uncomfortable doing it"

I got to work all fired up with nerves ready to do battle with this beast! Then they told me I didn't have to do the first drive. Hahahaha!!! I was actually disappointed! A bit relieved but disappointed! I'd put in all this effort getting ready for battle and now the battle wasn't going to happen!

Anyway I did the second run of the day. I was uncomfortable on the way to site, my brain kept saying "turn around, go back!" It was screaming danger at me! But there was another part of me saying "not this time! Scream all you like we are going to keep going!" Once I made it to site and collected the package I headed for home and the fear was gone. I felt normal for the first time in ages! I always used to love driving long distance, especially for work because it meant you got a break to relax and just drive for a few hours. I was singing along to my tunes and just normal. Then I was so elated! Like I was on cocaine or something, I'd never felt so happy in all my life. I was so happy I couldn't wait to do the next drive and get that "high" of accomplishment again. The next day it rained. I had conquered driving but not driving in the rain. I started to get anxious again. Not as bad because I had done it and I knew I could again but the overcast light makes my depersonalization flare up. I took the same attitude that this was a battle I wanted to face. I got there and back, I wasn't as elated as the day before but I was normal. Now when I come across some new challenge with panic disorder I will forever be chasing that high again. Whether I get it or not doesn't matter, it's given me a reason to fight and a new perspective on the challenge. Instead of avoiding things, I now prepare for battle & chase the high, no matter what panic throws at me. Thanks for reading☺

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Great post lonesailor ...  terrific attitude on wanting to be able to accomplish something that was so difficult for you to face. I definitely get it...

 

I have recently been facing a decision on a life change and my anxiety level has been through the roof.  I was in CBT therapy for 2.5 yrs which ended in 2010 but because of the anxiety I am currently having, I know I need support. My therapist is no longer available and I just kept pushing off trying to find another one. Finally, a couple of weeks ago I made myself check out who is in my medical coverage. I made an appt and had my first session last week.  I'm glad I took the step and hope that I can get some much needed guidance so I can calm down....

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Well Done to all of You.You guys truely inspire me:)Ive had s****de thoughts very deeply And many times I felt worthless.I got over it by calling a anxiety helpline:)with a positive mind(since im always a negative nelly thats my achievement.

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