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Everything posted by Tuneuronerd95746

  1. Hey Pythonian, Welcome to the club. I'm likewise a new transplant from ol' AZ- it was a bastion of hope and guidance for a long time. Glad you found this place as well. Hope everything is going well for you. Best, Brad
  2. Hey jonathan, Thanks for the positive support and analysis. I am incredibly grateful for your time in writing that. I agree, naturally our bodies are low in temperature and metabolic activity. It makes sense that upon awakening our bodies are still readying themselves for action- moving from pure reliance on the parasympathetic to more so with the sympathetic nervous system. It's frustrating simply because it starts without any provocation. Nasty little bits of panic and stomach pains. Of course it fades eventually to more tolerable levels, but man what a bummer to start every day this way. Brad
  3. Hey Bterflymom, Thanks for the feedback. Wishing you a better 2017 as well. I appreciate the kind words. I just wish I could understand why the mornings are so awful. Morning and night are both rough, and I just get this high level of pressure mentally and in my stomach. Ugh. Hope things get better for you too!
  4. Hey all, Hope everyone has had a good holiday week. I just had a sort of generic question: Has anyone experienced intense anxiety upon awakening? I know that sounds ridiculous, particularly considering its before I really engage in any cognitive activity. I just wake up and boom, it's there and it's heavy. Somatically it feels like a pit in my stomach. It consistently dissipates after a few hours or when I finally convince myself to take my medication (Ativan). Any ideas on how to handle this frustrating pattern of anxiety? thanks for any feedback in advance. Brad
  5. It seems like you've been able to isolate a few symptoms or stool oddities that are likely linked to organic, non-serious causes (e.g., the lighter stool color). Oftentimes there are very simple explanations that we overlook in moments of fear and distress. We seek for evidence which confirms our biased interpretation of our health. For example, if I believe I have developed diabetes, I'm going to start overly attuning myself to symptoms of dry mouth, frequent urination, even something as vague as dizziness- I'm going to automatically associate these common occurrences to the diabetes. Yet, I may have had coffee all morning and my throat and mouth may have become parched. That same coffee binge will likely expedite my bathroom trip routine and lead to more urination, and over-caffeination can cause dizziness. What this silly example highlights is how there are simple circumstances which I failed to appreciate to explain my symptoms. My fear of some horrible outcome- diabetes- dominated my cognition. My annoying rambling aside, often we become neglectful of rather simple alternatives which may explain these relatively benign symptoms. I'm think that it is a combination of stress, change in sleep, and possible dietary modifications which together are causing these problems. That's not to say don't monitor your bowel movements- but remember to factor in the more obvious causes. best of luck, brad
  6. Hey, Sorry you're going through this right now. I too went on a "brain tumor" kick for several months when I was younger. Even now as I'm studying neuropsychology, I feel the urge to ascribe neurologic symptoms to heinous causes. Brain tumors are frequently associated with severe, consistent (nearly every day) headaches which do not lapse easily. They begin immediately upon awakening and are often resistant to over-the-counter medication with respect to pain. This would be just an associated, not confirmed marker, of possible herniation due to a foreign brain mass. Many of the other symptoms associated with tumors are not well defined. These symptoms you describe are not frequently found in most texts regarding tumors. A lot of what might occur depends on the location of the mass, and thus there is rarely a list of commonly occurring symptoms (other than chronic "upon awakening" headaches). Additionally, the neurologic markers you describe are inconsistent and not sensitive or specific to a given diagnosis. Light sensitivity, for example, could be associated with a whole host of neural (e.g., migraines, cluster headaches) as well as psychogenic etiologies (e.g., anxiety and panic disorder, as well as higher levels of distress, are linked with transient experiences of light aversion). These other symptoms you describe are likewise part of the criteria for nearly every general health or mental health category out there (e.g., muscle weakness, numbness, fatigue). Even symptoms such as difficulty concentrating, these are so commonly ascribed falsely to medical conditions when they often are due to psychological factors (e.g., depressive mood episode, manic episode, PTSD). As hard as is it is to convince yourself, realize that much of these problems you describe are not only common but are not at all convincingly associated with something as serious as a brain tumor. Sometimes the rule of Occam's Razor can be applied safely- the simplest explanation is the right one. You seem to be under a lot of distress, which will only amplify not only the experience but your attention to these problems. Hang in there, it'll pass. brad
  7. Hey Mel1981, Sorry to hear you're experiencing these symptoms. My SO likewise struggles with these type of bowel anomalies. It's easy to jump the gun regarding a diagnosis; whatever you do, don't visit Dr. Google when you feel like this. In agreement with these other supportive community members, I think you should try (easier said than done) to wait it out a little longer and see if symptoms subside, ebb and flow, or increase in intensity. Secondly, I'd definitely take stock on your mental health right now. Somatic complications, such as indigestion, change in appetite, nausea, bloating, and yes even bowel activity, are associated with distress. Whether something psychogenic is fully to blame, that would be hard to determine. I can say with confidence that worrying about the consequences as well as causes of these problems won't make the stress of the situation any easier. Which incredibly difficult to avoid given you are rightfully and appropriately concerned about your health. A third thing I should ask is whether you've either (1) changed anything dietary wise, including vitamin/supplement intake or (2) anything medication wise, including routine things such as birth control, blood pressure meds, cholesterol meds (even though it seems you're generally healthy which is excellent)? Small disruptions to your body's digestive system and waste removal process can lead to some annoying symptoms. As for a strong solution, I think continuing to monitor (but trying not to obsess over it) is an appropriate tactic at the present time. Again if you begin to notice a pattern to your symptoms, or they begin to get worse, then perhaps a doctor's visit just to be safe. Chances are it's a mixture of many factors including stress and general health, but not something serious like the C-word; don't jump to that! Bowel problems are incredibly common, even when they seem so strange. Hang in there! You'll get through this rough patch. feel better, brad
  8. Thanks Joycicle, Before I left I was vacuuming daily, and had washed sheets multiple times. Bombed apartment 3x as well. Really hoping when I go back the numbers will be lower. Thanks for all your positive feedback I really appreciate it. I've got to get over this phobia to function. I think it was the anxiety of having to clean daily for hours while coping with graduate work. It became too much. Let's hope it all winds down. Thank you!
  9. Thank you Joycicle for the response, and encouragement. I think my biggest fear is that the population is not under control. I know I can't expect to kill every single one right away- that's impractical. But it's the fact I can't solve this problem immediately. Like the fact it will take a few weeks for them all to completely die- that frustrates me and amps up my phobia. Either way, thank you for the kind feedback. I really really appreciate it. best, brad
  10. Hi Gilly, Thank you for your response. I really appreciate the feedback and positivity. My cat is actually a house cat; somehow one or two got tracked in and got on her (she wasn't medicated previously). Just sucks because I wasn't vigilant enough until the problem got out of hand. I know it can't be worse than it was when I slept there at first, but it's just so hard to conquer such a robust phobia of a location. Even knowing they're not lethal and aren't even prioritizing me. I just have to suck it up, because I've run out of funds to try and treat and I can't move out. thanks again for reading anything I wrote, I really appreciate it:) Best, brad
  11. Cratedream, Hope you got some relief, hang in there. Also I know this is delayed, but thought I'd share from experience (currently a therapist as part of my doctoral training, ironically suffering from panic attacks): CBT is the standard, empirically-supported treatment for panic disorder. It walks you through dysfunctional beliefs associated with the symptoms of panic (i.e., those pesky somatic, bodily changes we all experience as an attack surges into effect). It then paces you through a series of guided exposures to the symptoms of panic, in a way that you are able to recognize both the finite and low threat aspects of each bodily change. Finally, you're exposed to both imaginal (i.e., mentally in the therapist's office) and in vivo (real-life) scenarios where panic previously occurred to test out your newly acquired skills. Typically runs anywhere from 10-14 sessions, at about 45min-1hour a pop. Very effective- numerous studies have identified the clear benefits of self-help, online, and in-person CBT for panic disorder. These studies were RCTs (randomized, controlled trials) which adequately compare and contrast patients w/ health controls, as well as patients w/ other individuals receiving a comparable (non-CBT) treatment. Good luck!
  12. Hey all, To anyone who reads this, thank you in advance for your time and kindness. I struggled with PD for many years beginning in college. It faded away but has come back in full force over the last 1.5 months. Long story short: My apartment (while I left on a brief trip home from school) got infested by fleas. I have a major entomophobia (fear of insects), and was stuck alone with my poor kitten in a place loaded with them. I spent the next few days cleaning everything, washing sheets, vacuuming every nook and cranny (thankfully live in a studio that is primarily hardwood). I would see them hopping around (never bit me thankfully) in the vacuum bag- that obviously terrified me. I eventually got me and the cat out, dropped three bombs, and returned. Of course it wasn't a permanent solution- the bombs can't kill all of them. I left the apartment again due to the fear. I returned for a weekend and made it about 3 days before the anxiety of possibly being around the fleas got to much. I had to board my poor little cat for 18 days, and left to go see my family and fiance. I feel nothing but incredible surges of panic and distress when thinking of the fact I'm flying back to the apartment in 6 days. It terrifies me. I've had the place exterminated (sprayed) another 3 times since I left, but the phobia of these little parasitic specs horrifies me constantly. I can't escape the fear, even knowing my cat is now treated with medication and my apartment is thoroughly treated. Deep down I know the problem will resolve and they'll all die off, but god this has been the worst. So essentially, I'm away from home trying to eat and sleep properly again. My phobia of my own home due to the incident is incredibly strong (laughably an anti-agoraphobia). How do I convince myself to get back in there? As a graduate student, I need to eat and sleep- these things are increasingly difficult. I've received medication and abide by mindfulness techniques. But nothing seems to work. Any advice much appreciated, and even just reading this- I'm very grateful for you. B.
  13. Thank you jonathan123, I really appreciate the kind words. I look forward to spending time on here
  14. Hello all, Just want to say thank you for providing such a warm and thoughtful forum in discussing mental health. I was formerly an active member of anxietyzone.com before it was shut down, and for many years did not really have a place to go. I'm a doctoral student ironically studying clinical psychology- finding a means to express my emotions without judgment is difficult, given that most providers don't wish to deal with trainees in the field. This site seems warm and accepting. Looking forward to meeting you all!