trying 2 make friends!!

[SadWitch 15]

im trying my hardest 2 make some friends its just so hard!! i feel like they dont really like me!! my social anx makes it so hard 4 me!! i manage 2 go 2 town with 1 girl just hope she likes me!! xxx

[Gilly 1086]

Leo we like you, we love you. I know it's hard but try not to put too much pressure on yourself to please other people. You are sweet and kind and fun, all the things you look for in a friend. Just be yourself and you will make freinds.

[dynasty 14]

Find a job, It did wonders for me.

[JungleJulia 235]

Gilly is right, you just have to believe in yourself. Youre a great person Leo.

[SadWitch 15]

thanks guys xxx

[fortheo 15]

Like everyone said, just be yourself. If someone doesnt want to be your friend, thats their problem not yours.

[SadWitch 15]

thanks forth xxx

[shaun 6]

Just be yourself and be open about your problems. You might be surprised by people's reactions, I think most people will empathise and not judge you harshly. Being socially anxious doesn't mean you would be an inferior friend. Don't try to hide it, be honest.

[farrah 2]

I know its harder when we are older to make friends, but it really happens when we least expect it. Just relax and let it happen. I know it seems like forever, but good things come to those who wait. In the meantime you still have us.

[shaun 6]

Find a job, It did wonders for me.

Working is an excellent way to make new friends. Apart from my friends from school, I met most of my friends through the workplace. Of course, finding work can be daunting for some people but once you get a job you are much more likely to make new friends as you are meeting new people and your confidence will improve.

[Anonymous19 0]

Just be yourself and be open about your problems. You might be surprised by people's reactions, I think most people will empathise and not judge you harshly. Being socially anxious doesn't mean you would be an inferior friend. Don't try to hide it, be honest.

I agree completely. I was terrified to make friends because of my anxiety, but after I explained to the few that are around about it, they were perfectly okay. They started making plans that worked around it whether it be we all went to dinner late at night, or just stayed in and played video games. There are alot of open-minded people out there who will like you regardless. You just have to open up and find them!

[jonathan123 2368]

I tell you what! You find out who your friends really are when you suffer from anxiety. At first my 'friends' began to drop away until I was virtually friendless. Except for a few brave souls who were prepared to put up with me. Then, gradually, through groups of like minded people new friends began to appear. It was not until this happened that I realised how hollow the old one's were. A good description of a friend is someone who will hold your hand when you are in trouble; not ask questions but just be there. I have read some of your posts. Leopard, and I cannot imagine why you think you are not worthy to be a friend. This is another of those 'hidden' symptoms that we get with anxiety. A lack of self worth. Leopard, you are unique. We all are, and we are all worthy of love and attention. If some choose not to think so that is their problem and who would want them as friends anyway. As others have said, just be yourself and when you do friends will appear, believe me. From a friend. jonathan.

[SadWitch 15]

hi guys!! thanks 4 ur posts!! ur all so kind 2 me!! since iv posted this i have made a friend she is really good 2 me and understand my anxiety and my troubles she will do anythin she can 2 help me just thouht id let u know how i was getting on!! much love xxxx

[jonathan123 2368]

So glad to hear it, leo. There is an old maxim. If you find someone you really get on with and who understands and is prepared to take you as you are then cultivate that friendship. If, on the other hand, you find yourself uncomfortable in the presence of someone, and this applies to a therapist also, then don't bother. Your instinctive feeling is well developed in this illness; at least, I find it so, and first impressions can often be true. Hope you find more friends that you can get along with. Best wishes. J.

[SadWitch 15]

thanks hunni xxx

[taking.infinite.chances 0]

I believe in you. Just muster up some courage and project self confidence to those around you. You can do it, best of luck!

[SadWitch 15]

thanks t.i.c xxxx

[Laurence7 0]

This happens to me on a daily basis. I ALWAYS think everyone doest like me but after a drunk conversation with one of them it turns out they actually do and its all in my head! Im sure its the same for most of us

[jonathan123 2368]

Hi. Laurance. May I welcome you to the site. Why do you think everyone doesn't like you? Is it because you think so little of yourself? In anxiety we tend to 'knock ourselves down'. We do not think we are worth bothering with as we feel weak and inadequate. This is only a temporary affair and, when we recover we realise that it is all a big lie. Alcohol removes a lot of inhibitions and it may be that your friends open up more after a few drinks. You may be hearing the truth about yourself. They DO like you. It is always 'in the head': it's getting it out into the open that is important. Don't worry: I am sure you are a likeable person. There are only likeable people on this site!!!! Very best wishes.   J.

[34peter 0]

hi my name is peter i know how you feel i suffer with social phobia and had not been out of the house for 24 years i too am looking to make new friends hope to hear from you peter