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  1. I've always struggled with ocd and anxiety. I found over the years whenever something goes away something else pops up to take its place. Heart disease, kidney disease, cancers, end of the world, fear of dying itself, etc. I'm only 27 years old yet I feel like I'm out of time to change, to enjoy life. I feel like my clock has run out. A lot of things are changing for me which doesn't help but I know losing my father at 40 to heart disease plays a factor. I don't believe I'll get old and that terrifies me. My father did drugs, ate terribly and made a lot of bad decisions that lead to his passing but for some reason an ending is all I see for myself. Please I'm desperate for any and all advice.
  2. Hi all I am new here I have fought with anxiety mainly health anxiety and ocd for decades. I am on SSI because of it as well as outpatient. I have been married for 20 yrs. I am a mom of a 22 yr old and 16 yr old. very busy and active in our church but deep down I have been fighting since the 90's. & needless to say this new current event that's freaking everyone out is waking up every fear that I have. Jumping out of my sleep and all. really would be great to meet people who can relate. oh yea I am 44 from Philadelphia
  3. Dear Health Anxiety, I know you're trying to terrify me with thoughts of neuro-degenerative diseases, heart dysfunctions, and ovarian and/or cervical cancer based on my symptoms right now, but listen. I'm not going to consult "Doctor Google" for the foreseeable future. Hear me? No way, no how. Remember when we did this back in 2012 and I ended up believing my symptoms meant I had everything from ALS to a brain tumor to colon cancer? I even went to the hospital unemployed with just $100 to my name and was admitted for seven hours as I waited for results from five vials worth of various blood tests and a CT scan. And what was the diagnosis? Extreme health anxiety. The ER doctor even wrote me a script to get back on Fluoxetine, and they don't normally do that! (By the way, those unpaid medical bills are still on my credit report.) Instead, I will try to be at peace with the notion that despite what you insist, I actually feel mostly physically sound. And because I feel mostly physically sound (i.e., not in immediate danger), I will also try to accept that if anything serious actually is going on–such as DVT or MS or cancer or whathaveyou–it's already happening. And regardless of however terrified you try to make me, no amount of anxiety re: the possibilities will make me feel better OR make any health problems I may actually have go away. The only logical, helpful courses of action are to 1. schedule timely appointments with my various doctors and discuss my symptoms and concerns with them, and, 2. wait patiently for the appointments. Yes, yes, yes. I understand that Googling sometimes helps people find a diagnosis that their doctors miss. Yes, I completely get that you need reassurance, RIGHT NOW, on what the condition is/isn’t that my vague symptoms check off. Yes, I understand that some people do get the worst-case scenario too little too late. The funny thing is? I'm not a highly trained, knowledgeable, and experienced health professional. I didn't go to school to study the human body or its pathologies of diseases and conditions. (I went for Sociology... that degree that I'm not utilizing). AND I KNOW IT! I know I actually have little business seriously trying to reason, "ok, well symptoms 1+4.3+9+??? could probably... no, DEFINITELY = heart failure or cancer or neuro-degeneration." If you ever want to talk about Emile Durkheim's theory of social stratification or theories about Protestantism giving rise to Capitalist socio-economic structures, sure! Knock yourself out! But until then, please. Let's leave anything beyond run of the mill health issues to my doctors for now. However, I will thank you for doing what you thought was right. I know you ultimately mean me no harm, but what you're trying to make me feel right now is definitely NOT helping. Furthermore, the reassurance you think I'll get that will come with obsessively Googling symptoms and pathologies isn't going to help me either. In fact, I have years of experience that says it'll do the exact opposite: it’s ULTIMATELY NOT REASSURING TO SOMEONE WHO HAS A TENDENCY TO RUMINATE ON HEALTH PROBLEMS. (Yes, I also understand that it’s perfectly normal and healthy to be worry and scared. But it’s not normal to be petrified to the point where you can’t enjoy or live your life for weeks). So please. Just sit by and let me do my thing and my doctors their thing. I promise I'll acknowledge you, however, it won't be with charged reactions. It'll be more something like, "Oh hello there. I see you're back. I hear you loud and clear, and I know what you mean, but I'm not going to judge your words and am now going to let what you're saying float on by, now. If you're really adamant that I take you seriously, I've allotted some time later on for worrying. Meet me then!" Capiche? Best Regards, Me