Ihadcancer

If you could.......... would you? (off beat question)

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A little nostalgia: I was brought up mainly in Europe (with American family around) and that has turned me into a handshaker! Boy, was I in for a surprise when I moved to the South of the US and everyone (not literally) was a hugger! So different at first but it's the best, a good hug is the best! 

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Just wanted to hop in and say what an incredible thread this is. Lots of beautiful, honest emotion, communicated in such an intelligent and caring manner. Hugs to all.

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1 hour ago, jonathan123 said:

A hug can work wonders, although one must be discreet of course! But showing Love, not in a pushy ostentatious way, but in simple gestures and thoughts. My God, how the world needs it so badly!!!

Anyway, I'm in the mood for hugs, anyone??? Guys and all, I don't mind.

Jon, you sure about that? I might not let go LOL

Some days that is all I want, I just want a hug. I made a cushion from Stephens favourite tshirt. It's a comic book one of course, Captain Britain. I have to make do with that. I tried hugging the cats but they protest after a few minutes lol

 

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I live in a community dedicated to prayer and healing and in the office we have 'hug cards'. Anyone wanting a hug can take one and give it to anyone they would like a hug from. It works!!! Of course, you can't do it outside the community, it might be misunderstood!!  :fp:. But we get many visitors who are in trouble and the cards are much sought after. But what always surprises me is that so many have never been hugged and often feel embarrassed. Life without a hug?? No way!!

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2 hours ago, Pinky92 said:

Just wanted to hop in and say what an incredible thread this is. Lots of beautiful, honest emotion, communicated in such an intelligent and caring manner. Hugs to all.

Hugs to you!! 

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I've got to tell you about hugs.  I'm a hugger. I'm Southern Baptist and boy do we hug! 

Well, a deacon's wife at a previous church was not a very likable person and would hold her arm out to keep her children at arms length.  We were talking after AWANA one night and she told me that she didn't like to be touched even by her husband and wanted everyone to always be an arms length away from her personal space.  I said "OH KIM! That is so sad" and then I hugged her.  I mean a real, my heart is breaking for you HUG.  Then I realized what I'd done but I just let loose slowly and she just looked a bit shocked.  I didn't apologize because I'd honestly done it out of love and pity but I did remind myself from then on not to hug Kim.  

Jon,  I asked 'Why NOT me?'  I'm the ONLY one of my group who lived through 6 months of chemo.  A few weeks before my final treatment, I was alone in the room and realized out of 7 of us, only I remained alive.  In our church, I've had several friends get sick and die very quickly. They've all been younger than me.  My friend Dana has rectal cancer. She's in her late 40's and is actively dying. She was dx'd just over 2 years ago and has fought and taken every med and trial available. She's a wonderful Christian woman, mom, grandma.  Why me? Why am I alive? Why did God spare me and take these others?  I have survivor's guilt. I asked my precious preacher, Billy Godwin, 'Why am I alive and well and Dana is dying, Anita died,  Fray is dying?'  He said 'Evidently God spared you because He has something for you to do. Now it's your place to find out what that is and go do it'.   I believe my 'calling' is to help others who are ill or filled with fear. 
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 He said 'Evidently God spared you because He has something for you to do. Now it's your place to find out what that is and go do it'.    

A very wise man. THAT'S what I have been saying. It all has a purpose, but it's so difficult when in the midst of suffering to see any logic or reason in it. Now I have not had the experiences in REAL suffering that you and your friends have had, but mine has been and still is in my mind. Physical suffering is awful, but I sometimes wonder if mental suffering is even worse in a strange way. People who are physically ill can usually, (not always), be able to reason, but in anxiety logic and reason go out of the window.

I believe my 'calling' is to help others who are ill or filled with fear

Yes, I am sure it is. I had to leave a good job because of anxiety, but it led me to counselling which is what it was supposed to do. "God works in mysterious ways his wonders to perform". Trying to reason out 'why' is counter productive because, like the proverbial dog, we just chase our tails.'One day at a time Lord, one day at a time'. Why can't we just live in the NOW!? I find it so difficult because my mind wanders back and forth. Tomorrow! What will happen tomorrow? I have done Mindfulness and it helps, but not entirely. I live with a laid back wife and I will never cease thanking God for that blessing. When I had GAD she and two other people saved my life, literally. One was a lovely lady called Kay who was so wise and understanding, and my dear old Jungian therapist, who is no longer with us in the flesh but sure is in spirit.

"Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof". Christ's words make us realise that living in the moment is all we  can do. Tomorrow is gone.

"The moving finger writes and having writ moves on. Not all they piety or wit can remove one word of it".

Tomorrow? well, let God take care of that!

 

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