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[Ellebel 67]

Hello old and new friends!

I have not been here for a while. Last time i check in i was having some serious breastcancer fears while nursing my (very colicky) baby. It was a rough time. I ended up with my therapist for a new round of counselling because the sleep deprivation, baby that cried all the time AND weird symptoms just made my life so hard. I am back to check in with you guys. How are you doing? How are all the lockdown situations or covid- measures treating you?  Here it has been tough, but it did provide me with some unique one on one time with my baby, as i have been home for a year + due to covid. Trying to see the positive 😉 

Me being back here doesnt mean i have been better. On the contrary. I feel like i am going from one fear to another. Yesterday it was ALS again en now i am obsessing over a mole on my back. Oh well. C'est la vie!  Despite my fears i am trying to enjoy more. Life is short..  the longer you live, the shorter it will feel (or so im told), so i dont wat to waste away in fear. I am trying with some mindfullness and meditation. Any experience anyone?  It's not a huge succes yet, but hey every extra minute of peace and enjoyment is precious right?

I am especially curious how @Holls is doing?

Lots of love ❤️

 

Ellebel

[Ironman 198]

Welcome back,

You have to first look at what you have accomplished - and it is understandable that it would cause stress that could aggravate anxiety.  Anything can happen in that, so you can tell something is up.  If the mole is something you have had for a while, then nothing would just appear out of nowhere.  A mole itself is usually not cancerous, though.  The ALS fears are probably the muscle issues with stress and having a baby.  Your issues are likely tied to stress and not anything else. :) 

[jonathan123 2368]

Hi. Ellebell.  I remember you from old. Welcome back, and I am so sorry you are feeling stressed again. As you say, such is life. But it need not be so. Babies often pick up anxiety if their parents are anxious.  An anxiety 'atmosphere' can cause a baby to to be fractious and often cry a lot. Now this is not your fault, so get that idea out of your head. It's just how things are at the moment. I don't doubt you are a good mother in every respect. It's good you are having counselling again. There is no real substitute for good one to one counselling with someone you trust. Mindfulness is a good way to concentrate the mind. We don't do we? If we brush our teeth we are thinking about what we shall have for lunch!  As Buddhists say, when you walk, walk, When you sit, sit, but don't wobble. Concentrate on the task in hand. Meditation is also good in anxiety, but it can be difficult to keep one's mind on one thing when anxious. You will win through again. You have the right attitude. 

It's not a huge succes yet, but hey every extra minute of peace and enjoyment is precious right?

Yes, absolutely right. In anxiety we often appreciate the quiet times and the beauty of this world more than would a person not suffering. Anxiety people are sensitive people. They pick up negative feelings and emotions from others so easily. An argument of some form of altercation can upset them for days. That's why it's so important to try and live in a calm atmosphere, not always easy.

Good to have you back.. Best wishes.

 

 

[Ellebel 67]

So right Jonathan!  And yes baby picks up stress easily.. that is sometimes very conflicting as him crying causes more stress and so on haha. But i try breathing exercises and i feel like mindfullness and meditation are very helpful indeed! I also read a book that i found very helpful! Its about ACT therapy. Very helpful for me at least 😊. So yes still anxious and fallbacks, but also Enjoying and appreciating more😊.  How are you?

[Holls 1505]

On 4/29/2021 at 3:45 AM, Ellebel said:

Hello old and new friends!

I have not been here for a while. Last time i check in i was having some serious breastcancer fears while nursing my (very colicky) baby. It was a rough time. I ended up with my therapist for a new round of counselling because the sleep deprivation, baby that cried all the time AND weird symptoms just made my life so hard. I am back to check in with you guys. How are you doing? How are all the lockdown situations or covid- measures treating you?  Here it has been tough, but it did provide me with some unique one on one time with my baby, as i have been home for a year + due to covid. Trying to see the positive 😉 

Me being back here doesnt mean i have been better. On the contrary. I feel like i am going from one fear to another. Yesterday it was ALS again en now i am obsessing over a mole on my back. Oh well. C'est la vie!  Despite my fears i am trying to enjoy more. Life is short..  the longer you live, the shorter it will feel (or so im told), so i dont wat to waste away in fear. I am trying with some mindfullness and meditation. Any experience anyone?  It's not a huge succes yet, but hey every extra minute of peace and enjoyment is precious right?

I am especially curious how @Holls is doing?

Lots of love ❤️

 

Ellebel

Ellebel!!!! Just saw your notice. I don't get on hardly at all anymore. I'm doing well, I got a new job at the very start of the pandemic 🥺 it's been a wild, hard ride so most of my attention has been focused on that. Luckily it's part time and I work from home! 

I am sorry to hear that your worry is jumping from 1 thing right to another. Is it any wonder though with all that's been going on? Our minds always go to old worries when we are anxious hence that pesky als fear.  You have zero to worry about. Then throw in hormones after baby and I have to give you a pat on the back !!! You are doing an amazing job and your baby is so very lucky to have you as a momma. When the worries come in, pack your baby up in a wrap or stroller and take a brisk walk to clear the head. Your mind can run away with lies so fast.. don't let it. Biggest, warmest hugs. You are healthy and amazing! 💕💗💜🧡❤️💙

[jonathan123 2368]

Hi Ellabell. So sorry not to have got back before but I have only just read your last post. I am OK thank you. Apart from being thoroughly fed up with all this corvid business and getting vaccine jabs. I have had my two now so should be reasonably good. If anyone is hesitant about having the jabs I can only say that I felt nothing as they did it and with no after effects at all.  I know some do get them My neighbour had a mild dose of flu like symptoms but it soon went.  You have come a long way since the old days. Good for you. But you know all about setbacks. They do happen and we have to do what we always do, accept them as part of the recovery process.

It hardly seems possible that this site has been running for ten years. The help it has given to many, and it's ongoing support is a credit to all those involved in it's upkeep. It helped me enormously when I first came on and I will always be grateful to all you guys. Support is so important, and to know others suffer as we do is helpful.  Keep going Ellabell. You have always had the right attitude and that is important.  Very best wishes.

[jonathan123 2368]

Hi. Holls. It's good to see some of the old hands have not deserted us. You have made significant posts over the years and have helped me for one, and no doubt many more. We don't hear from Gilly anymore which is a pity. She also was such a help. Time goes by so fast and people come and go. Anxiety will and is becoming a major problem in most countries. We have yet to see the full impact yet. Being isolated for so long has affected so many people. Now take care, and very best wishes to you. Good to see you again. 

[Holls 1505]

17 hours ago, jonathan123 said:

Hi. Holls. It's good to see some of the old hands have not deserted us. You have made significant posts over the years and have helped me for one, and no doubt many more. We don't hear from Gilly anymore which is a pity. She also was such a help. Time goes by so fast and people come and go. Anxiety will and is becoming a major problem in most countries. We have yet to see the full impact yet. Being isolated for so long has affected so many people. Now take care, and very best wishes to you. Good to see you again. 

Yes it's so good to see you here too. You helped me so so much! I remember sitting by my Christmas tree one year and you really helped me take a hard look at my worry and I finally put it away and enjoyed Christmas with my kids instead of worrying. So thank you so so much! You do great work here. 💜💜💜

[Doug97 19]

On 4/29/2021 at 9:45 AM, Ellebel said:

I am trying with some mindfullness and meditation. Any experience anyone?  

Yes I find it very helpful, as long as I do it properly. Unfortunately that's impossible if the anxiety is too high! I've read a few books about mindfulness/Buddhism and the general attitude it tries to cultivate is a good one I think. But it takes quite a bit of discipline and dedication, you have to really work at it; something I've been failing at lately. 

How are you getting on with it?