Life is Spiraling

[Wingnut 13]

Hey everyone. About 1 year ago I moved from noisy/overcrowded Florida to South Carolina for a wonderful job opportunity. However, the past few months have been extremely rough for me. It started with going into work and being so exhausted I would almost collapse while sitting at my desk. I tried to sleep more but this did not help. A month went by as I struggled through work, and physical symptoms started to appear. I would never feel "well", and started to take off half days of work. 1 month later I was missing full days and half days in the same week....

Amidst all of this, my anxiety over the Coronavirus has been extremely high. My employer has offered me two weeks off to "reset" myself (Im also being paid), and is paying for me to see a counselor. I will admit I havent been consistent with my meds as my sleep schedule is horrific now. Most nights I dont fall asleep until 3am....Im just so lost. I dont know what to do or where to go or how to "get better". If I dont get better, I lose my job and end up being in an even worse position. I dont know whether to just sit and cry or go sit by a lake with a fishing pole...?

Any advice or encouragement would be comforting. 😞

 

Edit: I placed this into Hypochondria as my main fears are being ill, getting sick, etc. 

[Holls 1505]

1 hour ago, Wingnut said:

Hey everyone. About 1 year ago I moved from noisy/overcrowded Florida to South Carolina for a wonderful job opportunity. However, the past few months have been extremely rough for me. It started with going into work and being so exhausted I would almost collapse while sitting at my desk. I tried to sleep more but this did not help. A month went by as I struggled through work, and physical symptoms started to appear. I would never feel "well", and started to take off half days of work. 1 month later I was missing full days and half days in the same week....

Amidst all of this, my anxiety over the Coronavirus has been extremely high. My employer has offered me two weeks off to "reset" myself (Im also being paid), and is paying for me to see a counselor. I will admit I havent been consistent with my meds as my sleep schedule is horrific now. Most nights I dont fall asleep until 3am....Im just so lost. I dont know what to do or where to go or how to "get better". If I dont get better, I lose my job and end up being in an even worse position. I dont know whether to just sit and cry or go sit by a lake with a fishing pole...?

Any advice or encouragement would be comforting. 😞

 

Edit: I placed this into Hypochondria as my main fears are being ill, getting sick, etc. 

I do talk therapy. You should try that maybe start twice a week then tapper down. I do mine once every two weeks now. I also feel lost Bec my schedule is all over the place..you aren't alone. My therapist said that's expected right now. 

As far as your job. I just started a part time bookkeeping job before all of this started. I've started using my job as a break from any virus worries. Once I get on my computer I just focus on work only. You are very fortunate to have a job right now plus have them let you take some time off... So I would definitely give it your all when you go back. 

I really think the therapist will help you so much. I like hearing how even my therapist is floundering right now. I thought I was the only one..

Hugs. Hope you feel better soon..just know you aren't alone and your feeling a are valid. 

[jonathan123 2368]

Hi. Wingnut.  You have got yourself into the old cycle of 'Fear/anxiety/symptoms/fear. It's a cycle you may well know about. Exhaustion is one of its many symptoms. We expend so much energy in 'What Iffs' and 'OMG's' that at times we are so tired we can hardly move. Our motivation goes too. The 'get up and go' got up and went!!  You 'tried to sleep'. The more you try the more awake you become. It's a viscous circle. Yes, you can cry and go fishing, but it goes deeper that mere distractions. You may have seen your GP, if not you should. You may need SHORT TERM medication to help you through this difficult phase. If you don't want medication then, as Holls says, counselling could help. If you can get it. I don't know the postion of getting counselling in the States. Another and much tried way is to get Dr. Weeke's book 'Essential help for your Nerves' available on Amazon.

She was an authority on anxiety. She advocates ACCEPTANCE. This means no fighting 'IT'. No struggling with 'IT'. It's a battle you can never win. The more you fight 'IT' the more adrenaline you produce and the more symptoms there will be. You have turned your mind into a battleground. You can't ignore it, that's silly, but you can accept it. It's not easy when it frightens you every day. When you wake up in dread of another day. When you awake in the mornings your metabolic rate, the rate you use energy, is low. It is with all of us. It sets the template for the day. If you awake and think 'how awful, another day' then that's how the day will be. I am NOT minimising your condition. God knows, been there. TRY, I say try because it's not easy, try and accept that all the symptoms are those of anxiety, full stop. They are the result of continued fear. There is nothing abnormal or 'odd' about you. Anxiety breeds on fear. It must, and the only fuel it has is fear. Don't feed it.   Very best wishes.  Take it easy. Be kind to yourself.     

[MARC 431]

Ben Carson has said that 98 percent of people with the Coronavirus recover.