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The biggest problem with Google is the future. When you finally decide you want to stop and want to concentrate on getting better, you realise its very difficult to 'un-learn' all the previous infomation youve looked up over the years. It sticks with you, but its like chinese wispers, where youre not sure if youve remembered the information, but you cant look it up without fuelling you HA again. Not Googling is the best way to go. Think of stopping GOOGLING early as making the recovery from HA easier in the longrun. The more you google, the longer your HA will stick around.

Thinking your heartburn is c***** and your leg prob is a neurological disorder is Health Anxiety and not Illness Phobia. Illness Phobia is more a fear 'of' the illness, and not of having it. Ilness Phobia is more the fear of a certain diease or illness in its own right. To believe you could possibly have that disease, is not illness phobia. Its health anxiety. A person with Illness Phobia might be afraid of getting near people who have a certain disease, contagious or not. It is the illness they fear... not necessarily having the illness. Whereas health anxiety is generally the other way around. They are not afraid of the illness or people who have it, they are afraid of having it themselves.

Youve probably heard my story before, but ill tell it for the benefit of those who havent. My mum died of c***** in June 2008. In November 2008 we went away to scotland to scatter her ashes. I was feeling fragile. As I came home and put my keys in the door, I saw a letter. I opened it. My smear test results showed an abnormality. I didnt understand what it was about as the docturs never really told me much. From the Cervical c***** Booklet etc that theyd put in with the letter, I presumed it meant I had c*****, or was likely to develop it shortly. I lost the plot. I freaked out day and night. I got some reassurance from the doctors but the panic had already set in. Over a period of 6 weeks, of no sleep and checkin my body in case I saw disease, I reached a point where I had drained my iron stores with my high anxiety levels. The whites of my eyes began turning blue, my hair started turning white in places and thinning out, I was getting aches and pains everywhere. I was so dizzy all the time and I started coming down with chest infections, sinus infections, then I went on to get an inner ear infections, and a UTI. I felt awful. I convinced myself because of the iron deficiency I had (which at that point I was unaware of) that I was suffering the same fate as my mum. I thought I had c*****, or kidney failure, AIDS.... and so on. I got to a point where it had been so long without respite that I had to try and regain control. I had been seeing a doctor twice a week panicking, or going to walk-in centres, or calling NHS Direct on the other days. So, enough was enough. I had a whole bunch of tests done. Full Blood Count. Thyroid, B12, Kidney, Diabetes, CHlamidia, STD's, HIV..... I tested for everything I could. Everything came back fine. I developed Ectopic beats and had to have ECG's. Everything still fine. Eventually, after the first year, I managed to get CBT. I attended and finished the course. It helped me a lot. Thanks to CBT I can control my panic now.... but that does not mean I no longer panic... oh no. I panic a lot.... I just stop it from going off the scale, because I know that will make me even worse, like it did before with the Iron Deficiency. It is now four years since it all started. In that time I have seen doctors for concerns regarding my heart, lung c*****, throat c*****, ear infections (i had labyrinthitis), sinus problems, allergies, jaundice, skin c*****, kidney failure, breast c***** (had to see a specialist and have an ultrasound to reassure me), oral c*****, thyroid, acid reflux, bladder infections, bowel issues, loss of sense of smell, lumps in my abdomen, swollen joints, sleeping difficulties.... you name it, Ive feared Ive had it. My health anxiety has always been termed a 'Bereavement Issue' from losing my mum... but I am no longer sensitive to the fact I lost my mum, so why cant I get closure with the health anxiety? Ive had four years now of sleeping usually, no more than 2 hours a night. Having mid-night panic attacks on a frequent basis... and now I have digestive issues. As much as I try, my health anxiety refuses to leave. It shouldnt have happened like it did. I wish Id coped better... maybe I wouldnt be like this now. Im trying to get more CBT but Ive done two self referrals now.... and heard nothing. Life is still getting progressively harder.... and I dont know how to change it.

Yes, there is such a thing, its actually called 'Illness Phobia'. Health Anxiety, it is worth noting, is to a certain extent, a form of OCD, if you are the type that has 'checking processes' to look for signs of disease. Illness Phobia is a fear of getting sick. Health Anxiety is a fear that you ARE sick. The differernce is subtle.

oooh why thank you very much. my dad was the one who sent it to me. he's good like that now ive trained him. hahaa

Ok, so we know anxiety and sleep problems go hand in hand. Have any of you developed any techniques or do any of you have any suggestions as to how to make sleeping easier? I know for me that bedtime is like Silent Hill when the air raid sounds and the world turns evil and is full of nasty monsters. If I listen to music, I have to have it so its almost inaudible, so that I have to concentrate to hear it. The concentration alone makes me sleepy. For those of you who feel vulnerable in the dark and have a TV/DVD player in your bedroom, you can use a similar technique for this. Pick a movie you have seen a hundred times over, and put it on. Turn out the lights. Change the brightness and contrast settings so that the picture is really dark. Enough to make out the images... just... but bright enough to light up the room so you can see everything around you, but not as harshly as using a light. Then dip the volume down until you can just hear what they are saying. Lie in bed and just listen to the dialogue. You wont want to watch it because youve seen it loads of times, but you feel inclined to give in to the distraction. The subtle mumble of voices coupled with the low lighting and your need to concentrate to hear it, will likely send you off to sleep. You can test how well it works, by seeing in the morning the last point in the movie you remembered having on. It may not work for everyone, but it certainly works for me... so who knows, if Im not mad, it might work for someone else too. Its definitely better than sleeping with the lights off in silence. What do you do?

Hello everyone, I just thought Id give you a quick link to an interesting programme I just listened to. Its all about Health Anxiety, how the doctors diagnose the condition, the affects on the sufferer, the help available, and a whole load of info on how the disorder manifests. I found it very informative, and potentially a great programme for those of you who suffer from Health Anxiety to play to family or friends, to help them understand the nature of the psychological/emotional disorder. Its only 30 minutes long, so give it a go: http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00rbkyk Naomi x

Getting me dates mixed up. I was actually 27 when my depression finished. Back then I was a bit clueless about most things. I was drugged up to my eyeballs on antidepressants. Id been in and out of therapy. I suffered from Neurotic Reactive Depression. It meant because of my defensive attitute I used to argue with anyone and everyone. In 2005 my mum was diagnosed with a serious illness and my family fell apart. Someone had to be head of the household. I had no time for depression anymore. I felt my mum was more important regardless of how I felt. Thats when I decided to become a better person so I less reasons to hate myself. As I changed, my world changed with me. I have not experienced any form of depression in the last 7 years... but I still have the health anxiety and social anxiety. Swings and roundabouts as they say. x

I suffered from clinical depression from early childhood until I was 24. The hardest point for me was my defeatest attitude. I was so used to my life not working out for me, that i convinced myself nobody could ever help me and my life could never change. My sleeping patters went all over the place, often sleeping for 16 hours at a time. The worst part of depression is feeling you are fighting a one man battle... without any weapons. Forunately, with the aid of sites like this, none of us have to feel alone anymore. Thank goodness for the internet.

I used to have something similar with that when I used to have Depression. I found that as soon as it changed to evening I felt defeated by the fact depression had stolen another day from my life and depressed by the fact it was likely to be the same again tomorrow. So I can empathise with how you feel x