ClosedAlpha

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About ClosedAlpha

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  • Birthday 12/20/1991

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  1. During the latter Spring and entire Summer, I find myself at my most peaceful. Viruses that spread seem to frequent the colder seasons and the holidays/events, which in turn tends to exacerbate the dispersal of those viruses. It's not the trivial colds that frighten me, but the ones that use my emetophobia to bring me to my knees. If someone gets sick, even if it is in an entirely different state on the opposite coast I find myself in a state of panic just by the thought. Lately I have entered a state of introspection that leads me to believe that due to this phobia, among other things, I am a burden to the close few around me. I pushed off seeing my girlfriend of several years by 2 weeks because her household has fell victim to what would clearly immobilize me in both senses. It has planted the thought in my head that she deserves better than someone like me, who would quarantine her for being ill out of pure fear and void of logic. I suppose the purpose of me posting this is to see if others have had similar feelings or situations, or could even offer advice to cope with this madness. It is slowly eating away at me and making life incredibly difficult.