Being Touched by Strangers

[wiredinsomniac 0]

I cannot stand being touched in any form by strangers. Once I was at work and a lady tucked my tag, innocent, huh, well it sent my anxiety through the roof and I had to go home and stay in bed for the next two days. I cannot go in areas where there is people crowded up tight in a bunch. This is really making life hard for my family because they can't spontaneously say hey lets go because I have to know in advance or I won't go. What has your experience been with things like that?

[difrancprod 3]

I am only uncomfortable when total strangers with a threatening vibe approach or touch me. What I do is just really be keen and have my discernment for people be open. I do believe that not all people intentionally hurt us so I guess, it's okay to also be open.

[JungleJulia 235]

I am not generally bothered by strangers touching me but there are two instances where it does give me sort of a rush of irritation, but I recover from it within a minute or two. The first is the tag tucking thing! Even if its someone i know, someone randomly touching the back of my neck feels horrible. I don't even understand why people do it, who cares if someone's tag is out? The second one that sometimes bugs me is when im at a shop and the cashier is handing me change and instead of dropping it into my hand, their hand touches mine. That hand touch bothers me too haha. I never thought of it as an anxiety thing, clearly yours bothers you a lot more. 2 day recovery is what I get after major stress eg going out for a big day.

[Esperahol 0]

Can you explain why this sets you off? Perhaps if you were able to reason through it you'd be better able to deal with it. Fighting panic with logic is usually the way to go.

[shaun 6]

I don't mind being touched by strangers, inadvertent touching is not a problem. When I travel on the tube I am often squished and touching lots of strangers, I don't like being constricted, but contact with other people doesn't bother me.

Can you trace back to where your fear of being touched by strangers comes from?

[panicstricken 4]

I have this also I don't like to shake hands at a job interview. I don't know why people are still doing that it really annoys me. What about the people who pat you on the back? I want to hit these people in the face, and say don't touch me. Some people act like they know you, when they really don't have a clue what you've been through.

[ValerieAnne 0]

I also don't like being touched by strangers. I don't shake hands with strangers either.

[Mystique 1]

I don't like being in a tube or a crowded place where my skin touches another person. I think it is because there are too many people that I do not know. When it comes to shaking hands, I'm fine with it. That is because most hands that I shake are people I already know or a first-time meeting with someone that I have engaged in prior to phone calls/emails (examples: lawyers, friends of a friend etc).

[Twinks* 16]

I am not generally bothered by strangers touching me but there are two instances where it does give me sort of a rush of irritation, but I recover from it within a minute or two. The first is the tag tucking thing! Even if its someone i know, someone randomly touching the back of my neck feels horrible. I don't even understand why people do it, who cares if someone's tag is out? The second one that sometimes bugs me is when im at a shop and the cashier is handing me change and instead of dropping it into my hand, their hand touches mine. That hand touch bothers me too haha. I never thought of it as an anxiety thing, clearly yours bothers you a lot more. 2 day recovery is what I get after major stress eg going out for a big day.

JJ,

I do the same with the change in the cashiers hand...I HATE when their hand touches mine. I have baby wipes in my car to wipe after . I also have a huge problem with kissing someone on the cheek as a hello or goodbye..

[JungleJulia 235]

Oooh baby wipes is clever! I normally just kind of shiver and wipe my hand down my leg lol. I'm also not a fan of kissing hello and goodbye but I do it if people do it to me. I wonder if this topic is more of a mild OCD type thing..

[Mrs. Rogers 2]

I'm not generally bothered by it other than thinking to myself, I wouldn't dare tuck in someone's tag! I don't like a stranger touching me at all, and I think my biggest pet peeve with strangers is when I'm checking out at a store and the person behind me is suddenly all up in my personal space. I've been known to hold my arms completely out and bump people and let them know they're all up in my area.

[chloetb 0]

Sometimes I find that the best way to deal with, or even over come this, is to think back throughout your life. There you may be able to locate a time, or an association that may be the source of this fear. This is not necessarily something negative that drives you away from contact, but can, on the other hand, be a very positive association with human contact that is restricted to one part of your life and remains representative of that. Anything else beyond that one time merely seems out of place.

[kingusama92 0]

There are some places where this type of reaction can become heightened. A packed bus is an example.

A stranger touching you is very uncommon, so I can understand why you were alarmed. At most, we see someone shake our hand, The tucking in of the tag was obviously a bit above and beyond, although it was innocent.

Best way to handle it is consider all of the times in your life where such contact was not a bad thing. Consider those memories and remmeber them for the positivity they brought to you.

[Chryss 0]

I can't stand being touched or kissed by anyone I'm not married to. There are situations where it's unavoidable, like buses etc., but the stress of being touched and the effort to "act normal" is absolutely exhausting. That means that I arrive at work already exhausted. I try to get some alone time at lunch but that can offend people who don't understand and think I'm stuck-up or something.

Once I worked in an office where the females took over the conference room at lunch time on the day when the new Cosmo came out. My name was mud when I didn't go, and they asked me twice and I said I needed a walk. They didn't accept it. The thing is, a crowded conference room is pretty much the same as a crowded bus, except everybody's sitting. But it's rubbing shoulders, reaching out across each other, and even patting the person next to you.

Do you remember that man on TV who wanted everybody to hug everybody else? Buscaglia? Some name like that. I honestly think he was one of the most dangerous people on earth. Imagine me coming along just shattered after a subway ride, and this guy hugs me. Or somebody who watched his TV show hugs me. That should be punishable under law.

[tajnz 0]

I'm strange. I'm perfectly fine with being touched by strangers in some scenarios and then on the flipside extremely bothered by touch in others.

For example if a stranger taps me on the arm or shoulder to tell me something I don't mind. The same goes for shop assistants. However if someone barges into me or walks too close when there is plenty of room then I feel uneasy. I definitely like my own safe and sometimes feel panicky when people don't have respect for it.