Looks like my worst fears are materialising

[Ryn079 9]

Good evening everyone. Went to doc as I had to re test for some blood in urine and some level of anemia.

Blood is still in urine, same mount, but doc asked for an ESR test which came up to 120.

So now I am being referred to a urologist and a general physician for more tests to see what's casing the high ESR.

I'm a mess and think this will be the beginning of the end.

[MARC 425]

Anemia can cause elevated ESR levels. 

[Ryn079 9]

I'm in a very bad place, trying to stay sane. Doc told me not to worry......I don't know how. 

It's freaking me out as I have no big pains, only the usual hypochondria aches.

[Ironman 138]

17 hours ago, Ryn079 said:

I'm in a very bad place, trying to stay sane. Doc told me not to worry......I don't know how. 

It's freaking me out as I have no big pains, only the usual hypochondria aches.

Part of that may be the anemia.  Really, it's just a path to find for health.  Anemia isn't all that rare.  If he was worried, you wouldn't be typing; you would be in the hospital connected to machines.  Anemia just means you have a deficiency somewhere and the doctor is trying to find out where it is so he can restore that area.

[Ryn079 9]

I'm freaking out, I have no pain anywhere, I'm not fatigued I feel just fine.  I have only been very stressed since Dec 21, with lack of sleep, high hypochondria and what seems to me depression, also very low appetite and nausea due to reflux and constant worries.

Tomorrow, I'm going back to doc maybe I can get some valium until I get to the first specialist which will be end of next week.

 

 

[Ironman 138]

7 hours ago, Ryn079 said:

I'm freaking out, I have no pain anywhere, I'm not fatigued I feel just fine.  I have only been very stressed since Dec 21, with lack of sleep, high hypochondria and what seems to me depression, also very low appetite and nausea due to reflux and constant worries.

Tomorrow, I'm going back to doc maybe I can get some valium until I get to the first specialist which will be end of next week.

 

 

You shouldn't be freaking out.  Anemia means you are just deficient in something and the doctor is trying to figure it out.

The rest you are putting on yourself.  The hypochondria is fueling the anxiety, whic is the rest of what you are dealing with.

Remember, how you think determines how you feel.

[Ryn079 9]

Went to doctor as I am super anxious and asked for some calming pills and I was given sedoxil.

He explained to me that the anemia could be from me loosing blood internally so they wanted to check from where.

I am super freaked out.

[Ironman 138]

16 minutes ago, Ryn079 said:

Went to doctor as I am super anxious and asked for some calming pills and I was given sedoxil.

He explained to me that the anemia could be from me loosing blood internally so they wanted to check from where.

I am super freaked out.

The unknown will do that.   Remember that if it was totally urgent, you'd be in the hospital right now.  

If it was in the urine, think backwards to the urethra, and the kidneys.  Kidney stones can cause it, which would lead to pain where they would have to blow them up like a video game. 

That's speculation.  If you were going to go, he would have told you so.

I think you are going to live through this :).

[Ryn079 9]

Thanks for your kind words @Ironman.

AS I said, I have no major pains, I am not loosing weight, and I feel quite ok, but I still think that there is something extremely wrong with me, and I need to get a coffin.

 

[Ironman 138]

6 hours ago, Ryn079 said:

Thanks for your kind words @Ironman.

AS I said, I have no major pains, I am not loosing weight, and I feel quite ok, but I still think that there is something extremely wrong with me, and I need to get a coffin.

 

Not a coffin, just a comfortable to bed to RELAX in.  You're fine main system wise, you just have a service engine soon alert.  The doctors would be able to point it out pretty quick.  You're not going to die :).

[Ryn079 9]

As Friday is approaching, and I have to visit the first specialist, all I am experiencing is an impeding sense of doom, thinking to myself that I will not be here in a year's time as I will be dead. Still no real pain, some lower back soreness and tingling toes when I wake up.

 

I also crashed my car today, was thinking about how doc will find something worrying when I visit him.

[Ryn079 9]

Went to the general physician today. He examined me and couldn't find anything wrong.  So he is proposing a CT scan and more blood work.  From my previous blood work he said that things started about 8 months ago.  But with the physical exam, he couldn't find anything wrong.

So the search continues......whilst I despair.

[Ironman 138]

On 9/30/2022 at 12:37 PM, Ryn079 said:

Went to the general physician today. He examined me and couldn't find anything wrong.  So he is proposing a CT scan and more blood work.  From my previous blood work he said that things started about 8 months ago.  But with the physical exam, he couldn't find anything wrong.

So the search continues......whilst I despair.

Eight months and nothing got any worse.  It wouldn't sound as bad.  He wasn't concerned.

[Ryn079 9]

To be honest I took blood samples today, some of which will be sent abroad. I feel like shit, apologies for my language.

Nurse said that haemoglobin count isn't too low. But I still had problems with esr.

I just hope it's not the end of me, I'm ready to die but my kids.....I can't picture them growing up without me.  My youngest is only 9 and she is my princess.

[Ironman 138]

2 hours ago, Ryn079 said:

To be honest I took blood samples today, some of which will be sent abroad. I feel like shit, apologies for my language.

Nurse said that haemoglobin count isn't too low. But I still had problems with esr.

I just hope it's not the end of me, I'm ready to die but my kids.....I can't picture them growing up without me.  My youngest is only 9 and she is my princess.

It's not the end of you.  They are just trying to pinpoint where it is from. 

[Ryn079 9]

Esr and crp still high. Was admitted to hospital.

[Ironman 138]

4 hours ago, Ryn079 said:

Esr and crp still high. Was admitted to hospital.

The levels are elevated due to inflammation somewhere.  They will try and pinpoint the cause.

[MARC 425]

Good luck and I hope you feel better soon. Please let us know how you are doing. 

[Ryn079 9]

Just an update. Let's start by saying I'm a mess, crying most of the times when I am alone, not working as I just want to sleep.

Admitted to hospital last Tuesday. They ran a ton of blood work, physical examinations and chest x-ray.  All was fine, except esr and crp and haemoglobin a bit low. Was discharged on Wednesday. Have blood work, endoscopy and gastroscopy on Thursday, then CT scan the week after.  A lot of cancers were excluded but they still can't find the inflammation.

 

 

[MARC 425]

I am glad they have found nothing. I have had a few times in my life when I thought I was a goner. Once I went to the bathroom and when I wiped the whole tissue was drenched in red blood and the toilet bowl was all red. Another time I had a pain in my back every time I ate food and it felt like my back was on fire. I was dizzy every day for 6 weeks a number of years ago too. In June 2021, I began to vomit out of nowhere and I lost 10 pounds in one day. I ended up in the ER and also had abdominal pain which radiated to my back. A friend of mine urinated bright red blood for a week straight. In all of the previous examples, everything tuned out OK in the end and so will you. Please keep us updated and good luck too. 

[Ironman 138]

8 hours ago, Ryn079 said:

Just an update. Let's start by saying I'm a mess, crying most of the times when I am alone, not working as I just want to sleep.

Admitted to hospital last Tuesday. They ran a ton of blood work, physical examinations and chest x-ray.  All was fine, except esr and crp and haemoglobin a bit low. Was discharged on Wednesday. Have blood work, endoscopy and gastroscopy on Thursday, then CT scan the week after.  A lot of cancers were excluded but they still can't find the inflammation.

 

 

You have to take that knowledge with you.  It wasn't nearly as bad as you thought.

[Ryn079 9]

After a number of tests, including blood, chest x-ray, endoscopy, gastroenteroscopy and CT scan, an 8cm lump was found on my kidney.  Kidney will be removed in the coming month.

I have no words. I just feel like this is a very bad dream. I have no idea what to do, if I will live through it, etc.

I just know I'm a mess.

[Ironman 138]

43 minutes ago, Ryn079 said:

After a number of tests, including blood, chest x-ray, endoscopy, gastroenteroscopy and CT scan, an 8cm lump was found on my kidney.  Kidney will be removed in the coming month.

I have no words. I just feel like this is a very bad dream. I have no idea what to do, if I will live through it, etc.

I just know I'm a mess.

You will live through this, for sure.  You aren't the only person this has ever happned to.

DId they say anything about a possible transplant or if the lump is malignant?  

You still have a kidney, though - the doctors will know what to do.  

Please keep us updated - you will make it through this!

[MARC 425]

My former boss many years ago had a malignant tumor on one of his kidneys and had his one kidney removed, and he functioned fine after that with one kidney. A friend of mine growing up had one kidney removed and he is alive, and fine many years later. Many people live with one kidney and the body can function normally with one kidney. Please keep us updated and I wish you the best of luck and I am sure you will get through this OK. 

[Ryn079 9]

@MARC and @Ironman thanks a lot for your kind words.  

I'm a mess. I can't understand why this happened to me. I don't drink, don't smoke and don't eat rubbish. 

 

I just can't understand why...