davide.h

Christmas alone

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Just want to die or at least stop hurting. I don't know if I can live another year like this. 

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I would get together with some family or friends so you won't feel alone. 

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Even if it is a phone call, talk to someone.

Depression among us is already high with the Corona pandemic. 

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I shall be alone this Christmas. My wife died three years ago so this time of year has little meaning for me. But being alone is good, for me anyway. I shall hardly watch any TV. I shall continue with my hobby of model ship building. My ex neighbours are bringing me a Christmas meal. They won't stay because of covid. I appreciate that act of kindness very much. But I am warm, well fed and have a good home, for which I thank God. So many don't have this, and our prayers go out to them. May I wish everyone on here a better New Year. The old one is nearly gone, and the new one could be full of hope. So many still suffer the misery of anxiety, but hope is always there. Maybe difficult to find at times, but it never goes away entirely. 

Blessings to all. 

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Sometimes being alone is better than being with someone who treats you poorly. I know someone who is 73 and his wife is 58. He is from the USA and she is from South America. They have been married for around 15 years. He met her online. If he does something she does not like, she lets him have it. I have seen him have black eyes, bruises, etc. I asked him why do you stay with her? He tells me he had been alone before he met her and he would rather stay married, then be alone. She verbally abuses him too and he is afraid of his own shadow. I personally think he is an idiot, but to each his own. He is better off being alone. 

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There was a recent study that came out that stated being single can be more beneficial to your health than being married, which contradicts prior studies. 

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On 12/25/2021 at 6:10 PM, MARC said:

Sometimes being alone is better than being with someone who treats you poorly. I know someone who is 73 and his wife is 58. He is from the USA and she is from South America. They have been married for around 15 years. He met her online. If he does something she does not like, she lets him have it. I have seen him have black eyes, bruises, etc. I asked him why do you stay with her? He tells me he had been alone before he met her and he would rather stay married, then be alone. She verbally abuses him too and he is afraid of his own shadow. I personally think he is an idiot, but to each his own. He is better off being alone. 

It's strange how so many find some sort of security in a dysfunctional household. The book 'I'm OK. your'e OK' gives many examples of this. Any relationship should be on an equal basis. Adult to adult. But some men will find  peace in a dominant wife. If he is happy being dominated then who is to say it's wrong?  My old counsellor once said to me that relationships are one of the most difficult things for humans to relate to. And I believe he was right.

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I know another person who is in a long-term marriage. He is 70 and his wife is 65. Both were born in the USA and have been married around 35 years or so. The man has told me that he has not had sex with his wife in a very long time. He says she belittles him when he is home and she spends tons of money on shopping. There 2 kids are grown and out of the house. He has no money and can only eat 2 meals a day because of her spending. I know another man who is 46 and his wife is 44. They have 3 or 4 kids. They sleep in different bedrooms and he has not had sex with her is a while. She too belittles him and blames him for everything. She also gives him the silent treatment quite a bit. Now, in my opinion, you are better off being alone then in these situations. 

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