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Hi. 42yr old female,Had my first full on panic attack around 98-99.Dry mouth,heart palpitations,felt faint.Went to docs and they sent me to therapists.They gave me diff.meds to try to no avail.The one that actually did work gave me horrible head aches.(I refused meds for the longest for fear it would make it worse) Finally did some natural things (soaks and herbal remedies) and my anxiety went away.(said my serotonin was low)It was so far back I can't remember what things I did Recently,anxiety has shown up, out of the blue.Complete dread and doom in my head. Can't even watch tv,if it is negative. All that seems to help is crying and that is short lived.I finally went to the doc.and again with the meds.lexapro this time .I took it today,crying the entire time,cause I don't want to be medically dependant.I have a major all over headache and jaws hurt and heart palpitations. I woke up last night drenched in sweat and had the icy hot feel on my chest,stomach,arms and hands,so I couldn't sleep.Running on 3 hrs. Anyone treat naturally and rid themselves of anxiety?for good?

Hi. I just wanted to post saying hi. I'm new here. I'm 23, from canada. I have severe social anxiety. I have dealt with it since i was 17 I guess. The hardest thing for me is keeping a job. It's scary thinking of going to a job 8 hours a day 5 days a week and acting like it isnt torture. I would rather stay home and be alone. I honestly don't know what I will do with my life. I have a boyfriend of 2 years and i want a marriage and babies, and I honestly never see that happening. I don't think I will ever be able to give him these things. but anyway.. a little about me: I'm a big video game , horror movie, anime and superhero nerd. Anyway yeah. (:

Hi, I come from Macedonia and I dont have any support group for my problems, mainly agoraphobia and panic attack. I am willing to believe that guys here would help me to set my life in order. Maybe its late, because I am 30 yo, and have no job or girlfriend. No future for me from this perspective.

I am a self-diagnosed OCD with Asperger's and I suffer from anxiety attacks. I first discovered something wrong with my mind when I was a Freshman in college. My first video game that I had doubting issues with was Call of Duty Black Ops. I got it for Christmas, and at some point within my Sophomore year, I began doubting that this was even my game. As a result, I put off playing it for several months, because if I played it, I would get a nasty, anxious reaction in my stomach, feeling as if it wasn't even mine at all, making it impossible for me to enjoy the game. This has happened to my other video games as well, and same story. I had these thoughts of some people I know, like my father, and I get voices in my head telling me that it's "my game"("his" game, "their" game, when in reality, it is my game. I do feel sheepish for posting this to be honest(you know, the "my game" part), but this is when I had first noticed an OCD type of problem, but the worst has yet to come. Two years later, I became a Junior in college, and this is when I began experiencing some core traits of OCD. It was on one day, when I was arriving at work at the Tinley Park Campus for my college(though I'm not working there this year because Financial Aid had said that me and my father had taken out a bunch of loans, which prevents me from working there because it was "over budget."), and I began having sexual thoughts of my coworker Ben(really nice guy, but has graduated), and they were unwanted. I continued having these types of thoughts for awhile, and later on had sexual thoughts of some women I knew, including my mother. I thought I was sexually deviant, and it made me feel uncomfortable. The sexual nightmares do not end here, as I also thought that I was becoming gay, and that I would turn into something so evil: a pedophile! D: Even as I am posting this, I feel a little sad just thinking about how I thought and feared that I could turn into such an evil person. But that does not all end here, as I also had some thoughts about having sex with God, which I DID NOT WANT TO DO!!! Then, I get blasphemous thoughts of me cursing God at the top of my lungs while in hell!!! I thought that saying something like that would get me to hell, and I thought that I would have to be good in order to avoid going to hell. I'm a saved man, and I have accepted Jesus as my Savior, but I also have continuous doubts about my salvation(which I learned is called scrupulosity), and there were times when I had to ask Jesus into my heart many times(it seems like a few, but it was probably more than "a few.") I did it to make sure that I "did it right." I asked Jesus into my heart, and I meant every word I said, and I chose to place my trust in him, but every time I did, I got no reaction. You know how some Christians get baptized, and some say that when they accepted Jesus as their Savior, they got some kind of reaction, like "something heavy flew off of me"? Well, I didn't get those types of reactions during those times that I asked Jesus into my heart, and I was willing to surrender my life to Jesus. When I had explained this problem to my mother, she assured me that I am saved and that I am not headed for hell, and she told me that I display signs of eternal life, and she also told me that one of my pastors had spoken to her, telling her that I am spiritually growing. I also talked to a friend at church, who also assured me that I am saved. Despite ALL of these assurances, I STILL DOUBT!!! I know we all doubt about our salvation, but I do not feel like I am saved at all. I talked to a friend of mine yesterday, and though I never realized this, she told me that "feelings lie to us." I knew that the heart is deceitful, and I also learned that Satan also whispers in our ear, telling us, "Are you REALLY saved?", or something like " You did those things, and YOU'RE GOING TO HELL!!!!!" , and even when asking Jesus into my heart, "Are you sure you accepted Jesus as your savior?" and "Did you REALLY do it right?" Whatever the case, I know(but at the same time, doubt) that Jesus has my salvation secure, and that I can never lose it, but I still have doubting issues that I am saved to this day. Finally, I have harmful thoughts that I was afraid of acting upon them. There were a few times that I had an "urge" to kill my mother, even though I love her very much and I had nothing against her, and I was afraid that I was going to "act" on this thought and kill her. There was another time when I had this problem. When I used to work at that College Campus that I mentioned earlier, I was standing with my boss. Again, I have nothing against the person that this thought has, but I felt like I was so close to beating her up, and I was afraid that I was gonna do it. And finally, there is a police officer that I know, and he is really nice. I was at a car show, and me and my stepfather were talking to him, and I suddenly got this strong urge to assault him. Again, NOTHING AGAINST A PARTICULAR PERSON!! I was afraid of "acting" on this thought to beat up this cop, yet thankfully, I managed to control these urges, as with the other two. I have done much research on OCD, and it was during my first time of research on OCD after I suspected that I have OCD, I came across a page and I recognized some of the traits of OCD that I had!! Of course, I was relieved when I found out that I was not who I thought I was, but at the same time, I was heartbroken(and some I still have to this day) Such traits listed include, unwanted sexual and blasphemous thoughts, fear of becoming gay, fear of becoming a pedophile, fear of having sex with God, anxiety issues, doubting about salvation(again, scrupulosity), and a fear of "acting" upon certain thoughts which cause you to believe that you would do something bad or horrible. These are all traits of OCD that I have, and as a result, I thought I would share this testimony with fellow OCD sufferers. I do feel a bit scared about the salvation part and going to hell, and I know that God knows my needs, and he has watched over me as long as I can remember. Nevertheless, there were a few times when I asked God to put me to death because of my disabilities, because I felt so burdened. There was even one time where I was so sad about my suffering that I cried, and I asked God sincerely to help me. I know that disabilities will be no more, and that sin will also be no more, but I wish God and Jesus are here physically to comfort me and talk to me, even though I know that I can still talk to them about my problems and that they know about my problems. I know that they can cure disabilities, but since Jesus left this earth, and much much later, I can tell that he won't get rid of disabilities like this anymore. I'll just have to wait until Jesus returns(and I even had a fear of his return, because I thought that I was an unbeliever), though it has been better, as I even looked forward to the return of Jesus a few times. I am thankful to have a wonderful mother who is SO knowledgeable about the Bible and that I have been assured of salvation, and that there is a God who loves and cares about me and that he understands my problems. I am also thankful to come across a forum of people with OCD and anxiety issues, and I hope that I would have a great time on here!