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About Anxiouskittyx

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  1. Hello, this is my first post here. I'm looking for some input from others that may have been or may be in the same situation that I'm finding myself in now. Sorry if I ramble, but I'm a mess right now. I've had Gen. Anxiety and dermatillomania my whole life, tried many meds in the past but was off all meds for years until this past summer when some postpartum depression crept in and made my anxiety spike. I have been back on Prozac since July and it makes me feel so great. I feel "normal".....until night time arrives. My main source of anxiety (even on the Prozac) comes at night when it's time for bed (even with my husband home and in ebd with me), or if I'm alone in the house at night for any reason. I have a crippling fear of someone breaking into my home and either hurting my baby, stealing her, or killing me. The Prozac has actually made that time of the day WORSE for me, to the point where I get little to no sleep. Also, since starting the Prozac, my dermatillomania has gotten worse, I have basically destroyed my fingers, toes and scalp. And, on top of that, I find myself BITING, clenching down on my tongue until it feels like its going to fall off, I don't even realize I'm doing it until its hurting A LOT. 2 weeks ago I started taking .5 mg of Xanax at night in hopes that it would help. Sure enough, it did. I was having NO anxiety, NO panic attacks at night, I was sleeping and my dermatillomania went away. But, I noticed a few days ago that it was starting to make me feel like a zombie during the day, it was also giving me extremely vivid, terrifying dreams with a few episodes of sleep paralysis. I realized I was less interested in daily activities and had almost no emotions at all. I didn't take a Xanax last night and I had an awful night, head aches and panic attacks all night, barely slept. BUT, today I felt amazing, "normal" again. I had all my energy back, wanted to clean and play with my baby and cook and all that jazz. But, the tongue biting and dermatillomania are already in full swing again and its night time once again and I'm basically constantly on the verge of another panic attack and am DREADING bed time. What am I to do? Without the Xanax, I'm in a fabulous mood all day, active and happy but my dermatillomania is awful and then I can't sleep and have panic attacks all night. But on the other hand, WITH the Xanax, I can sleep at night, no anxiety or panic attacks, no dermatillomania BUT I'm basically an emotionless zombie with no energy or motivation/ambition all day. Isn't there some sort of happy medium in all of this?!