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About sadieboo

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  1. Does anxiety impede your productivity and capacity to work? To what extent?
  2. I am employed as a substitute teacher. When I go to classrooms and schools I am familiar with I am always able to go. However, I hesitate to accept different assignments. I understand that accepting them will make me more comfortable with schools and classrooms. I do not work as often as I would like and I cancel too often. I am concerned about losing my job, as I have cancelled four times this semester, without a doctor's note. I am only permitted two "free" days off without a doctor's note. I am not contributing to my household as much as I would like. My husband works part-time and volunteers part-time. If he were to accept a full-time position that would take pressure off of me. However, my husband is very happy with his current situation, and I would like to resolve my anxiety issue, so I can carry more of the load. However, I know drastically reducing my hours has the potential to heal or hurt me mentally. I have no children, and I am struggling to work even part-time. This is a blow to my self-esteem. I regularly have an existential crises over my productivity and "contribution to society". I am concerned about being defined as "lazy". On bad days I struggle to even get dressed. I feel paralyzed, with no identifiable fear. I try to work through thoughts, but it just feels like there's a bunch of adrenaline in me. My mind feels scrambled and tense and I cannot even identify faulty thoughts. I have been working very hard not to equate my self esteem with my secular work, which has helped. When I do work, I typically do well. At times, I am immensely irritable, but on the typical day I do well. I think that a regular position, where I go to the same place everyday would help my anxiety. Unfortunately, I am too nervous to apply for another job! I have held three different jobs for about four years a piece. The first six months or so are really difficult for me. I second-guess myself and ask constant questions, which becomes very irritating to trainers. I don't want to go through that again, but I know it is not guaranteed I will suffer that way. Also, when I work everyday for even one week, I become so irritable and emotional. I would like to be able to hold a full-time or even a close to full-time position, without suffering the whole way through, and causing others to suffer. I am a very high-energy individual. This can be positive-happiness, giddiness, gregariousness;or intensely negative-nervousness, clenching and grinding of teeth, hyper-vigilance. Sometimes the positive and negatives co-exist or alternate rapidly. I am often feel like I am going to "burst out of my skin" because I am so excited. Excitability can be positive, but it is a negative when I feel "out of control" and I may embarrass myself with my hyperactive behavior. A have been journaling, and doing CBT on my own for about 6 months now. I exercise daily to help with anxiety. I have been on Prozac for 18 months, and it has kept the crying spells at bay. (I suffered from anxiety for years, but I was only diagnosed 18 months ago) I do not drink any caffeine (even a tiny bit makes me intensely intense lol). I only drink alcohol occasionally, and I never binge-drink. I take Valerian as needed for intense anxiety. I take Evening Primrose Oil nightly to regulate my hormones. I have a strong support network of friends and family. These things have helped immensely, I don't feel constantly on the verge of a break-down like I used to, but I'm still not functioning as well as I would like to. I have been diagnosed with GAD. I do not take risks (bipolar) or have panic attacks. I have occasionally suffered from depression when I get frustration with my anxiety disorder. What can I do to improve my situation? Any suggestions about my employment? Any kind help is welcome. I am frustrated with my progress at this point.
  3. I used to suffer from similar issues. I always thought my husband was going to either die or leave me, it was really rough. After a year of marriage I knew I had to do something about it, because it wasn't improving. I got on some medication, which helped tremendously, I no longer felt super needy and teary. I also use CBT to help me. It helps you to distance yourself from your anxiety and analyze the thoughts behind it. It really helped me to consider things in a more logical way. I found Dr. Burns book "Feeling Good" to be instantly helpful. He speaks of several cognitive distortions (or incorrect thinking) that may apply to your situation. The fortune-teller error- thinking that you can foretell the future. I.E. determining that your relationship will end disastrously and you will be deeply and be alone forever. Replace this with a realistic thought. "It is possible that this relationship will end eventually, but it is also possible that this person will be in my life for a very long time. Predicting that it will end soon only worsens my general happiness and that of my partner. If the relationship does end, I will continue to exist as I always have. I cannot predict my recovery rate for this imaginary issue. If the relationship does end, I will not be 'alone forever' there are many eligible bachelors in existence." Mind-reading-thinking that you know what your significant other is thinking and feeling. This causes you to blow their thoughts out of proportion. He doesn't reply to a text and you think " I have deeply offended him and he hates me now." Which can cause you to foretell that he will break up with you. Instead replace your negative thoughts with realistic ones.n "He may have or may not have been upset by my comment. I cannot determine what he is feeling without clear communication with him. My comment is unlikely to provoke anger from anyone. It is unrealistic to assume he is angry, much less that he is going to end our relationship." There are more you may find applicable CBT quick reference- Are you currently on any anxiety medications or in therapy?