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I guess what's scary is how the health issues give you a reminder. I'm trying to not think about it but I get reminded every time I get up from my chair. I made a log today of everything I went through since February (since I've had a host of other small health issues starting then). It's all kinds of "signs" that I think I shouldn't have been ignoring, but at the same time there's so many logical reasons as to why I have these problems: I'm rather overweight, which puts strain on my body. I sit at my computer for 8 hours a day for work and spend 2-3 hours after work doing stuff. When I end the day to sleep, I'm on my phone and I hold it sideways and move my body to one side (think of a side sleeper) - that is very bad for your arms and shoulder blades. I haven't changed these behaviors even after seeing the PT, but i thought I was getting better in November/early December. I feel like I'm having some sort of addiction I can't shake that by admitting these issues. I know what the problem is, but I can't help myself and I'm sure it's frustrating the people I'm telling because I know what the solution should be but I'm not listening. I booked an appointment with my psychologist tomorrow but my mind is just wandering already. Did you have my joint clicking issues? I guess my worries is how these simple joint issues isn't just simple overuse/neglect, but rather what I was worrying about in the first post. My mind is already going into the catastrophic thinking stage when I know we don't know. I should be focusing on what I can control, not what I can't. I will be seeing a rheumetologist on Tuesday so I can get this straightened out, but until then, you know how us HA sufferers are. Life essentially comes to a stand still until you see the doctor, then it comes to a standstill until after the tests are done, then well, you get the point.

That's the spiral of negative thinking trying to derail you. You are catching it, so that is good. There is some stuff I buy for my elbows that occasionally develop psoriasis called "Psoriacin". The stuff smells awful because it has coal tar in it, but works to relieve the irritation so much! It comes in a small 1oz tube but a little goes a long way! It may not cause arthritis; it's just the skin. The biggest thing to do is (1) stop Googling for information. It is good to get educated, but when it goes to hypochondriasis and causes anxiety. Cut it off. (2) BREATHE DEEP. Today may be a bad day, but tomorrow may not be. Be kind to yourself; you are going through a rough time, especially with the surgery situation. I noticed that being by heat (space heater) can help relax you. (3) Determine what you CAN control, and let go of what you can't. Focus on this part instead of worrying about everything. If can control it, you can do something about it. Otherwise, let it go. I am not just preaching here, I had your issues and worse. Rocking in a fetal position having only been able to eat half a value meal (for the DAY!) and a cup of Coke because I was afraid I couldn't keep anything down. You WILL get your appetite back!

Thank you, yeah, I guess for me I'm just scared because it just happened rather suddenly. One day I'm ok and next day I woke up with everything clicking. I guess my anxiety levels have also been at high levels because my dad is getting knee replacement surgery on Monday and I have no mental plan on how my sister and I will coordinate taking care of him because we both have to work. I just made things worse for myself because I have psoriasis, like pretty bad scalp psoriasis and psoriasis on the face and ears, so I looked up psoriasis and saw some on my knee and now my mind is doing that catastrophic thinking again with psoriatic arthritis. Of course Google reaffirmed all my symptoms as well. I just drove myself crazy - I can't stop Googling, my brain is already going down these paths I know I should not be going down. My brain is now focusing on the little pains I have, every click I hear just reaffirms my catastrophic thinking. I can't concentrate at work and I lost my appetite. It's frustrating because I know what the symptoms of excessive health anxiety are - I am experiencing it right now. I don't want to eat, I can't concentrate, I have a headache, my breathing is shallow, I feel dizzy. It's like i forgot all of my CBT training worrying about this. 😞