Adults with ADHD

[clawzy 0]

For a long time, I used to think there was nothing wrong. I would go from project to project, thing to thing, never finishing anything I started and I could never figure out why I was not happy! I would impulsively buy things, hoping that would help me and make me happy. Things that I didn't need, but suddenly, out of nowhere, wanted, needed, had to have right now!

I didn't understand, and still don't understand what was wrong with me. I still do impulsive things, but not as much. I used to get tired of something, like a job that I loved, and quit! I had immediate regrets usually but the deed had been done, there was nothing I could do to take that back!

My mind was bored, I needed a challenge, I needed stimulation! Once I get used to something, that is gone. Often I don't finish what I started, I don't keep friends very long, the energy and focus to do so is just not there.

My daughter was born in 2007. I had a focus, something I couldn't just drop! I had to get help.

I talked to my doctor. She explained that she felt that I was an adult with undiagnosed ADHD and that it was going to be very hard for me to retrain my habits, but if I was committed, it was possible.

I am still fighting! that was 5 years ago. 27 years of undiagnosed ADHD is hard to overcome. Yet I get so frustrated because there are other people out there with no issues at all who claim to have ADHD, and then laugh at the "breaks" people give them, and the "things" schools do for their kids. It makes me sick!

I sat in despair so many times wondering what was wrong with me, Why couldn't I just FOCUS?

I am on medication now, I refused heavy medication, not wanting to be a zombie. There are side effects unfortunately, weight loss that we are struggling to control. I fear they may change the medication that has helped me so much.

I wasn't sure what I had because I didn't present like my brother, who had been diagnosed at a very young age.

He was very hyper, and over active.

For me it was my mind, and impulsiveness.

The diagnosis is actually Impulsive ADHD.

Has anyone else ever been diagnosed as an adult? What did you go through until you were Diagnosed? Did you know before your diagnosis?

[JOYCICLE 654]

Clawzy, we've discussed many times , in fact this week, how closely related add and anxiety are. Please take a few minutes to look at the symptoms side by side and compare. It may be just your anxiety and all its various forms and sensations. IT's highly similar to adhd . It might be a real eye opener !

[shaun 6]

I think most people could identify with your symptoms. Everyone feels impusive sometimes, most people have felt the need for a new challenge and stimulation. Humans are very complex, we need lots of stimulation and get bored easily. I'm not saying your diagnosis is wrong, but your symptoms do seem relatively normal to me.

[clawzy 0]

Well, the extent and degree of how I am isn't exactly normal, which is why I sought help in the first place.

As far as anxiety vs. Adhd, I have heard that in the past, however I have not been able to separate the two. I am not really sure that I know how, or where to begin.

My lifestyle changes have been very drastic and overwhelming. Seeing others in the forum, I thought, might shed some light on what I could do to help not only myself, but my family.

[Synthia 1]

Good luck!

[AdultwithADD 0]

Hello:

Thought I would stop in and see what your experiences with ADD/ADHD were...always like to hear about other folks in similar situations.

[honey 22 0]

What meds are u on, I have tried 2 so far and its no good, it feels amazing reading something and not feeling like the weirdo I usually feel like, I can actually proper relate to that, I often try to do something that involves thinking and I can't concentrate and I break down crying cuz I just can't FOCUS

[Kriek24 0]

My Husband has severe ADHD as an adult it affects us in ways you won't believe. At the moment i am fearfull for his job, he cannot concentrate on a task completely, he will lose his dream job and i am helpless. There is nothing i can do for him, we have tried everything. medicine makes him so depressed that he would rather die than go to work. i don't want him to suffer this loss. 

[jonathan123 2367]

Hi Kirek and welcome to AC. I am sorry to hear about your problem. First of all are you sure your husband has ADHD? Was he diagnosed as having it and who by? Anxiety can take a multitude of forms and often, when we think we have a particular aspect of it, it may not be so. Severe anxiety can cause a lack of concentration and agitation. In fact lack of the ability to concentrate is what causes so many people to take time off work. ADHD must be diagnosed by a specialist in that field and to be told by your GP that your husband has it is not necessarily true.

I am not suggesting you doubt your doctor, but any sort of mental illness, other than straight forward anxiety, requires specialist training, and a lot of doctors don't have it. You say there is nothing you can do for him, but I suggest love and support are often the best medicine. Lack of confidence follows prolonged anxiety which results in a feeling of inadequacy. What medication was he put on that makes him depressed? If the medication is doing that then a return visit to your GP is indicated. Any form of anxiety can be overcome given time. Get a second opinion and come back if you wish. We are here to help and we all speak from experience. I have not had ADHD, but I do know that for months I could not concentrate for long and my attention span was very low. I had good old fashioned GAD but it was still a nightmare. There is always hope so try not to despair.     Jon.

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[Miserable 1]

Clawzy,

I can very much relate to what you have been and ARE going through....

All through school I had problems with concentration and the ability to sit still during class. Yet when given the state IQ tests, I always scored very high scores.  You wouldn't believe the trouble I was in when my parents got home from parent/teacher conference!!! They would punish me and tell me I was lazy with my school work. 

I too have always started projects and not finished. Much later in my life I decided to go to college. I realized that I was capable of getting great grades, it just took alot more time and work then it did for others. I would read, read and re-read the same things over and over. I even used to read out loud to myself and record it. I then used to listen to the tape whenever I didnt have time to read. We are NOT stupid....sometimes we just have to do things differently than others.

As an adult  I learned about ADHD I had my suspicions so I spoke to my Dr. Problem was that I have had several Drs. over the years and none of them really took it serious enough, nor were they aggressive enough. FINALLY I found a wonderful Dr. who put me through a very extensive test. And as I suspected I do have ADHD. I actually have a very serious case of it. He was even taken back stating that he had very rarely seen anyone who scored as poorly as I did. He immediately prescribed some very aggressive medication. The thing you have to know is that meds won't do it alone. You have to retrain your ways of doing things, like I mentioned about my study habits. You CAN do it. You CAN focus...you just have to take things on from different angles. It's not always easy but nothing worth having is.

Talking to others, taking meds, taking care of your health and nutrition, and a good therapist are all very important. You will be surprised at times how helpful one small suggestion from someone who knows can change things for the better.

I'll be watching for your updates!!!

 

[ZigZiglar 10]

Sounds like text book adult ADD to me, which I also suffer from (and I can definitely identify with the symptoms you've described). I was on dexamphetamines during the latter years of highschool and noted a significant improvement in both my academic achievements and my behaviour. I still had social anxiety and depression though, but the ADD medication results certainly reinforced the diagnosis.

The impulsiveness ought to calm down as your mind does ... I have gotten myself in all sorts of financial pickles from the same cycle as you. What works for me is using a separate bank account to send an "allowance" to, which I can use guilt free at my own leisure - but I am not to use credit or touch other money. The temptations are still there, but they get less engaging over time.

[Miserable 1]

Me Again....

I read some of the replies since I have posted last....VERY INTERESTING!!!  And EXTREMELY DISCOURAGING TOO!!!  I see alot of talk about anxiety and ADHD being very similar...and difficult to separate. I guess I really never thought about it. But does make alot of sense. I however suffer from extreme cases of BOTH as well as panick disorder and bi polar disorder. So the question is always the same for me.... Am I coming or going??? Up....down....left...right??? I fought for years to remain a productive member of society.....I have lost so many jobs I have lost count. I couldn't possibly put a resume together!!! Early on......age 14 I started doing drugs and did so for 30 years. I gave up trying to work at least 10 yrs ago.  At least I think it was that long ago..???? My life was just one big disaster....I quit college due some lunatic I had to hide from (old boyfriend). There was just nothing left. Finally all the drugs and running the roads caught up to me. Jail...rehab.etc. I finally decided that being clean felt pretty good. That and the right meds THE RIGHT WAY!!! And I eventually excepted a job that just happened to fall in my lap. What a nightmare!!!! The ADHD is worse than I could have ever imagined....in my defense I was trained (NOT) horribly by this girl that I think  just has it out for me! Just about everything I have learned to do I have learned by watching and the rest by getting screamed at CONSTANTLY on a daily basis....in front of everyone!!!! Well I do not respond well to that so 2 minutes into the screaming all I can think k about is knocking her teeth down her throat!!! And YES I have now since realized I have anger issues too most likely due to my problems. I hate that all these disorders have teamed havoc on my life. I am 46 years old and alot of the dreams I have had growing up are now just to far out of reach. I resent the hell out of it. I can't even do a relatively simple yet fast paced job!!!! I used to be the assistant to the President's of some major companies. Now I have e had to resort to verbal abuse by co-workers. Even the owner of the company is always giving me grief because I am hyper. Most of the time they are yelling before I can get into the door and sit down. Emotionally Exhausting!!!! I just won't give up.

I know Im babbling!!!! Welcome to the world of being hyper.  It's just weighing so heavy on me. I am taking steps to put a stop to it all...but that's a different post. It's just real good to know I'm not alone out here even if it feels like it.

 

 

 

[jonathan123 2367]

Hi Miserable.  I bet you are! Who wouldn't be with all that abuse. Look; on this site you will get all sorts of opinions because we all speak from personal experience. One person's anxiety is not another's. What we do not encourage is relating over and over negative emotional symptoms and describing medical symptoms and  conditions that are best left to doctors. Of courses you will find much negative posting, but that is because folk are in trouble and feel negative, naturally so. But to give uninformed medical opinions is not on. An example is the use of words like schizophrenia, paranoia, psychosis etc. Very, very few on this site really know the meaning of such words because WE are dealing with anxiety and its associated problems, PTSD, OCD etc. The more serious forms of mental illness are best left to the people who are trained in such matters and sites that deal with those issues. None of us is qualified to give advice on these subjects.

But don't let that worry you. The advice from the vast majority of our members, especially the regulars, bless them, is sound because they KNOW and there is no substitute for experience in anxiety.

Back to YOU. 46 years old and giving up on your dreams is not good. You are not young, yes, but just entering middle age when everything can begin again because you now know what it's about. The environment you are in is not going to help that's for sure so can you move on, or is that not possible? Your emotions, anger, frustration etc. will be exaggerated because of your condition, but try and go along with it without the battleground you seem to be making for yourself. Getting uptight and angry is understandable in the circumstances but won't help you a lot. Can you get any counselling or therapy of some sort? To talk to someone about how you feel can help a lot. Have a good look round the site and come back and talk whenever you want.     Good luck.   Jon.

[ZigZiglar 10]

It may be worth noting that there is also a correlation between BPD and ADHD too. Worth investigating while you're researching.

I saw a psychiatrist on Monday and was formally diagnosed with Adult ADHD. I've been on Ritalin 10 since then and have noticed a significant improvement in all symptoms. ADHD meds are inherently diagnostic, as they will act like a stimulant (think of what Speed does) if you do not have ADHD physiology, and if you do, well ... they slow your world down and allow you to calmly respond to stimuli with a controlled approach, that is if you even notice said stimuli anymore. I can totally tune in and focus on what I'm doing now and none of the noises coworkers are making get my attention anymore.

Feel free to ask me any questions if you feel I can help! Cheers

[BustaIrish 0]

Concerta made my symptoms worse, a lot worse,, anxiety depression . maybe strattera will work ,, who Knows  

[Sunshine29 0]

Just recently I realized that taking medication is needed for me. I hate pills and that rt the main reason y I stopped. I was diagnosed at age 8. I'm in a new relationship and he's been pointing out everything little thing I forget and putting me down. I learned to adapt with my symptoms, seeing them as if they are just apart of my unique personality. Things like forgetting my cup of coffee I just made is now cold in the kitchen because I got detracted from a TV show or convo is normal to me. Now I see myself through his eyes and I don't like it. I'm now depressed and want to get out of this funk.