PCOS is Terrible

[Bella P 75]

PCOS is what’s causing my turmoil right now. 

1: I am on a pill to regulate my period, without it I never stop bleeding, and two days ago I broke through it. Again. It’s happened once before causing me to need my medicine changed. Leading onto my next point...

2: On the third I get my blood drawn to look at my blood sugar, insulin levels, testosterone levels, etc. Its to monitor how I’m doing and also to check and see if anything specific caused me to break through... I’m terrified something is going to be horribly wrong. My logical mind tells me this is unlikely, my past tests were very good and it’s unlikely for things to go so bad so quick, but I can’t chase the fear away. Due to things going on in my life, I went through a period of time where I couldn’t eat the healthiest, I’m scared it ruined me. Other symptoms have been popping up and or worsening, and now breaking through the pill a second time. My dad also decided tonight was a good night to make angel food cake. I ate a piece and now I regret it. What if that pushed everything into the danger zone? I’m in my room crying because I’m scared my tests will show I am prediabetic, diabetic, insulin resistant or worse. 

3: I made a post before worrying about weight loss, well I gained a bit back. While this is good because I knew I lost too much, my brain immediately set off alarm sirens because weight gain and PCOS aren’t good a lot of the time. I’m scared of gaining and losing it.

I’m just so tired and scared of everything. I can’t eat anything without worrying unless I know for sure it won’t hurt me, and I feel horrible in my own body because PCOS makes me feel disgusting for other reasons. I hate what it does. I could elaborate but we would be here for much too long. I just want to be happy and healthy, that’s all. I’m just so sick of this and I can’t tell my mom these things because she will say I am overreacting and to just, “get over it.” How do I get over a life long condition? Also, maybe I am overreacting, but I can’t stop it no matter how hard I try. I try very hard, too. 

[Bella P 75]

24 minutes ago, Total Eclipse said:

What medicine and dietary changes have you taken for your PCOS other than BC? I take cinnamon capsules daily, sperlactone, and follow a PCOS diet. 

Doctors have told me that all I need is BC because it’s, “not that bad.” I have a feeling that will change. I have to be careful with how I do my diet because I’m prone to being overly restrictive. I don’t eat a lot of sugar, I have completely cut out high fructose corn syrup and I have almost completely cut out refined carbs, though. There was a point when I was first diagnosed that I went too far with dietary restrictions out of fear and insecurity and my doctor was actually concerned. I lost too much weight too quickly and my good cholesterol went down. I’m just a mess. I try to be as PCOS friendly as possible without taking it too far. I eat a lot of foods I know are good for PCOS, too. That period of time where I couldn’t eat the best due to poor circumstances is still weighing on my mind, though, and today things have been tense so I didn’t feel like I should say no to what my dad made. 

[Ms.Moon 18]

Birth control can also contribute to your emotional issues as well unfortunately.  

[Bella P 75]

16 minutes ago, Ms.Moon said:

Birth control can also contribute to your emotional issues as well unfortunately.  

I know, but I have no choice, without it I’m constantly on my period. There are other factors to why my mental state is so bad as well, but I have heard birth control also can play a part. I hate it. 

[Bella P 75]

5 hours ago, Total Eclipse said:

If your not getting the results you need with this doctor you may have to see another. There is so many different treatment plans for PCOS. The diet is very important and I don't know why they haven't explained that part to you! 

She has explained diet is important, and for the most part I’ve been doing great at it, I just hit some rough spots thanks to the situations my dad put me in. They’re making me afraid. I, again, also have to be careful with being too restrictive due to past struggles. She knows this as well. She also knows how bad my anxiety is and has tried to help me not be so fearful. I had a horrible specialist at one point who made PCOS out to be a death sentence to the point I began having psychosomatic diabetes symptoms and I panicked over food. I have noticed that she doesn’t like to over treat and is very minimalistic, though, when it comes to medicines. She said she wanted to wait for my blood test results to even touch medication. I get my blood drawn on the third. I’m just a huge mess. We also don’t really have much of a choice for doctors right now either way. Here in this house, in the middle of nowhere, this is the only doctor we can get to. When we were staying with our friend we couldn’t even find a general practitioner yet.