Emotional Abuse 3 years Ago

[California Renee 0]

It’s been 3 years since my last relationship. Although that relationship was only a few months long, he began to emotionally abuse & throw insults at me. If I cried, he would ignore me. I feel like I have PTSD: nightmares, panic attacks at the mere thought of dating again or if a man shows interest. New phobias. I tried some EMDR (4 sessions- maybe not enough) & am trying TRE (trauma releasing exercises that have greatly helped soldiers back at home). Can anyone relate to a long past abusive relationship that stops you from dating again? Also, does anyone get severe anxiety knots in the stomach that lasts for many hours? 

[BeautifulDisaster 68]

Hi there.  I don't have experience with what you are asking, but I do have experience with emdr, and from reading your post, emdr sounds like something that could really help you.  Even with emdr therapy, you need to have a therapist that you click with.  Do you click with yours?  Also, why did you only have 4 sessions?   Typically emdr for your pressing issue can run 8-10 sessions and often causes more things that could be processed to come up.  I am curious to know if your therapist stopped or if you stopped.   I found it so helpful for me, and in the course of therapy, there were days where I would talk to her and she would say "let's do emdr to process this."  So it can also be kind of ongoing.   No doubt that you are suffering with PTSD and emdr is so good for it - I would say give it another try.  I am not familiar with TRE, but as it deals with trauma, that could benefit as well.  Are you working with a therapist?   Working with a therapist is important when you start working with trauma.   Also, anything that helps you reframe the past will help you move through this.  I have even used reiki with past regression and found that very helpful and supportive of the emdr work that I did.  And yes, severe knots in the stomach that last for hours is so common with anxiety.  There was a period of time when I dealt with them too.  Realizing that they were the result of anxiety helped because it took the fear away and I saw them as a sign that I needed to take care of my body - decrease the stress.  It sounds like you are in the process of getting the help that you need, and you should be proud of that.  As you continue to work through the trauma,  the stomach pains will alleviate as well - we also hold the trauma in our bodies hence the stomach pains.  Hope this helped.