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SurferJoe last won the day on May 13

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  1. I have not had any swelling or really any actual pain. It's more of an off sensation in that area. It's something I notice almost out of the corner of my eye if that makes sense. I had no worries until the initial incident and even that was minor. It just opened up the idea to my mind and my anxiety seized on it. That said, I do think maybe a physical component has developed. The more I focus on that part of my body, the more tension I think I carry, so now I do have moments where I have some soreness related to that.
  2. About a month ago, my partner accidentally kneed me in the groin while we were sleeping. It felt like it does when someone (or something) gets you in the testicles. She felt awful about it, but purely an accident. I then made the leap that something was wrong with my testicles and I spent the next 30 minutes checking them over for anything wrong. It became rather obsessive. My brain kept saying check and then check again in case you missed something. I didn't find anything. On the rational side, I know nothing happened out of the ordinary. That part of my anatomy is really sensitive and it got bumped and I felt something. It's happened before. I just can't let go of the worry. It has manifested itself into a lingering on and off again pain (mostly just a dull sensation) in the general area of my groin (mostly on one side). I can tell myself a multitude of reasons why this is all in my head. The symptom came after the anxiety trigger. I have felt this anxiety/sensation before. The off putting sensation/pain comes and goes. It has not been constant over the past month. It has gone away for minutes and hours and days and even weeks. It "vanishes" whenever my brain is focused on something else. It actually completely vanished last weekend. We went away and while I was worried about it on Friday morning, I felt nothing all the way through Monday night and then it got triggered again. This time, I was drying off after a shower and I noticed the skin on my inner thigh was red and sore, most likely from all of the walking I did last weekend, but then bang, the odd groin pain came back. It was really hard to take. I thought I was passed whatever this was and before I could truly take a breath it was back. I do wonder if there is now a physical component. I wonder if my brain focusing all of this energy towards that part of my body causes it to tense up. That is almost what it feels like. It's also worse when I spend the day sitting at work. It will feel normal when I wake up, but throughout the day I can feel it creeping in and taking hold. That might be why it has felt better on days when I'm up and moving most of the day (like last weekend). Anyway, thanks for listening. Deep down I feel like this is in my head, but I just can't seem to shake it. It will be gone for a period of time, but then it's back.
  3. My appointment went well. I'm glad I went in, but it was a really tough time building up to it.
  4. I'm anxiously counting down the hours until I go. Skin cancer has been a long health anxiety go to for me. It flares up now and then. I was anxious about a mole earlier this year. My doctor looked at it and didn't think it looked suspicious, but he suggested I go to a dermatologist. He gave me an option: wait for a dermatologist in his network (could take a month or 2) or go to a standalone dermatology clinic. I could get in there faster, but it was going to be more expensive. I went that route. The dermatologist agreed it was not suspicious, but removed it anyway. I then went back to my doctor for my yearly physical and he asked if I'd had a full body skin checkup. Darn. I did not ask about that when I was at the dermatologist. I've stewed on that for a few weeks and then had a skin related anxiety flare-up the other day. I woke up this morning and decided to get something scheduled. I chose a doctor who was part of my medical network and made an appointment. As I mentioned above, however, I didn't expect to get in so quickly. This is good and bad. It's good because I don't have to wait. It's "bad" because it's a lot to get my head around very quickly. I actually had the thought this morning on my drive in that it would be great to just get checked right away, but I didn't expect it would be an option.
  5. I called to make an appointment and they said, hey, he actually has an opening today. I guess that rarely happens and they chalked it up to a cancellation. I took the appointment. I was kind of expecting that it would take several weeks to get an appointment and then I'd have time to build up my courage to go, but on the other hand it also feels okay not to have to wait. I can just gut it out and get it done with.
  6. Self talk helps me a lot. Your anxiety represents an irrational side of your thought process. Listen to those thoughts, but then let your rational mind respond. For instance, you mention that you've been really anxious lately, but then say you guess it's your new job. Have that conversation in your head. Hear the irrational part express worry, but then use the rational side to respond. Same thing with the twitches. Just keep the conversation going. It might take time, but it's a good habit to develop.
  7. Skin cancer is a common go to for me. I went and saw a dermatologist earlier this year for a "suspicious" spot. She decided it wasn't anything to worry about, but decided to take it off if it would help ease my anxiety. I'm now working on getting an appointment for a full skin checkup. This is causing me anxiety. On one hand, I know being proactive is good. I'd rather things were caught early, but I'm also worried they will find something. Ignorance is bliss (sometimes), but also not bliss. It sometimes feels like I can never win.
  8. It sounds like you're going through a lot and stress can definitely cause everything you've mentioned. I've found stress leads to physical symptoms leads to anxiety leads to stress and on and on. I've definitely experienced a fluttering feeling before. It's frightening for sure. I've even asked my doctor about it and he told me very likely a stress/anxiety response.
  9. I know it's not easy, but best thing to do is just to take the plunge and get it looked at.
  10. I went to my appointment and the dermatologist didn't see anything wrong with it. She did give me the option of having it removed and I took her up on it. I have to wait a week or so for results, but I'm not too worried (for now). Glad I went in. Glad I had it removed. Hope to get good news and then can put it out of my mind.
  11. Sounds like the doc didn't decide for me. I got a call from the scheduling office with a referral to see a derm in their provider network. The wait is at least a month if not longer. I'm sticking with the appointment I made for Monday, but I feel like if he had seen something that looked bad - waiting a month or 2 for an appointment would not be on the table. It would be get in ASAP.
  12. I do - and she helped put me at ease when I got home last night. It really does help. I feel better about it, but as we all know the anxiety is going to bubble beneath (and sometimes through) the surface until I get this dealt with. There was a period where I was at the dermatologist on a regular basis. I'd find something that freaked me out, I'd go in, they'd biopsy it. This is essentially what I'm doing this time. I have something that is troubling me, so I'm getting it dealt with. I do feel that my doctor would have been more forceful had he seen something that truly concerned him. I think I kept the appointment because I was expecting a certain outcome to ease my anxiety. In a sense, I was using the doctor visit as a tool. When it didn't go that way it was upsetting. That said, I can understand why it went the way it did. I'm having the same issue looked at twice in less than a year and both times I talked about how anxious it was making me. I told him several times that I don't think it has changed, but it's making me anxious. Recommending that I just get it dealt with was the right choice - if all goes well then I can put it out of my mind.
  13. I've long struggled with HA. The worst being 10-12 years ago. I put in a lot of work/therapy around it and have made good progress, but it still flares up. It usually just takes something to catch in my mind and then I have to work through it before it takes hold. I have a mole on my stomach that has been bothering me. There is nothing obviously wrong with it (though it is a little dark). I can't remember how long I've had it, but early 2020 it caught my attention. I had my doctor look at it during my yearly physical in March and he said it looked okay and that I should let him know if it changed. It popped up a few times during the summer and fall. I didn't notice any change, but I noticed it again. I went as far as making an appointment with my doctor, but then cancelled once my anxiety backed off. I had another moment of anxiety 2 weekends ago. I fought against the idea of making an appointment and then eventually did. I saw my doctor this morning. He looked at it again and while he didn't see anything that worried him, he recommended that I see a dermatologist to get a biopsy. I did discuss my health anxiety with him and I feel like part of his decision was so I could get it off of my mind. I have an appointment for Monday and I'm trying to keep it under control. I was hoping I'd go in and he'd just dismiss it as nothing and send me on my way - a repeat of what happened during my physical in March. This did not happen. I keep telling myself that if he had seen something that worried him that he'd have told me and said go get it checked out right away. He did not do that. He just said I should go to a dermatologist to get it looked at (and also to get a full body checkup). I feel like he took into account my health anxiety as in get it looked at and removed and then you won't have to worry about it. He gave me a choice of waiting to see a dermatologist in his network (which would have taken a few months) or going to an outside his network dermatologist where I could get in sooner. He seemed to indicate that the choice was mine, but ultimately gave me a number for the place I could get in sooner. I just don't know what to do. I don't want to worry too much. I don't think the mole has changed. I do think (I hope) that if he had seen something that was off that he would have told me. I do feel like this is the best course of action - get it looked at and removed. That said, I was hoping for some relief from today's appointment and I didn't get that - just a continuation of this current bout of anxiety.
  14. Yeah, I also don't know of anything that "work" works. I do stick with some old standbys like drinking warm liquids and taking hot showers. I'd also recommend drinking a lot of water. Get well soon!!
  15. If you have reflux, I think what you could be feeling is gas pain in your chest. I don't have reflux, but I have had similar sounding pain and I was told it was probably gas. I think could be why it changes when you move.