I did it again.

[altrouge 3]

Now the thought of going to school on Monday isn't making me feel any better.

So, yesterday we had a school talent show (we call it Coiste Concert) that runs from 8pm to 10.30pm. Anyways, me and a friend were already helping out with the preparations for the whole school day, and we were also meant to be there that night to help out.

By the end of the day, one of the teachers in charge told us that each of us that's going to be there will have a turn to introduce each act that's performing, and of course I am no exception. So what will happen is that I will be up on stage, with a microphone in my hand, stating a brief introduction of the following act - infront of a huge hall filled with adults, children, my own classmates, teachers, and other teenagers.

I didn't show up last night, I can't do it. Even if I promised to be there, help in the backstage and all, I didn't go. Now I'm just waiting for Monday to come, anticipating everyone who were there to be disappointed in what I've done.

[shaun 6]

Standing infront of a crowd of people and speaking can be daunting for most people. The problem with avoiding the situation is that is only reinforces your anxiety and makes it worse. In the future, you could see it as an opportunity to accomplish a challenge and build your confidence.

[altrouge 3]

Standing infront of a crowd of people and speaking can be daunting for most people. The problem with avoiding the situation is that is only reinforces your anxiety and makes it worse. In the future, you could see it as an opportunity to accomplish a challenge and build your confidence.

I've tried facing it before - I end up stuttering and turning all red I just start panicking and making mistakes

[JOYCICLE 654]

Oh Altrouge! I'm sure that was so scary. I had to take a speech class in college. Guess what ? We had to give speeches in front of the class! Not sure why that surprised but it was morbid. At that time, my anxiety was pretty much nil but it was still terrifying. I completely understand. Don't beat yourself up over it. What's done is done. If ever you're in the same situation, you should go and talk to the teacher and say you're not comfortable with that, rather than miss the whole evening.

[altrouge 3]

Oh Altrouge! I'm sure that was so scary. I had to take a speech class in college. Guess what ? We had to give speeches in front of the class! Not sure why that surprised but it was morbid. At that time, my anxiety was pretty much nil but it was still terrifying. I completely understand. Don't beat yourself up over it. What's done is done. If ever you're in the same situation, you should go and talk to the teacher and say you're not comfortable with that, rather than miss the whole evening.

The thing is I do tell them but they just brush it off..

[Tecca_Nina 3]

It's understandable really. Having to speak in front of a large amount of people is nerve-racking for almost everybody. I do not have social anxiety per se, but giving presentations or anything like that is always daunting!

[panicstricken 4]

I used to hate doing that when I was a kid. As a male I always thought my voice would crack mid sentence. In preschool I had to slow dance with this girl in front of the entire auditorium. I cried before I got on stage, but after a while I felt okay. Just pretend the crowd isn't watching you. I know most schools dimm the lights, so you don't have to see the faces of all the people watching you.

[Tecca_Nina 3]

Another thing that might help is look at the wall that is opposite of you. That way you're not directly looking at anybody.

[shaun 6]

I've tried facing it before - I end up stuttering and turning all red I just start panicking and making mistakes

You probably will experience symptoms of anxiety when you confront your fear, but responding to the bad experience by avoiding it will only reinforce your society anxiety. All you can do is ensure you prepare thoroughly, avoid worrying before the event and focus on projecting your words during the event. So what if you make a few mistakes? It's a good learning experience and you will gain confidence. I'm sure lots of other people make mistakes and have similar worries.

[shaun 6]

Another thing that might help is look at the wall that is opposite of you. That way you're not directly looking at anybody.

Agree with this advice, it is a good tip for public speaking. Focus on the back of the room and projecting your voice towards it, rather than focusing on individual faces and assuming they are judging you. Looking at individual people can trigger anxiety.

[Tecca_Nina 3]

Agree with this advice, it is a good tip for public speaking. Focus on the back of the room and projecting your voice towards it, rather than focusing on individual faces and assuming they are judging you. Looking at individual people can trigger anxiety.

Another thing my friend taught me, this will help during interviews and stuff,, if you can't look at someone directly in their eyes, look at them between their eyebrows. They'll have no way of telling you aren't looking them in the eyes, and it might make you feel a bit better.

[shaun 6]

Another thing my friend taught me, this will help during interviews and stuff,, if you can't look at someone directly in their eyes, look at them between their eyebrows. They'll have no way of telling you aren't looking them in the eyes, and it might make you feel a bit better.

That's a good idea, so long as you don't look cross-eyed when doing it, haha. If you feel you can't look people in the eye you ultimately need to work on building your confidence, but one on one interaction is a different situation to speaking to a crowd. Most public speakers do not focus on individuals in the crowd.

[altrouge 3]

If it's a one on one I'd be better off. I'll still be extremely nervous, but if it's only one person I usually could hide the feeling. When it's crowds I can't help it and it's really becoming obvious.

[Tecca_Nina 3]

If it's a one on one I'd be better off. I'll still be extremely nervous, but if it's only one person I usually could hide the feeling. When it's crowds I can't help it and it's really becoming obvious.

At the end of the day, it is nothing to be ashamed of. People need to understand that crowds are very unsettling to a lot of people. If you have tried to explain this to them, and they just brush it off and don't understand, that is NOT your fault. Sure you volunteered, but that doesn't mean you need to be put in a situation where you will not feel good.