Starting school again, afraid of failure.

[davide.h 26]

Title says it all, really. I'm starting to consider not going back at all just to save myself all that stress.

[Weezie 2]

If you've done well in school in the past, there is no reason for you to believe that you are suddenly going to start failing. I used to feel that way, and I got tired of the mindset, so I tried to look at school from a different angle. I approached the whole thing more as a competition with myself and being the best I could be for me. I got into it in a way that I actually felt satisfaction and joy about my work, and also felt tremendous accomplishment for myself when I surmounted an intellectual obstacle. Fear of failure is very common among students, but please don't let it destroy your education and your future by quitting. Just go to school and honestly try to get off on the work. Sound crazy? Maybe...but if you can make yourself love information, love learning something new, and just love learning for the sake of learning, then you can let go of the anxiety and start to truly let your mind blossom. Yes, it's hard work, we all dislike that part of it, but don't let the fact that this takes effort turn into FEAR. It doesn't have to go down that road. If it were me I would just tell myself that I am simply going to push ahead, do my best, enjoy what I'm doing, and forget about the fear the best way I can. By staying in school, you will already be miles ahead of those who aren't in school - you are already way ahead at being a winner. 

If the anxiety gets to be too much, there are people on campus you can talk to, there are meditation techniques that you can learn to calm the anxiety and eradicate it, and if it gets really out of hand, get medical advice. I suspect, however, that once you actually get into it, that your anxiety will decrease - the anxiety of anticipation is often the worst of all. So, just go to school and do your thing, and try to give yourself enough breaks and perks here and there that you don't feel totally overwhelmed.

Best wishes and best of luck with your studies.   Weezie.

[davide.h 26]

That's the thing. I was never that good of a student. That's why I didn't graduate. This isn't even the first time I've attempted to go back to school. I tried at a local college 2 but the night schedule wore me out after only a year. Why should I think this time will be different?

[davide.h 26]

My first class starts in less than 2 weeks.

[K1477 1]

Would it help if you only took one class at a time? That's what I do.

There's an online school called Penn Foster, where I'm taking classes. They give you a lot of time to complete a class. I don't know what you're studying, but maybe it could help you. 

What exactly happens when you're in school? What part stresses you out? 

 

[davide.h 26]

Well so far I haven't been happy with the level of communication between me and the school. They leave me waiting a lot. I hope this isn't an issue with my professors. That could be disastrous for me.

[K1477 1]

That sounds familiar. When I was younger, I went to a university where you didn't really get to talk much with the professors. They had TAs for that. (Teaching Assistants - basically grad students). It's better in community college - the profs are there more for the students. 

There's a book called K&W - it's about listing colleges that have special needs programs for students, and what exactly their services are. I checked it out of the local library once. Maybe it could help you.

[nolenjoney 1]

I am also very afraid of failure and it's bringing me to the brink of depression. What sometimes calms me down is knowing that I did my best but even my best was not enough but I just keep trying until my best is enough. And thats the only thing I can do. It's still hard to deal with it when I see others accomplish things I don't but I try and keep going.

[davide.h 26]

My first class is tonight!

[jonathan123 2368]

GOOD ENOUGH! Our best needs to be 'good enough'. People on pedestals have a long way to fall. Setting such high standards can so often lead to frustration and disappointment. Aiming just that little bit lower and aspiring to go higher may be better. We can only use the gifts we have. No one can give you those gifts by force or persuasion. I am good at words but useless at numbers. I had a friend who was a mathematician. An Einstein equation was child's play to him, but to me a foreign language, yet his spelling was awful. His grasp of English idioms was virtually none existent. See what I mean? To try and make me a mathematician and him an English scholar would have been cruel, and we would have both failed and been miserable.

Square pegs do not fit round holes and nothing can make them so.

[MessyNatalie 2]

I just try to take it one day at a time. I suffer from really bad social anxiety and know how you're feeling. Half of the classes I attend are actually online courses. It may be something you want to explore. Stay strong!

[davide.h 26]

An update! I'm currently in my second class and am studying for the midterm later this week. It shouldn't be too hard, mostly memorization, but like all tests I'll be glad when it's over. So far it's been interesting. Not always fun, but always interesting. I can go into more detail if people are curious but I don't want to bore anyone!