Why is it so difficult to believe doctors?

[angrry 55]

So I went back to my doctor on Friday because of the pain in my side, and also to try to find out the status of my colonoscopy and therapy referrals. Once again he listened to all my symptoms and concerns, then checked my abdomen. After that, I got the lecture... I knew it was coming eventually...it had to, this is the 5th time I've seen him for the pain. He reminded me that my stool tests were negative for blood, that I had a clear colonoscopy 6 years ago, my hemoglobin is in normal range, and the pain is not severe, nor does it disrupt my sleep. He focused on my iron level saying that in his opinion the fact it is low is a nutritional issue, not caused by loss of blood. He said again he does not believe I have c****r. He said again he does not think a CT is necessary, plus since I've had several in the past 15 years it would be exposing me to too much radiation. The referrals for the scope and therapy are still in the works. He also said that I have had lots of tests in the past few years, probably too many tests. He says I need to try to ignore the pain and distract myself. I left his office feeling pretty good. Pain was almost gone, had a great outlook and felt I was on my way to getting better.

24 hours later, the pain was back, the what ifs were back. If only he would rush the scope this would all be so much easier to get past. The doctor was very thorough with all his explanations, made me feel better but here I am 24 hours later back in the pit, saying, that's all well and good, but he hasn't done the definitive test to rule out colon c****r how can he be so sure, I know how I feel, he's just guessing. It's the same old story...I'm right, my doctor is just trying to get rid of me because I have health anxiety, he's missing something and by the time any testing is done It will be way too late. How do I stop this cycle and just believe what my doctor tells me? What causes this cycle to begin with? Why can't I, and other health anxiety sufferers believe their doctors??

[angrry 55]

no one?

Edited November 3, 2015 by angrry

[walkingwithGod 169]

I think it's because our anxious minds convince us that it must be something else so we irrationally make the decision that the doctors must be wrong. Our anxiety causes our thinking to be illogical and irrational at times so once we are focused on "that one thing", a lot of times it doesn't matter what the doctor or anyone says for that matter. It's hard for us to see that the doctors are way more educated than we are. You said yourself, after leaving the doctor office you were feeling pretty good, minimal pain, had a positive outlook. That should prove to you right there that it's anxiety.. if it were something more serious, it would not matter what the doctor told you, your pain and attitude about it would not change ... my dad had colon c****r and there was no mistake about it. You do not have the symptoms he had when he went to the doc about it. Just keep hanging in there, I believe you are going to be ok  remember, the doctors know more about this stuff than we do! 

[angrry 55]

ty Wendi...it would be so much easier if the pain in my side would just go away and stay away...that and the gas and bathroom issues...from what i learned over the years (don't worry I no longer google) colon c****r on the right side takes a long time to show symptoms...that is my concern, this has has been growing for a few years and is now showing itself with the pain..i get angry with myself because my doctors words only reassure me for a short time...he has always been there for me and diagnosed me correctly...its just that this pain is so real...sorry about your dad, i hope it all went well for him.....thx again i really appreciate your words and that you took the time to reply..it is much appreciated

[walkingwithGod 169]

Have they checked your gallbladder and all of that? I know, I do understand believe me. I have chest pain and from when I was googling, I can remember the things I have read about heart conditions and heart attacks and such so every now and then, I will get that pain in my chest or shoulder or back or something and my mind automatically things "oh no, heart attack or blocked artery"... I know it's not, i have been checked by the doctor and had numerous tests. So I know all too well that at times, the physical pain we feel sometimes overrides what we know is right. 

We are here for you, so it is my pleasure to respond  

[angrry 55]

tx Wendi..I wish I could blame all this on my gallbladder but i had it removed 6 years ago...i'd love to go back to my doctor this week, but i run the risk of really annoying him and then where will I be?...I just don't know what to do anymore..I'm just really scared.....

[walkingwithGod 169]

then it's for sure not your gallbladder   don't go back to the doctor since you were just there. Just try to do your relaxation techniques, (breathing and such) and find something that can help take your mind off it... I know you are scared and that fear is fueling what your feeling... you have to practice acceptance . Keep reminding yourself what your doctor told you the other day that seem to make you feel better and reassure you, even if it was a short time.. .that is what i do, i remind myself all the things my doc has told me and all the clear tests results I have had...

[angrry 55]

ty Wendi...this would all go away so quickly if the doctor would just push the colonoscopy....i will do as you suggest tho...i'll use relaxation techniques as try to accept this, although that part will be hard. I keep telling myself over and over what my doctor said, however the pain keeps pushing it out of my mind

[walkingwithGod 169]

just because you are focused on it. You are localizing your focus on that one thing so when you try to think of other things, the thing you have been focused on overrides it. I know, I have been there! Same thing just different pain (as mine was in my chest) Dealing with anxiety and learning the acceptance process is hard, I get that. I am still trying to practice it myself and some days, I don't do such a good job at it but I don't give up

[angrry 55]

thx again Wendi, I really appreciate all your help with this...I think I'd probably be better off not waiting for the doctor to refer me to a therapist..I need to do that on my own...I could be waiting months for a referral...maybe going for a walk in the rain will help take my focus of my pain

[Gilly 1086]

I had 'the lecture' from my gastro twice ang... They were right, I was wasting my life worrying about pain when I was in great shape. Anxiety, stress, worry. For no real reason. You have health anxiety bud, you say it would all go away after the colonoscopy. Truth is probably only for a short time until it moves onto something else. That's why you need the therapy more than the scope imo. 

Why do we not believe the doctors? That's the golden question. I've had ZERO reason to doubt them before, re my crohns. Decades of it, add anxiety to the mix? Whole different ball game! For me personally, it's like I've had to learn all over again. 

[angrry 55]

thx Gilly...i wish i was as sure as everyone else....this pain doesnt feel like the IBS i know...ur right the therapy is needed but to me the scope is needed as well...thats the definitive test...i'm sorry i know how frustrating it is trying to reason with someone who has HA....I certainly don't want to be THAT guy...oh no look who's here...how do we get rid of him...although I think my doctor is already at that point...

[Gilly 1086]

Pfft never! You are one of us, you are a friend! Stop being so hard on yourself! 

[Mark G 1187]

Never think like that ang,  we're all in the same boat here pal,  no judgements only support. 

[angrry 55]

ty Gilly and Mark...I really hope I hear about my scope and therapy referrals soon

[Mark G 1187]

I'm in therapy at the moment and trust me,  its very very helpful.  

[angrry 55]

i think the referral for therapy will take a long time...so I will probably look for therapy on my own..just trying to figure out how to pay for it

[Mark G 1187]

I feel for you.   I had to wait 4 months to see a therapist on the NHS but I know not much can be done due to the chronic shortage of staff. 

[angrry 55]

thx Mark...we'll figure it out...was reading up on referrals here...depending on where your doctor refers you it can be a 12-14 month wait

 

[Bones0013 43]

OMG Angrry! 12 - 14 month wait! There must be a shortage in your area. My general practitioner got me into a psychiatric nurse practitioner in a month and she got me into one of the counselors in her office in a month. I should count my blessings. I have been seeing them for two years. I can't imagine not having them. Two great women. Hope you can get to counseling much sooner!

[angrry 55]

thats the canadian medical system....they talk a lot about helping people with mental health issues...but for treatment covered by the health care system there is a long wait unless its an emergency...private therapy is available quickly but it is very expensive

[Bones0013 43]

Well, that's ridiculous! Sounds like they don't take it serious. Just push us aside and maybe we will go away! Hate that for you Angrry. I know you have had this issue for along time. Please hang in there until you can get some comfort. I think when we get to be our age we don't know when we should worry or blow it off to anxiety. My doctor has moved in with some new doctors. I've been in there so many time in the last couple of months that they know me by name. They probably think I'm a hypochondriac on top of everything else. My ear got stopped up right after I had seen my doctor. I was to embarrassed to make another appointment so I've been using home remedies. Yes, scared to death I will damage my ear drum but I haven't yet.

[angrry 55]

thx Bones....I'd love to go back to my doc...but i was just there Friday...I don't want to get "fired" as a patient....I think if I go back in a couple of weeks or so I'll take my wife with me...hopefully she can pass on to the doctor anything I've said to her about how I have been feeling, things I've forgotten

[angrry 55]

this is so hard...my side hurts..haven't been to the bathroom today, which worries me...and still no word from my doctor about a scope...feeling abandoned and very very scared... 

[Abbylou12 14]

I'm sorry angryy, please don't feel alone. There's lots of people who feel the exact same way, me included! I'm     Know what you mean when you say abandoned. I feel that way often. If u need to talk I'm here.