Anxiety Won't Let Me Be Excited

[BejeweledMexican 32]

Besides my fear of TB last week I feel like I'm doing much better this week. I finally put my two weeks notice into my job. It's true what they say, some jobs just drain you mentally. My last day is the 19th and I'm just counting down the days till then. It seems like multiple times a day I just want to pull my hair out from this job lol out of 10 jobs my whole life this has been the worst. But anyway, I'm excited for things ahead......almost too excited. 

I spoke with my counselor last night and told her I feel like since I'm so excited and so happy, something bad is going to happen. I hate having that mindset. Like all I can think of is how easy it would be, in the span of less than two weeks to be diagnosed with a deadly disease and all the things I'm excited for just crash down by one doctor's diagnosis. I just hate having this minset. I'm sure I'm not the only one, right? I mean I've seen that meme where it's like 'When things are going suspiciously good....something must be wrong' or something like that. I feel like that. 

The past two days my back has been killing me but I've been handeling that pretty well, not trying to fight the pain, just kind of letting it happen. But I've also been having some random stomach stabbing pain and also a headache that's been here for about 3-4 days. It's a dull headache and very annoying. I thought at first it was sinus but it won't go away with my normal allergy meds. 

Basically.....how do you not let your mind wander to the worst case scenario? I'm so excited. I'm excited to start school again, feel like I have a purpose again, have my own apartment again, etc. I long for that...but my anxiety won't let me be too hopeful. How do you fight that?

[bin_tenn 1252]

What did your counselor say about it? Did she give you any tools / techniques to combat those thoughts?

That thought pattern is classic anxiety. I think we've all been there, or are currently there. Anxiety, if permitted, will strip us of our excitement and happiness. This is why it's important to learn and practice techniques such as mindfulness and acceptance. It will help to diminish and lessen these thoughts and behaviors that we experience.

Does your counselor specialize in health anxiety? Is she talking about CBT or anything specifically targeting health anxiety? Simply seeing a counselor and talking about your anxiety probably won't be enough to get you past it. You'll need to seek treatment specifically for the anxiety.

[BejeweledMexican 32]

41 minutes ago, bin_tenn said:

What did your counselor say about it? Did she give you any tools / techniques to combat those thoughts?

That thought pattern is classic anxiety. I think we've all been there, or are currently there. Anxiety, if permitted, will strip us of our excitement and happiness. This is why it's important to learn and practice techniques such as mindfulness and acceptance. It will help to diminish and lessen these thoughts and behaviors that we experience.

Does your counselor specialize in health anxiety? Is she talking about CBT or anything specifically targeting health anxiety? Simply seeing a counselor and talking about your anxiety probably won't be enough to get you past it. You'll need to seek treatment specifically for the anxiety.

I'm not sure if that's her specialty or not. She is a really great counselor but since I'm moving I may have to seek a different counselor anyway since there's rules about what state you live in. She has given me a lot of great tips and also is really good about looking things up that she's not sure about. However, we talk about more than just the health anxiety aspect of life so I'm not sure if that's a problem or not. 

I just want to go into this next phase with excitement. Right now though I'm just feeling down and depressed because 1. I'm still stuck at this stupid job (even though I'm almost finished) and 2. I feel like something is coming....something bad. I hate that. I wish I could move time. Do you have any suggestions??? I'll take anything! I just have to get through these next 2 weeks. 

[bin_tenn 1252]

All I know to say is practice mindfulness and acceptance, and treat the root cause - anxiety. I know you hate hearing it, but that means seeing a doctor (preferably a psychiatrist) who can talk to you about medication. And of course seeing a counselor who has a strong hold of treating anxiety, especially health anxiety.