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Hi Guys - Just joined today but I've been a reader of the site for some time now...I finally decided to post something to maybe get some opinion or comfort from folks that know exactly what this is like. Some background info, Male, just turned 36 last week and am hopelessly anxious all the time...mostly about my health. I have GAD and see a therapist for it. Over the years I've diagnosed myself with just about every chronic and fatal disease in the book and usually led doctors and specialists on a wild goose chase of testing to rule something out. Then when nothing ever came back, the symptoms simply went away. It's a vicious cycle and it has become a horrible existence at times...I simply can't find a way to be normal. I used to take SSRIs and they sometimes helped because they'd make me not obsess over things, but the side effects were too much and I went off them and have been clear of them for about 8 months now....here we go... So about a month and a half ago I started feeling some discomfort in my right hip and went the the chiropractor a bunch of times over the next few weeks to try and alleviate it and nothing seemed to work. At times the pain would descend down into the groin and right testicle. It's not a brutal pain or anything, just a dull ever-present discomfort that's always there. Sometimes it's tender in the area just to the left of the "ball" of my hip and pretty much down a line...I think that's the inguinal ligament. Anyway, around Thanksgiving I contacted my doctor because I was sure I had Epididymitis. I would squeeze the epididymis and it would hurt like hell and since I had had it before 2 times I thought I had it again. I got in touch with my Dr. and amazingly he gave be an antibiotic to treat it...against his better judgement, I pretty much trapped him but contacting him right before the Thanksgiving holiday. Something I still regret doing. In any case, my pain pretty much went away towards the end of the 10 day course of antibiotics and the lower right abdominal/hip/groin pain didn't. I've been waiting and waiting to call the Dr. back again and go see him but today I finally did and made an appointment to go in tomorrow. I can't really say it could be a hernia because I don't really have any bulges in the abdominal wall. Here's the whole reason for the post though. So lately, say over the past week and a half my bowel movements have changed. They're not regular, sometimes hard, sometimes soft and overall they seem "thinner" and kind of flat. That freaks me out because even though I've fought it forever at the advice of my therapist, I broke down and started to seek advice from the evil Dr. Google. The BMs don't contain any blood which I feel is some sort of positive, but is that always the case with colon cancer? I've feared this particular type of cancer for some time now, my parents, grandparents and even my older brother (who is 41) have all had colon polyps. I'm just afraid again and seeing some sort of comfort/advice...maybe even stuff to mention at the Dr. tomorrow. I should also mention that last year I had similar discomfort in the lower right abdomen and the Dr. sent me for an abdominal CT and nothing was found. Would they have seen a problem with my colon in that or is that only seen through a colonoscopy? Over the years I've had 2 abdominal CTs, a few head CTs and XRays and I'm starting to also wonder if I may have caused something to myself with all that radiation. Sheesh I just don't know anymore, but I'm starting to get to my wits end with this and it's just messing with my quality of life in every way. I wish I knew what it was like to be "normal" and not have to experience these "episodes" every year or so. Thanks for taking the time to read this mess and for any advice/suggestions you may have. I know that if you're here on this site you probably have a lot of the same afflictions as I do and might be able to lend a hand. I'll be sure to update this with whatever comes of this situation and hopefully help someone else out in the future.

Dear All, First and foremost, Happy New Year. I have come here in hopes of being given some positive support as my struggles with health anxiety over the past 1+ weeks has taken its toll on me, and sadly my wife and daughter. This story is lengthy, but hopefully you won't mind reading through it. Back in 2010, my mother was diagnosed with stage IV lung c****r. It was found after she had a seizure, so it was a complete surprise. She passed away a year later and her passing really took its toll on me. I was 25 at the time of her passing. I believe this is what triggered my health anxiety, because from then on I assumed every little thing wrong with me was due to some terminal illness. Later in 2011 I had a painful bowel movement and bloody stool. Of course, I immediately assumed I had stage 4 colorectal c****r. I went to the GI doctor who looked at my anus/rectal region and diagnosed me with an anal fissure and internal hemorrhoids. It was a huge relief. I adjusted my diet and took stool softeners once and awhile. I did not see any blood in my stool for 5 years until June 2016 when I noticed bright red blood dripping into the toilet. I also had a few episodes where I wiped and saw bright red blood. In August 2016 I had a painful bowel movement and had more bright red blood that coated the stool. At the time I figured that this was once again my internal hemorrhoids and/or another anal fissure. However, I did go see a different GI doctor in September 2016 and explained what had happened; however, instead of examining my anus/rectal region he just talked to me and wanted to schedule a colonoscopy without any sort of examination. I was a bit deterred by this as I expected him to at least see if he can see the source of the bleeding. I decided against the colonoscopy and went ahead and started taking a fiber supplement, which really did wonders for my bowel movements and had no issues with bleeding for awhile. Fast forward to December 21st, 2016 I had what I thought was some blood on the toilet paper when I wiped. I could not tell if it was bright red, because it was mixed in with the stool on the toilet paper so it was darker in color. I was also eating a fair amount of carrots at the time, and have thought it maybe could have been this as my stomach does not digest vegetables/fruits very well. This episode put me into a tail spin and I thought for sure this was colorectal c****r. That night I hardly slept and worried myself to the point of triggering diarrhea. I went to Urgent Care Thursday morning, and the doctor essentially told me that its likely just my hemorrhoids acting up. He gave me some stool softeners and sent me on my way. I was relieved, but the thought of still having colorectal c****r was still there. Later that day I developed a fever, but it was quickly broken after some ibuprofen. I assumed this was just a result of little sleep and little food as well as constant worrying. I dropped about 2 pounds from 270.8 to 268.9. I regained some semblance of an appetite on Friday and Saturday, possibly through overeating, and got the scale back up to 271.5 Christmas morning. I was relieved and felt pretty good. My in-laws came into town Sunday afternoon and stayed till Wednesday the 28th. During this time I did not think about having colorectal c****r too much, and tried to eat a good amount. However, Wednesday I weighed myself and I weighed 270.0, and was concerned why I would drop 1.5 pounds even though I am eating more than I normally would. Wednesday and Thursday I purposefully tried to eat a lot and got my weight up to 271.1 by Friday morning. However, my weight dropped back down on Saturday and Sunday, hitting 269.2 on Sunday and then 267.9 this morning. My anxiety has been at a very high level since Saturday night, with sleeping being nearly impossible, feeling hot, pacing back and forth, sweating, and feeling nauseous and having no appetite. I have been eating junk food and overeating the past couple of days to try and get my weight to rise back up, but it doesn't seem to matter. My weight keeps dropping which, when I Googled "bloody stool and unintentional weight loss", yields pretty much only colorectal c****r. I know I should have never Googled it, but I did and now I can't shake this thought. I guess I have a few questions: 1.) Can anxiety cause weight loss even if I'm force feeding myself more than what I would normally eat? 2.) Can anxiety cause sweating, hot flashes, high pulse rates, high blood pressure, bubbling stomach, and nauseousness? 3.) What other conditions could contribute to unintentional weight loss and bloody stools? 4.) Can I experience anxiety, even when I am not actively thinking about it? A little bit about myself, I am a 30 year old male with a beautiful wife and 1 year old daughter. I am 5'8" and obese (as you can tell from my weight). I will be scheduling a trip to the GI doctor tomorrow, but I could really use personal stories and uplifting thoughts in the meantime. I truly believe the only way i will get over this colorectal scare is to go ahead and get the colonoscopy done, but now I fear it may be too late and I missed my chance back in September and now it had spread. I don't want to dwell on the past, and pray that my decision to not get the colonoscopy at that time does not come back and haunt me. I am in a really sad place and I am so appreciative to have a forum like this to express my thoughts and concerns and hear from others who are going through similar issues. God Bless and thank you for taking the time to read this. -Jim