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Lillith

Multiple personalities (dissociative identity disorder)

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Well, I haven't seen any place for people who suffer from multiple personalities (if I'm wrong and there's a place then I would like to know).

So, I'm 19 (soon to be 20), I'm from Puerto Rico and I have multiple personalities. So far I have 7 personalities, all females from a kid to adults.

The ones that are usually around are Hazel, Anne & the little girl Suzy.

I have an account on another forum that's for people with eating disorders and Hazel has made threads there and people get confused..

It affects me and my loved ones in lots of ways.

For example, if I'm with my fiance and Hazel comes around he can't treat her like he treats me.. Hazel is lesbian, and even tho its my face and body Hazel is complete different person..

My "emotions" change for them, but in my reality is just one of the girls that's taking control who feels that way not me..

Its complicated to explain because for me they are all different and totally separated people..

But at the same time they are me.. they talk to me, is like I have guests in my head..

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Hi Lillith. It is probably because this site is primarily concerned with anxiety its and associated problems, although if you look in 'forum links' you may find useful information.  I know a lot of other sites have personality disorder forums. Have you tried any? Do you have any professional help? But more importantly, how do your immediate family and friends feel about this? We can get a lot of support if we have understanding people around us. It sounds as if your fiancé helps, but it must be difficult for anyone to enter into your feelings and emotions. I have no knowledge of such disorders (if they are disorders), so it would be unwise of me to comment.      Jon.

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Jon.

I didn't really know there are forums for DID, I'll look them up, thanks.

Right now my therapist is helping as much as she can, but this disorder is hard to control or help.

My family thinks I'm just crazy and the "change" between personalities are hard to grasp because it just looks like I'm bipolar.. and that's not it.

The only moment that they realize that I'm not crazy or bipolar is when the Suzy arrives because she cries a lot (she's very sensitive; she's 6 years old). My fiance has met all of them except one.. so far he recognize when Hazel, Suzy and D. are around but he can't recognize the rest that well; he met me with this disorder but I never told him until this year. For outsiders I seem like a random, strange and weird girl. Thank you Jon, is hard having two disorders, but.. I can't give up..right?

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No Lillith, please don't give up. It must be very difficult for you because very few people will understand how you feel. We know so little about this kind of disorder and that is why it is so important to keep going to a therapist. Carl Jung, one of the greatest psychologists of the twentieth century, said that if a patient came to him with the problem you have he would not begin by regarding it as abnormal. How do we know what is 'normal'? And aren't we all different personalities when we behave as we do?  Keep getting as much professional help as you can and it may be that one day you will find your real 'self'. ' Strange, weird?' Join the club. I have been called that many times but now I couldn't care less.   Jon.

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Wow! I have thought stories like this you can see only at movies or read at books or essay sites Edu birdie, for instance. Wish you to get through this!

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