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Found 41 results

  1. So I know a number of people who swear by essential oils as being very helpful for all kinds of things, including anxiety. I'm on medication for my anxiety and I'm not looking to make any major changes in that department at the moment, but I am interested in things that may help relax me when I get particularly stressed. Has anyone tried essential oils or aromatherapy for this? Is there a particular brand or mix or whatever (not familiar with terms) you can recommend? Thanks for any input!
  2. Sorry, this post may be lacking in structure, but I have so much to get off my chest!! Dx I'm a 21 year old female. Over the past winter I had gotten over a mild case of pneumonia that lasted for about a month and a half, and ever since I'd gotten over it I felt fine aside from the fact that I've had a preoccupation with my breathing (which I was just told I also have sensorimotor OCD, as I also have ruminations with other things that will take too long to explain) and now I have absolutely no idea if my mind is simply catastrophizing the situation and making it much worse than it actually is or if I'm actually getting sick again. This isn't really new for me, but I sometimes can't help thinking that my predictions must be true. I am beginning to despise AND fear living inside of my mind because regardless of how I am able to get over one thing, a new thought introduces itself and creates room for more ruminations, therefore causing a panic attack to occur. I just wish I knew if my symptoms were psychosomatic and not actually real. I've been so focused on breathing that I think I am overdoing it and causing my back to go sore, and each time I feel one small difference in the way I breathe my heart starts to pound and I panic. That just makes me think, gee, if I have problems breathing then it must be serious... I always worry that an illness will attack my lungs and prevent me from living my life the way I want to (I would love to travel, sight see and pursue music). I absolutely hate it and just need a little bit of support in the mean time....thanks in advance :3
  3. I love to sing but, I've quit due to irrational thoughts of voice loss, voice not sounding, right, etc you name it! I can't seem to rid the thoughts. couple months back I was losing My mind due to this crazy flu on top of My anxiety due to withdrawal side effects from Prozac because I decided to quit taking it. thought I didn't need it. well turns out I did still need some meds so now I'm on Celexa. My voice has been perfectly fine all this time. I'm just out of practice. I need to keep reminding Myself I'm just out of practice because I've quit for months, and months. but, it's just hard! the unrealistic thoughts creep up on me again! it's beyond terrible. I've read Celexa will make you have some up and down moods and emotions when taking it but, that it'll wear off in a few weeks time. is anyone else on celexa? would love to know how it has helped you. PLEASE help me rid these terrible thoughts.
  4. The past few weeks I’ve been feeling much better and not having too many panic attacks until 2 days ago when they started back up again. I’ve noticed a ringing in my ears that’s been persistent but if I watch Tv or am talking with someone I’m able to ignore it, if it’s quiet and I focus On it it drives me nuts. I’m trying my hardest not to google because I know Where that will get me. Anyone have any input on ringning in the ears and anxiety??
  5. Hello everyone, This is the first time ever I am posting on a forum, but, like the title suggests, I just don't know what to do anymore. I have been struggling with health anxiety since I was a teenager. However, this last year it has gotten very bad. Seemingly out of nowhere I started getting panic attacks almost every day. When the panic attacks just started happening I was convinced that there was something wrong with my heart and I went to the emergency room twice. The first time the doctor laughed and said I was way too young to have a heart disease (I was 25 at the time, 26 now). He did measure my blood pressure, which was fine. The second time another doctor said basically the same thing, but at my request he made an ECG, which was looking good. He also checked my left breast for lumps (breast cancer was my other fear) but said he didn't feel anything. (side note: my mother had a weird mole on her leg, went to the doctor who said it was nothing. They later found out it was melanoma, but it had already spread everywhere and she passed away. My grandfather also died because of a mistake a doctor made. This has not helped me trust a doctors opinion). After the two emergency room visits I went to my own doctor to ask for therapy. I was officially diagnosed with health anxiety and generalized anxiety disorder and am now doing CBT focused on health anxiety. The therapy is supposed to teach me to think more rational, but I feel like the therapy is not effective because I still just can not believe that some of my physical symptoms are caused by anxiety (even though on some level I know they probably are). Every single day I have pains in the left side of my body; chest pains, stinging or a dull pain in my left breast, pains in my left armpit, my left ribs and pressure on my sternum. I am still so scared that I have breast cancer, a heart disease or bone cancer. I also know that there is such a thing as 'hypersensitivity', and I do know that I focus way too much on all my physical symptoms and probably make them worse, but I keep thinking 'what if I am doing this therapy and learning to think more rational, while meanwhile some disease is growing and spreading inside of me?'. The physical symptoms are really the biggest problem, most times I feel like I am not even stressed but the constant physical symptoms are what's causing me stress and panic. The pains on the left side of my body are my biggest worry, but in the past two months I have also been convinced that I have bone cancer, a brain tumor, a neck tumor and cervical cancer. Meanwhile, the panic attacks are still happening. Every time I get a panic attack I am scared that this time I really am having a heart attack or a stroke (pressure on chest/in head), that the doctors have missed something important and that this time I am really going to die.. even though I've had them so often and it always turns out I was not dying after all. In the past I've also had CBT for social anxiety disorder and that worked really well, but this time the therapy just doesn't seem to work. I keep convincing myself that I have a serious illness, it is almost impossible for me to believe that I am not sick. I feel like this constant fear is paralyzing me and it is definitely affecting my relationships with other people and my career. The constant aches and pains are making me feel like I am on the verge of death (I know this sounds stupid) and very often I don't see the point of living anymore because I feel I am constantly battling myself. My therapist says I am looking for a 100% guarantee that I am not sick or that nothing bad is going to happen, but that (of course) no one can give me that. I understand that, but honestly I don't know how other people can live their lives and NOT constantly be paralyzed by fear or worry. I know everyone here is dealing with similar things, but does anyone have any advice or wise words for me? Or is there someone who recognizes the daily pains and aches, especially those in left breast/armpit/ribs/chest and sternum? Can all these things really be caused by anxiety, even though to me it feels that the physical symptoms are causing the anxiety instead of the other way around? Thank you so much for reading.
  6. I've been having terrible bouts of morning anxiety. Dizziness, feeling faint, palps, pit in my stomach. It was so bad I called my PCP and made an appt for tomorrow because I was sure I was dying. I made sure I ate before my coffee this morning too which is something I never do. So what does morning and panic attacks feel like to you. I'm trying to determine if my appt was made is haste. Also, I've been posting alot today
  7. Hello, Right now has been a really intense time for me in life, and I've realized why my therapy strategies didn't work before. I used to think that GAD and panic disorder were very separate things but now I'm absolutely sure I have both. I don't have the resources to go back into therapy to try and get the help and knowledge I need about panic disorder and handling the attacks in an actually helpful way. I would really appreciate any advice or strategies you have. Thank you so much
  8. Has anyone dealt with Klonopin withdrawal symptoms? I’ve had severe anxiety since about the 3rd day that I stopped taking it. Neck pain/tension, light sensitivity, weird feelings in my head like someone is touching the nerves in my head, severe anxiety, depersonalization, lower chin/upper throat tightness, insomnia, night panic attacks/terrors. It’s been about 12days now. I was taking .5mg per day, at night.
  9. I've read a lot on this site in an effort to calm myself, so I figured I'd finally come and ask for advice. I'm a seventeen year-old girl (turning eighteen in two months) and I've had a really horrific past two weeks. I was in the ER 15 days ago for a migraine and concerns as to what could have been causing it. After diagnosing it as a complex migraine, the doctor seeing me gave me Compazine through an IV (with Benadryl) - and it was the most traumatizing experience of my life. I had a violent adverse reaction; heart pain, burning around my heart, excessive shaking and sweating, fear of death, immense panic. I've always been a shy and socially anxious person and I've been diagnosed with severe depression, but this is the first time I've ever experienced anxiety/panic attacks and their severe symptoms. Six hours after being sent home from the hospital following my Compazine experience, I suffered a panic attack immense enough to give me bodily tetany and make my arms, hands, legs, mouth, and hands seize up. I got the pins and needles sensation alongside that and feared the worst. My mom called an ambulance because we had no idea that kind of attack could occur and they calmed me down over the course of an hour. In the days following that incident, I had at least one severe and several-hour-long anxiety/panic attack per day to the point of it being debilitating and preventing me from focusing. I have had two periods of three days without attacks followed by another severe attack (the most recent being last night, I had chest tightness and really violent tremors for six hours, only calmed down and slept after taking Benadryl). I have been to the emergency room twice more; they once gave me Visatril through a pill and I had another adverse reaction, and one morning, they gave me Xanax to calm me down. To date, it is the only medically administered drug that has ever worked for me in this situation. I am at my wit's end. I have seen my parents' doctor and she prescribed me Zoloft/Sertraline at 25mg. I have not taken it yet because I have been on a myriad of medicines in the past couple of weeks and anxiety has brought out the full force of their side effects; I am scared to take it for that reason and I don't want to. My main issue is health anxiety. I have always had a slightly higher than normal pulse, so fear of a heart problem is massive. My symptoms brought on from anxiety/panic attacks have gradually ranged from chest tightness, excessive chest heaviness, chest pain on either the right or left side, neck tightness, left shoulderblade pain, pins and needles, shortness of breath, mid-back pressure, ear and head pressure, jaw and ear pain, excessive heart palpitations, violent tremors, paranoia, dizziness, hot breath, heartburn, acid reflux, disorientation, excessive weakness, cold sweats, flashes of heat on random patches of skin, fatigue, and insomnia. All of these things combined have made me terrified of heart trouble that could kill me. I've had two EKGs and a chest x-ray in my emergency room visits, and everything checked out normally, but I still am largely incapable of convincing myself that everything listed above is solely anxiety and not from a serious physical condition. Everyone on my dad's side suffers from a form of generalized anxiety, but I've never felt the side effects of it like I do now and I would do anything for it to stop. As a side note, I do take other medications (Loestrin, Curcumin, Benadryl, 5-htp, Magnesium) off and on for various reasons. The latter four are largely took for insomnia/anxiety related issues. I'm a night owl and it's impossible for me to go to bed before midnight. Is there any advice or help that can be offered to me in this situation? I want it to be over, and I don't know what to do with myself. I constantly fear something is wrong with me/that I am dying and I want it to end.
  10. Ok, I'm just going to roll with this so bear with me. It's landing in the GAD forum but is open to all. I'm posting this off the back of @lonesailor14's fantastic post about 'letting go' that she posted (see here) I let go a long time ago, I made good progress but after my husband passed away last year I've of course had many hurdles come my way. At first I was determined, I would smash this agoraphobia and panic malarkey and live life to the fullest for the both of us. (yeah, I know but it was a nice idea) I have done things I never dreamed of, but in some respects I've taken one step forward, ten back... Today our eldest cat passed away. She was the first cat we got, when we moved into our first home together and got married. She was 15. I am of course heartbroken. She was the oldest of 7, I still have 6 furbabies to look after, they need their momma and my Mum needs me too. My doctor told me this week she was extremely proud of me, I was taken a back and not sure why? @JOYCICLE shared a video with me, I watched it then took a bath. Whilst in the bath I got to thinking and became inspired. Maybe my doctor felt proud for a genuine a reason, self worth and self esteem is something I have always struggled with, and it's taken a huge knock the last few months. I struggle to take a compliment! I'm feeling like I want to grab the proverbial bull by the horns. The video I am about to share is on point, no matter what disorder you suffer from, no matter your circumstances this lady is saying all the things I have tried to do the last few years. Acceptance, and management are key and the stress hormone cortisol is one of our worst enemies. Cortisol feeds the cycle of anxiety/symptoms, lets cut it down and give our bodies and minds the help we deserve. Meds or no meds, it does not matter. This can help either way. A good balanced diet, a good sleep schedule, daily exercise and fun! Smile more, laugh more. Happy tasks and exercises, along with mindfulness and anything that promotes relaxation. This is not about acceptance, this is stress/anxiety/symptom management. BUT, whether you have accepted or not, why not try it anyway? If your anxiety and symptoms lessen, it really can help you to accept. OK I have tried not to ramble on, I hope I have made some sense! Watch the video. I am going to start on Monday. Lets give it a try over the next few months and see if we feel better. (I know we will) We will use this thread to monitor progress, You can even write a blog, oh and I highly recommend along with this to keep a worry diary. Who is with me?
  11. Hi Everyone, I am a person that has suffered with anxiety for many years now. I have always been an anxious/worried person, even as a child, but I didn't begin experiencing full-blown panic attacks until I was involved in a serious car accident. I guess it could be called PTSD, but the panic attacks continued for several years after the accident and still occasionally happen today. I am wondering if anyone has experienced a similar evolution in their mental-health and would be open to sharing their story. I am trying to learn more about my panic disorder/generalized anxiety by understanding my predisposition to these disorders, as a naturally anxious person. If anyone is willing to share, I have some more specific questions to provide guidance: 1. When did you begin experiencing anxiety/panic disorder? How old were you and were there any specific circumstances that impacted you? 2. Did you experience any events/circumstances that were particularly traumatic that you believe might have contributed to/triggered your anxiety/panic/PTSD? 3. Would you describe yourself as a naturally anxious person? Do you recall being more worried about things (sickness/health, irrational fears, bad things happening) prior to the onset of your anxiety/panic disorder? 4. Did either of your parents or close relatives experience similar anxiety problems/mental-health disorders? Do you think you were impacted by them at all? I apologize if any of these questions are too personal, of course this is just a forum and I expect that anyone that doesn't want to answer/isn't comfortable won't. I feel that learning as much as I can about my mental-health and the nature of my "problems" is very helpful in understanding why I am this way and how I can help myself and others. I hope that maybe this can help some of you as well. I appreciate any responses/contribution, and I hope that maybe we can spark an insightful conversation here. Thank you! Ally
  12. Hey all, To anyone who reads this, thank you in advance for your time and kindness. I struggled with PD for many years beginning in college. It faded away but has come back in full force over the last 1.5 months. Long story short: My apartment (while I left on a brief trip home from school) got infested by fleas. I have a major entomophobia (fear of insects), and was stuck alone with my poor kitten in a place loaded with them. I spent the next few days cleaning everything, washing sheets, vacuuming every nook and cranny (thankfully live in a studio that is primarily hardwood). I would see them hopping around (never bit me thankfully) in the vacuum bag- that obviously terrified me. I eventually got me and the cat out, dropped three bombs, and returned. Of course it wasn't a permanent solution- the bombs can't kill all of them. I left the apartment again due to the fear. I returned for a weekend and made it about 3 days before the anxiety of possibly being around the fleas got to much. I had to board my poor little cat for 18 days, and left to go see my family and fiance. I feel nothing but incredible surges of panic and distress when thinking of the fact I'm flying back to the apartment in 6 days. It terrifies me. I've had the place exterminated (sprayed) another 3 times since I left, but the phobia of these little parasitic specs horrifies me constantly. I can't escape the fear, even knowing my cat is now treated with medication and my apartment is thoroughly treated. Deep down I know the problem will resolve and they'll all die off, but god this has been the worst. So essentially, I'm away from home trying to eat and sleep properly again. My phobia of my own home due to the incident is incredibly strong (laughably an anti-agoraphobia). How do I convince myself to get back in there? As a graduate student, I need to eat and sleep- these things are increasingly difficult. I've received medication and abide by mindfulness techniques. But nothing seems to work. Any advice much appreciated, and even just reading this- I'm very grateful for you. B.
  13. How does your anxiety make you feel in the mornings?
  14. Hey guys. One thing that I always found helpful when I was struggling with panic attacks was to stop calling them panic attacks! I know it sounds silly but it actually makes a lot of sense when you think about it. What you’re going through is the fight or flight response, that’s it. If you’re telling yourself that you’re under attack, then of course you’re going to get nervous, that’s what the fight or flight response is for, for dealing with attacks and threats. Instead, I used to think of them as an adrenaline rushes. A burst of energy that’s triggered because your subconscious mind is perceiving danger, even though there is none. I know it can sound silly but that wording has a huge effect on how you perceive your experience. After taking out the negative inference that the word attack brings, i changed my view of what I was experiencing. I told myself that people pay lots of money for this kind of rush. They jump of building, play extreme sports, chase tornados, whatever. The point is that once I took away a lot of the scariness of it, I actually learned to love that rush of juice and from that point on recovery came pretty quickly. I hope that you guys found this useful. If you did, I keep a youtube channel where I share my advice and experience overcoming panic attacks. There are two main things that I focus on with my channel: specific, actionable advice that you can use in your day to day and creating hope that overcoming chronic panic attacks can be done. You’re welcome to check it out, there’s a link in my full bio or you can just google the words "youtube & vagabondster". It’s the first result. Feel free to leave me any questions in the comments, I usually respond pretty quickly. Best of luck!
  15. I've been having a lot of anxiety lately and my panic attacks have been more frequent especially during school. I feel trapped and don't know what to do. I kind of want to tell one of my teachers I trust, but I'm absolutely terrified. (Ps our counselor sucks) Any advice?
  16. I've been having a lot of anxiety lately and my panic attacks have been more frequent especially during school. I feel trapped and don't know what to do. I kind of want to tell one of my teachers I trust, but I'm absolutely terrified. (Ps our counselor sucks) Any advice?
  17. Hello everyone again I really hope I am not being to annoying by posting lots of topics but I'm trying to narrow down my anxiety. Throughout the day I have several thoughts and ideas (fears mainly I'm thinking about) that cause anxiety and make my day miserable. I have been having some physical symptoms that are making the process a bit harder to say the least. I have some bad palpitations like PVCs as well as racing heartbeats and sometimes irregular rythms. This coupled with virtigo (dizziness) spells that come and go as well as headaches, migraines, and other things of the sort my anxiety is always being set off one way or another. Right now I have been having some very DEEP thoughts that get me really thinking what is life? Am I living it to my full potential? These thoughts cause really bad anxiety and ruin my day usually. I'm gonna list some of these thoughts but I hope they don't make you think I am insane because I almost truly believe I am myself. So I have been thinking a lot about getting a job and growing up. How much is sucks to be am adult now. I keep thinking that I wasted my childhood and that I have wasted my teens and now with this anxiety and stuff I am wasting my adult life and life doesn't matter anymore. Also I have been having some serious brain fogging and having trouble remembering things and its been scaring me. Every day I'm having some sort of trouble recalling things and I am always worrieng its because I have Alzheimer's or a stroke or something is not balanced with my diet (I am a vegetarian) and I'm doing irreversible damage and now my life is ruined. I have also been thinking about how fast my past childhood and past life has went by and keep thinking that what's going on now doesn't matter because before I know it in a flash I will be an old man who wasted his life away if that makes sense. To put it better I imagine it's like I'm going to "warp" forward in time and skip this part of my life because my memory is "bad" (or at least I think) and anything I do now doesn't matter. It's like because I don't have full control of my life I think nothing matters. I don't know what's going on. I feel like I'm thinking like a philosopher sometimes. Like I questions every single little thing throughout my day and a lot of it scares me because I realize things like I haven't gotten a job yet and I am 19. So that makes me feel like a failure even thought its because of my anxiety and I am working on that now and hoping to get amjob very soon. The of course I think about the short life and life has no meaning because it will be over before I even live itmssort of thought and it sends me into a bad anxiety attack. Then of course depression plays part in these deep thought trains at times. I feel so afraid of life. And afraid of judgement from others. I'm afraid of death and being alone. And my newest fear is loosing my memory. I am petrified of not having a good memory. I'm so scared I'm gonna loose my memory and its gonna make my life feel like dreams. Have you ever heard of how you always dream while sleeping but you don't remember them alot of the times? Well imagine over thinking about dreams before going to bed. Imagine right before you go to sleep you think I'm gonna dream tonight and it will be like it never happened tommorow. I'm going to experience This dream but at the same time I'm not. Now imagine that's my mindset. Thinking of what if I experience life like those dreams we never remember? What if I'm 19 now and trying to enjoy life get a nice job and car and friends and best my life on track but worrieng its all gonna be gone and done like I will loose my perception of time and I won't live life to the fullest and I will be dead before I know it. My whole life flashed before my eyes in real time. All of these horrifying what ifs cashing bad anxiety andi know most of these thoughts and what ifs are extremely irrational but they are there and my ocd looping thought process wont let me release them. I know mindfulness is my best friend but I have to know does anyone else experience such deep scary what ifs like this? If so how do you handle it? Should I fight this or just try to better understand and accept? I am so confused i feel like I am literally insane now. Anyways thanks for any insight in advanced.
  18. Hello again I am in the middle of a very rough time right now. I'm about to go to bed and I am thinking about lots of things. Stress of bills and trying to get a job and such as well as if you read in previous posts I was dropped off of my anti depressant medication. My anxiety and depression have been absolutely at their worst ever since the bad experience with weed in January. And since I was dropped off of my medicine I have had constant questioning of everything. Like constantly asking what could be wrong with me. If that little bit of numbness or pain could be a sign of a huge problem like a heart attack or stroke. My last several nights have been a horrible experience with bad sleep. So because of this horrible sleep I have had groggy slow anxiety filled days with dizziness (probably caused in part by other things) just always horrible and scary. I do find some happy times while watching TV or playing a game and my mind is off of it but then I will get the my life is ruined there is no point in going on thoughts and it causes worse anxiety and then that backs up that thought of my life being a constant anxious mess and it will never get better. I'm thinking I can't enjoy the simple things in life anymore like riding a motorcycle or driving without bad anxiety and depression knocking me down and making me feel like I would be best off doing you know what since I can't enjoy life. I know this isn't true. It's just depression getting the best off me but I am having more and more trouble every day not taking the s*****e thing to heart and thinking what if I do it? And than my anxiety gets even worse and so do the thoughts then I feel I actually may do it instead of what ifs and images flash of me just ending it. This is so hard for me to handle.how should I be handling this situation? Should I be fighting and thinking its not the right thing to do and you are not that bad off and if will get better and relax you aren't gonna do it? Even though that approach causes and internal clash of what ifs and its to late and stuff. I just say my therapist w few days ago and she was explaining about how it sounds like I have add and ocd and get trapped on these thought loops and can't get out. So I end up kind of playing into them and thinking this is it. And everyone is gonna miss me is guess. But my anxiety just gets worse thinking about it because I don't want this! What should I do I am literally petrified Im gonna do it. I am calling my phyc doc tomorrow to hopefully set up an appointment to get a new med started or something because coming off of that anti depressant has made me hit rock bottom. This is a horrible time for me. Pease let me know when these thoughts occur should one feed into them? If so how by accepting them or fighting and saying its the wrong thing to do? Or should they be ignored and try to out my mind somewhere else? I guess mindfulness is my best friends. Thanks for any input in advance.
  19. Hello everyone its been a while but I have been trying to cope as best as I can. I have a pretty bad habit off constantly worrying about my heart and senses. I have a hypersensitivity to almost anything around me but I am especially sensitive to changes in my heart beat or senses. Sometimes I have a numbness or tingling that's most likely accociated with anxiety but it really scares me because it brings up one of my biggest fears....... A stroke or heart attack. So I am constantly worrieng my heart beat is to fast or my heart will stop and then if I feel numbness or tingling I start to panic thinking it could be a stroke and start going through a anxious checklist of trying to find a difference between the sides of my body in feeling and if I am weaker on the left than the right and if I have trouble smiling ect. I just start loosing self control and have a panic attack. Another thing is I have been having lots of bad vertigo spells and feeling weak and dizzy and light and that's been causing anxiety as well. I start to think I'm having a stroke or ate something that made me sick or maybe I'm dehydrated. But I'm just having lots of trouble lately. I have also been struggling with some depression. Last time I talked to my therapist we set up a safety plan in case I start to feel to s*****al and the thoughts become overwhelming and I feel I will act on them. Another thing I noticed is I have gotten "worse" sense my physiatrist dropped me off my 20mg a day citalopram. Definitely feel worse depression especially after being dropped off of it. Is this normal? I know its probably just me over thinking what being off the med is doing but it did seem to help now that i have been off it for a month or so. So anyways sorry for the ramble but is this more than just bad anxiety? The constant worrieng and this weird check out I have where I check my facial expressions and feeling thinking I maybe having a stroke? One. Things can at least say is even though I do have some feelings of depression and s*****e I am still terrified of death. I'll post in the depression forum about this and how its going as well. Thanks for any input in advance and hope your day has been good!
  20. Hello all, I'd like to hear some second thoughts on some of the things I have been experiencing lately.As of around six months ago, I began having severe panic attacks daily, sometimes several times a day. After a particularly terrible day of panic, I started researching online what could have been wrong. Of course, what came up was a plethora of heart-related subjects. Since then, I haven't stopped worrying about my health and the possibility of illness, cardiovascular ones in particular.I haven't had as many panic attacks, but each day I get symptoms on their own such as heart palpitations, chest pain/funny feeling in chest, derealization, shortness of breath or hyperventilation, tightness in my throat, shakiness, dizziness, weird sensations in my tongue, hot flashes, or various other physical symptoms. Yesterday I was laying in bed (not feelings anxious), and suddenly the right side of my body went numb, and seconds later my heart beat increased; it's never been so fast and pounding before. Today, I awoke with a twinning feeling in my chest and a numb mouth. I've never felt numbness due to panic attacks before, so you can imagine how much I panicked when that happened.I have been to my doctor once or twice as well as a pulmanologist (before these last few 'stranger' panic attacks), but none could find anything wrong. I haven't been to a cardiologist due to a lack of money, time, and frankly I'm embarrassed of the possibility of it all being in my head. My doctor said she doesn't believe it's heart related (I'm only eighteen as well). I just can't stop this fear that I'm dying though. It seems all I do is obsess over my physical symptoms and look up possibilities on the Internet (Which is a terrible idea, I know.)Are these physical symptoms a sign of illness, or do they relate to hypochondria? Could these actually be panic attacks? Is it hypersensitivity? I'm just terrified that I'm dying all the time.
  21. Hello all I know I have been kind of making threads similar to one and other but I feel worse but better at the same time so I would like to just get it out and feel a little more comfortable. I've been suffering from bad anxiety all my life but sense this past January I had a horrible experience with marijuana that triggered severe anxiety and derealization. Following that was tons of panic attacks and episodes of feeling detached or like I was looking at reality through a TV or glass. Feeling like I'm pulled away from reality and everything seems like a dream and its sometimes so convincing that I will think is this really reality? Which as you can imagine gets very scary to think about. So the past few days into today these feelings of derealization/depersonalization have built up and today seems to be the worst. I truly do feel like everything is a dream. And its causing anxiety which is making my day a living heck. And on top of all this I have severe health related anxiety. If I read it I think I have it. Hypochondriac basically. Lately I noticed I have mild to moderate tinnitus from loud concerts and music as well ass head trauma as a child but lately I'm constantly thinking about it getting worse and driving me "insane" because I've read people supposedly loose of due to tinnitus not letting them ever hear silence. Stuff like that makes me really anxious through out my day. When I go to see my therapist we talk things through and it doesn't seem so bad but then I get home and start experiencing this again and I feel like crap again. Another thing that's been bothering me lately to is I have been noticing this really weird thing where when I get really anxious or panicked I seem to like dwell on sounds and images as memories that have happened and they like repeat because I'm dwelling so much on them. Here's and example I saw a loud car go by the other day. I was anxious while it happened and when I started really thinking about it I felt like I was replaying that car go by over and over like a daydream. Could see and hear it very vividly felt like I am loosing touch with reality when this happens. And altough I don't fully believe I'm loosing grip on reality with the way I'm thinking and experiencing life right now its hard to not second guess. And on top of all of this sometimes I feel depressed because I think that I'm never going to be able to live life like I used to again and that this is basically it for me. I'm just going to live life like a closed in anxious person and not enjoy life. I cant say I've never thought about the whole s*****e subject but I never actually believe in it I never feel its the right answer. To be honest when I think of it I get anxious and panic because I don't want to do that. And also when I think about not living life to the fullest and having fun I always counteract those thoughts by saying I will overcome this and live life like I want to. But anyways I'm sorry for the long long long explanation but wow does it feel good to let it out. Thanks for reading and any input is greatly appreciated.
  22. I have had a weird thing happen while anxious this past month, which I can only call a new anxiety symptom? Ugh...I feel it now. When I'm panicking or anxious in general, my veins will become very visible in my arms and hands and will throb with pain. This pain happens before my anxiety and can sometimes linger afterwards. The pain keeps me from sleeping, because I tend to have anxiety right before bed. Does anyone experience anxiety symptoms involving their veins? It's freaking me out. I'm trying not to start the downward spiral about it where I think I have a clot and I'm about to die.
  23. Hello all. I know I'm usually talking about anxiety or panic attacks but as of lately I've been worrying myself back into a depression. I have so many things I worry about such as what am I going do as a career? Will I be happy with the job I choose? What am I going to do when my parents pass? How long am I going to live? Am I living life to the full potential? And that's just the surface. At times I've been feeling like I have no way out and sometimes the s****dal thoughts pop in. Even though I know its not right and I'm not going to do it I just feel lonely and backed into a corner. Like ive lost my bright outlook on life. Is this depression creeping its way back? I haven't been saying much about it lately as I usually overcome it but sense I'm 18 going on 19 its like the whole world of responsibilities have come crashing down on me and i feel like it will be impossible to enjoy life like I did through childhood. I guess maybe I'm just dealing with normal adult life and kind of throwing daily stresses out of proportion? Anyways any input is greatly appreciated. Just not a great day I guess.
  24. So for the last month or so I have been feeling 50/50 depending on the day and have seen my physiatrist and counselor a few times to help with panic and anxiety. Last couple days I have been feeling very anxious. Lots of panic and anxiety especially when driving. For some reason when driving I guess its really "stimulating" for my anxiety with all the thinking and things going on at once so I kind of go of on trains of thought. Some times while driving I get pretty scared because I feel as if im taking to much attention off driving and gonna have an accident. Ive developed a few "new" fears that are making my life miserable as of lately. Now this may sound far fetched but I have this fear of loosing the ability to tell the difference between dreams and reality. Like if im out somewhere or driving I keep thinking What if im dreaming and this isn't real? or what if I loose my memory and forget about things and end up in an accident? Just weird anxiety panic provoking thoughts pop into my head at the most inconvenient times. Of course my other fear is that im still high. Ever sense I tried weed back in January of this year i have definitely changed. I keep feeling like i experience life differently like I see things more vividly but at the same time like "too" vividly like im sensitive to light now. I also feel like my senses have changed. Like slower reactions and maybe even hearing kinda dulled or im not feeling the way i used to and im "numb" from the pot. Or im still high and talking slow and averythings slow. Just lots of bad thoughts causing anxiety. Now even though these are almost constant thoughts im fighting with to prevent anxiety I don't think they are really valid as I do not think smoking pot for a few weeks could do that. I think its me overthinking the way im experiencing life with anxiety now. Like a loop of how I feel weird feelings caused by anxiety and then I overthink them as being threatening and have panic attacks ect. So what do you think? I also just a few days ago went up on my celexa/citalopram by 10mg which gave me some anxiety last time my phyc doctor had me try it. But does anyone else with anxiety have the like weird "separated" from reality feeling? Like being sucked into myself and "Detached" or something. And it seems like i see things with a weird depth perception and like I have kind of a sensitivity to light and things seem unreal or dreamlike sometimes in bright sunlight especially. Anyways sorry for rambling but it felt good. i did go for a 4 hour drive on a trip out of state today so that definitely is a step forward. Now most of these thoughts or fears/worries are just me overthinking things mainly. Because like usually im fine until i start to feel weird then i feed into it by saying omg i must be high or theres something wrong with me then bam full on panic attack. but if I avoid those thoughts im fine. Anyways again sorry for such a long post but it really feels good to get this out. Also my hearing may actually be damaged some as I have thoughout my life had lots of loud experiences without protection. From machinery to concerts and within the last year I have been doing caraudio a lot with REALLY loud bass. Like breaking windows in my car for a while loud. Lets just say that system is no longer in my car its a lot smaller now. So yes my hearing is probably damaged (my dumb selfs fault) but it brings on anxiety because I start to think about how I did permanent damage. I mean I still hear very well (pass hearing test up to 17.5khz) but I have lots of ringing/dullness sometimes now. Anyways, Thanks for reading
  25. Hello all again. I really am sorry to sound like a "broken record" repeating myself but, im really starting to feel like im in a balance between controlling my anxiety and feeling like im loosing my mind. So lately the past few days haven't been as bad as they could be. Heck I was actually feeling pretty happy at points through the day today and yesterday. Heres the thing anytime I start to feel good and overpower the anxiety I just start thinking "bad" things and scare myself back to where I was. Like a few hours ago I was feeling pretty happy looking forward to the weekend and finished some jobs around my house. Then im lying in bed and I start thinking things like "am I really feeling right?" or a new though that's got me going the past few days is "Im 18 I don't have a job im not in school so what am I going to do with my life?" then the "you only live for so long" thought pops in and I just loose it. Like full on burning sensation shaking sweating panic attack. . Why does thinking of what I want to do with my life scare me so bad? I have a lot of different career paths im trying to choose but I keep thinking im gonna choose the wrong one and not be happy with my career down the road. These thoughts on top of the health related ones and me looping the thought has been making panic attacks pretty strong. So I can say I did have a decent day today as I was able to get out and do things but once I start thinking these thoughts that's it I just lost control and its scary. I keep thinking im gonna be like this all my life and not be able to get out and go places or anything. Like this weekend Im supposed to go enjoy some delayed 4th of july fireworks with my 9 year old nephew and I just keep thinking about how im gonna be out of my house for to long and have lots of anxiety because of my overthinking and stuff. Anyways Im trying to take control of anxiety instead of vise versa. I OWN my brain and right now Anxiety and Panic are just co-owners and im about to lay them off. Im just sick and tired of living my life like this. Anyways sorry for another long rant but it really feels good to let it out. Thanks for reading in advanced. Also missed my med today so I may be feeling something from that.