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jonathan123 last won the day on May 2

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About jonathan123

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    ......AC's very own Yoda.....

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  1. jonathan123

    On holiday and had another heart episode

    The thing that worries me is there’s nothing bad going on now. On holiday, feeling great. Nice and relaxed. So what’s to have an anxious episode about? Must be an actual heart issue. NO!!! It's not. What most people don't realise is that the unconscious part of the mind, the part to which we have no direct access, goes on working without our consciously being aware of it. It can throw up symptoms and feelings from memories we think we have long since forgotten. The feelings and emotions come up but not the memory that caused them. Psychotherapy is aimed at reviving those memories and dealing with them with reason. So many sufferers say 'but it came out of the blue. I was fine and for no reason that I can see I had a panic attack'. It may have been a sound, a smell, a voice calling, a wind in the trees, anything that would cause an unconscious memory recall with the emotions associated with that memory. Never be bluffed by this happening. Even when you are not anxious it will happen. Immediately you fear the worse, as you have done, then you are off on the fear/adrenaline/fear cycle. It's so easy to fall into that trap. Say to yourself when it happens, 'Oh well, here you are again, but this time I'm not falling for it. Do your worst, I'm not bothered', then go about what you are doing. The feelings may still be there but they won't matter. Don't spoil a good holiday with illusions.
  2. jonathan123

    Scared vision issue periphery

    The simple answer to eye problems in anxiety is tension! The eyes have a lot of small muscles that give us the power of vision. It they tense up, as they do if we are stressed, then all sorts of tricks may occur. In fact it's true to say that anyone with an anxiety problem will have some visual troubles, even though they may not always be apparent. Spots, wavy lines, flashes, peripheral distortion are all symptoms of anxiety and stress. If your eyes have been checked out and are OK then just accept that while you are stressed this phenomena will occur from time to time. Nothing to get upset about. 'Seeing' things that aren't there is also a problem and is not the hallucinations that some think they are.
  3. jonathan123

    Extrene fatigue

    Anxiety is draining. It takes a lot of energy to cope with worry and fear. Nervous exhaustion is what it's called. I doubt if steroids would make you so tired but anxiety certainly will. Rest as much as you can but most importantly rest your mind. If your worries are specific then try and resolve them. If it's general anxiety it's more difficult to cope with. 'Free floating anxiety' will settle on anything, and what is normal will often seem wrong. Can you practise acceptance? Just allow it to happen without responding with fear at every little twinge or upset? It's the continual fear that leads to the symptoms you have. Take it easy for a while, if that's possible, and you will gradually regain strength, but only if you stop anticipating what MIGHT happen. You are having medication so you have seen a doctor. If any illness has been ruled out then the racing heart, (a classic anxiety symptom), and all the other feelings are anxiety. Fear and the feelings and emotions of anxiety never killed anyone, but they can make life miserable. Go slowly. Deep breaths when you feel symptoms. Have you had any counselling? Five years is a long time to be under stress so it's no wonder you are tired. You will be fine. Give it time.
  4. jonathan123

    Shivering bad

    YES!! The word 'perception' is really the key. It's how we perceive things. How we see things. If there is an accident and the police are involved they will take statements from people and everyone will have a different view. 'He was doing 50mph'. 'No, it was more like 30mph'!!! The same in anxiety. What to us may be a frightening sight to others may just be disturbing. Our perception of any unwanted or even mildly frightening event can be so exaggerated. When in the throes of GAD I saw two guys in a pub having a heated argument. It upset me for days. Now to a so called 'normal' person it may sound ridiculous. My wife forgot about as soon as we left the pub, but I could not let it go. It made a deep impression because I was SENSITISED at the time. Sensitisation can produce all sorts of strange effects on the mind and on the body. But none of them have any real significance. It's all smoke and mirrors conjured up by our friend Mr. Anxiety. He's good at it, in fact a passed master. IF WE BELIEVE HIM and fall for his fantasies. Call his bluff! When he says you are sick shout NO I'M NOT!!!! Don't tolerate any nonsenses from him. The ego, which he is, will try all sorts of tricks so always be aware and on your guard against negative thinking.
  5. jonathan123

    Forgetting things.

    So have any of you ever been totally unable to recall saying something just minutes after saying it? It really freaks me out. I mean losing my train of thought and the like doesn't bother me, but this does. In a recent post I said that we suffer from exaggeration in anxiety. Now it's a fact that everyone, at some time, especially when they are tired, gets forgetful. So called 'normal' people do. So do I often. So do many of my family and friends. But they shrug it off as part of the human condition. Another thing to take into account is that we are often overloaded with information. Especially if you Google! You have a tired mind from flogging yourself with anxiety so that it's perfectly normal to be forgetful. This morning in the shower I could remember if I had washed my hair or not. Yeah!!! WELL. Could I remember where I left my mobile?? No way. I hunted high and low and it was in the car all the time. I PUT IT THERE but did not remember until after that I had. See what I mean? It happens to all of us but dementia, NO WAY!!!! The more you worry and fret over it the more forgetful you will get because you make yourself more tired. Take a break and take it easy. You will be fine and when you are less tired and anxious your memory will return as normal. Thanks Haha Confused Sad
  6. jonathan123

    Shivering bad

    And most people, even so called 'normal' people, tremble when in a fearful state. It's still normal. OUR problem is exaggeration. Everything we have in anxiety is exaggerated. Most people feel anxious when awaiting test results. WE don't just feel anxious, WE panic. Most people would be apprehensive if a loved one is ill. WE get over wrought and upset. It's all a question of degree. The realisation, in other words the understanding of what is happening, can go a long way to helping. Can you accept, for the time being, that what you are going through is self inflicted. No 'thing' is trying to get at you. No monster waiting to jump on you. It's all a grossly exaggerated response to fear, the real bogey. Anxiety s always fear based and the result of inner conflict. You are fighting yourself. Try to practise acceptance. I know only too well how difficult this can be but, to me, it does work but takes time.
  7. jonathan123

    Icy feeling on chest

    It crossed my mind in the midst of the panic, to ride it out, You know actually that's a very good analogy. If a cowboy wants to break a stubborn horse he will get on it and 'ride it out'. If he gets thrown he must get back on again and stay on until the horse learns it has been beaten. Anxiety is like a bucking bronco. It will have it's way if you let it, but it has to be tamed and shawn who is master. Who is master in your mental household Nutmeg. YOU or 'IT'.? Who has the most strength? Who, (and this is important), has the most intelligence? If you can objectify anxiety, see it as something outside yourself that is not apart of you but something that has been laid on you by life, then you cease to identify with it. The big danger in anxiety is that we come to identify with it. WE become anxiety. It takes over if we allow it. Who is WE? YOU are NOT your anxiety. It is not never was and never will be part of you. But it's a pretty powerful force and it takes courage and resolution not to identify with it. Anxiety is common and universal. It can be used for good or ill depending on your attitude to it. You can, surprisingly enough, have positive anxiety where your fear leads to action which leads to good on your own or another's behalf. It's the negative variety we have to deal with here. So get back on the wild horse and tame him. YOU are boss, not him. OK??
  8. jonathan123

    Worried about Lewy Body Dementia.

    Have you heard of 'Daydreaming'? Carl Jung, that great 20th century psychotherapist, suggested that his patients be encouraged to daydream. He would then analyse the dreams as he would have a night dream during sleep. I doubt there is not one of us who has not dozed off during the day and had pictures in the mind about something different to where we actually were. I have and do often. Bobnat is right. It is normal. The explanation given there is spot on. Hallucinations are different to imaginings, which you had, Very different.
  9. jonathan123

    Icy feeling on chest

    Why would I still freak out about it? Why can’t it just accept it? Because reason could not enter the picture soon enough. During a panic attack, which is what you had, any sort of reason or common sense goes out the window. YOU become panic embodied. There is only panic, nothing else. Someone may be able to calm you down, but your immediate reaction is to panic because you are panicking. All the symptoms you describe are exaggerated anxiety. Now what happens when you feel like that? You become afraid of what MIGHT happen and the apprehension brings on more fear. This tighten the circle of fear/adrenaline/fear until you are in a full blown panic attack. Now what I am about to say may seem strange but STOP trying to be free from 'IT'. STOP trying to control 'IT'. Let 'IT' come and do it's worse. OK? No? Any form of fear has its limits. There is a limit to the amount of adrenaline that can be secreted in one go, so panic will always die down. It will be exacerbated by more fear, but eventually it must stop. You will feel drained and exhausted, but the panic will cease. The secret is not to fight it or struggle with it. Go with it. Bend with the wind. Go with the flow. Give up trying to do anything about it. NOT give in, that's different and self defeating. After a time, and it takes time, you may still panic, but you will know what to do and IT WILL NO LONGER MATTER! Nothing is easy in anxiety. It can be hard work finding a way out of the maze, but it can be done if done with acceptance in your heart. Acceptance and love. You have to learn to love yourself, warts and all. You are not a failure or different from anyone else. We all have the ability to recover if we go about it in the right way and willingly. Take heart Nutmeg, you are in good company and we all are gunning for you. Thanks Haha Confused Sad
  10. jonathan123

    Shivering bad

    One of the most difficult things for us to accept is that ALL the symptoms of anxiety are NORMAL in the circumstances we create for them. When in a panic mode it's normal to feel your heart race. It's normal to be breathless. It's normal to want to rush to the toilet. It's a normal body response to danger. You are being prepared, by your primitive brain to run so everything is geared to that end. Your modern reasoning mind is in abeyance. It's swamped by the emotions caused by fear. Nothing in anxiety is easy, but understanding what is happening can help a lot, although it may not immediately relieve the symptoms. The facts are simple. Their application is difficult. The pains, aches, and symptoms that 'normal' people get cause fear. Fear produces adrenaline, the fear hormone. Adrenaline begins the process of preparing your body for the fight/flight syndrome. ALL the symptoms are anxiety related. (I'm assuming you have been checked out). But do we see and understand that. Oh no!! The nature of the beast, HA, is to panic before we can reason which 'triggers' all the symptoms over again, and so it goes on. The cycle of fear/symptoms/adrenaline/fear begins. It always passes and we always calm down, but unless we take some action it will recur.
  11. jonathan123

    Scared vision issue periphery

    Eyes can be badly affected by anxiety. When you realise that the eyes have millions of nerve endings you can see why. They are vulnerable to stress because all the small muscles can tense up thus causing vision problems. Seeing things that aren't there is a classic anxiety symptom. As are flashes, stars, spots etc, etc. You name it you can have it with anxiety. Twitching is due to a contraction of the small muscles in the eye, once again caused by stress. We are back once again to the fear/symptom/fear syndrome. The more you concentrate on it and fear it the more it will bother you. Eyes and ears can be affected. That's why we get dizzy and our hearing is often impaired. The ears, like the eyes, are very sensitive and tension can upset the balance. Honest, there is no end to the anxiety complexities that can arise once we get in the habit of fearful thinking. Once you have been checked out and found to be OK try and believe the experts. Self diagnosis in nervous illness is dangerous.
  12. jonathan123

    Still very afraid

    I have said this many times and it still remains true. ANXIETY CAN MIMIC ANY KNOWN DISEASE once it's in the mind. You have been Googling, a very big mistake, and have planted in your mind the seeds of your own fear. Once the mind is so stimulated to look for problems it will, and having the seeds of doubt already there, off you go with full blown HA. You are no exception. We all do it unless we realise it's happening and make some effort to correct it. I really don't see much of a future for me, I doubt very much I'll still be around 6 months from now. That's the negative thinking that is keeping you as you are. It's a fearful thought and fear induces more adrenaline and so more symptoms. You are doing this to yourself. Now I'm not suggesting you can ignore the symptoms. Obviously they are there and are real. But unless you understand fully the mind/body connection they will continue to frighten you adding more fear. But can you accept them for what they are? Nothing more than the mind sending erroneous messages based on feelings only. After May 8th come back and tell me I was right. I have seen your scenario played out so many times that it's no longer a surprise to me. Anxiety is a very powerful force and can lead you up many dark alleys until you assert your authority and see it for what it is. Smoke and mirrors. And don't think I have no idea of what it's like!!! I HAVE!!!! Best wishes.
  13. jonathan123

    Having a bad day

    It's impossible for us guys to understand the erratic things that go on every month with you ladies, but what I can do is give you a reassuring hug, if you will permit a guy to do that. Well, here's one anyway. !!!!
  14. jonathan123

    I hate that I can’t think normal

    Yes Nutmeg. We hear this and that and read this and that and ideas get planted in the mind so that at the slightest 'trigger' off they go. 'What ifs' begin to circulate around the mind. You have seen or heard the word 'arrhythmia' although you have no real idea what it means or any of the real symptoms. It takes a trained medical person to do that. Plus i just remembered that a lady said her dad felt extremely cold before his heart attack that he was shivering bad before it hit. See what I mean? Was it a cold day before his heart attack? Was he in a cold room? I have not heard of anyone being cold before a heart attack, but I am not a doctor so have no authority to comment. It's our minds that create problems, but WE allow them to run away with us. There is a part of the mind that can reason, and that part knows it's all smoke and mirrors. But the primitive part; the cave man part, says 'danger' and we go into the danger mode which swamps out the reason part. Adrenaline flows and all reason goes out the window. You want to run from 'IT' or fight 'IT' but can't do either in modern life, so all the fear turns inward and you suffer anxiety. Try and accept how you feel without feeling so much fear. I know, very difficult. But at the root of all anxiety is fear. Ask yourself what you are really afraid of and see if there is any real evidence for the fear. Thanks Haha Confused Sad
  15. jonathan123

    Still worried about a brain tumour

    Something is going on and I'm terrified Yes, something is going on alright. Anxiety!!!! Now let's look at your post. Lucid and the spelling is correct and you explain yourself well. OK? Do you honestly think that if you had anything seriously wrong you could come on here and talk as you do? ALL the symptoms you describe are absolutely typical of an anxiety state. The key lies in the word 'terrified'. To be terrified is to be in an abject state of fear. Fear makes the adrenaline flow like crazy, and it makes the symptoms of which you complain ten times worse. Have you any medication you can take to give you a calm respite so you can think more clearly and try and reason things out? I know, difficult, but you have to try and break the fear/adrenaline/fear cycle. I think you have said that you have had medical checks in the past. If the symptoms still worry you get some more reassurance. But calm acceptance is the real answer rather than fighting 'IT'.