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Nutmegbella last won the day on May 13

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About Nutmegbella

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  1. Nutmegbella

    This just happened

    Hey guys sorry for finally getting back to this. I am doing good. My anxiety has been more manageable these last few days and I’ve just been happy with that and enjoying it. I’ve felt multiple sensations that did cause somewhat of an initial reaction but then I just took a deep breath let it out slow and distracted myself. But here’s the thing I know I should just be happy with this but I am thinking why is it more easy right now is it just because the anxiety has calmed down a bit or did that thinking process really help? Does that make sense? @jlmwz316 Thanks to family we found a place that will be able to help me get some counseling, aside from the whole imsurance thing when I was in counseling i had issues finding a therapist that knew about health anxiety, as in how to help me out. And this place has a specific specialized area in hypochondria! I was really happy to see that. I’ve got an appointment for August. So that’s looking up.
  2. Nutmegbella

    This just happened

    I woke up to my heart racing pounding so hard. Maybe I slept on my arm and it caused it to twitch really bad. My left arm was super tingling when I was walking around freaking out about my heart. I couldn’t breath. I told my husband to call 911 he just ignored me and said it was a panic attack. This scared me. What kind of reaction is that? Desensitized because if my anxiety? What if this is a true emergency and he’s here saying “nah you’re fine!”. i then flopped down on the bed laid down on my back and my upper back pulsed really bad with pain. It went up into my head the pulsing of pain. Which then caused a headache. My flanks and lower back also pulsed with pain. And right now I am on the edge thinking its going to happen again. The headache lasted a few minutes. Wth just happened? It’s left me feeling weak. Husband is insisting I’m fine. But what if I am not?
  3. Nutmegbella

    Something new

    Okay finally had a good day with the neck and shoulder thing. I did wake up with pain but then later I took a nap in a position I haven’t been able to sleep in for the last few weeks and I woke up better. Still a little pain when I make sudden movements. But a whole lot better. And now I’m struggling with something new. I’m here dealing with: wheezing chest crackling nose drainage suffocation feeling i take a deep breath and I get side stitch pain. ive been feeling dizzy. Yesterday was bad. We went to the store and I just felt dizzy. At first I thought it was cause of the neck pain but I continued to feel dizzy today. Also I came up the stairs and I went to lay down and I had a hard time catching my breath followed by and extreme heaviness in my chest.What if I have pneumonia? Or my lungs are feeling up with water or blood. Would I know that by now? My throat feels like I’m about to get sick. I had been choking a lot these last few days. So aspiration pneumonia is a fear. But i can’t help think something sinister because of how my lungs feel. Guys I’m tired of the invasive thoughts. I want to retrain my mind sooo bad. Yet I’m here and I’m with all these thoughts. That make everything seeem so real and seem like they can truly be happening. Right at this moment want to run to the hospital because I feel like I won’t wake up in the morning. That I’m going to have a rapid infectionrun through my body that’s going to rob me from my kids. Earlier today I went to check on my garden and i smelled a sulfur smell and it turned out my husband didn’t dump out the fireworks we did. We had put them in water to soak and we forgot about it. Will I went to throw it out and the filthy water got onto me. I tried washing it off. But then. Later on in the day I saw that I had a Cut where the water landed becaus it was stinging. So yeah I fear that water could of made me rapidlysick. Aaaaaaaa this is really annoying. Why ?!
  4. Nutmegbella

    Night sweats

    Hey it happened to me the other night I felt the room a lil warm but not bad. I fell asleep with no covers. I had a tank and shorts. And my tank was drenched in sweat. I know when I woke up I felt the room it was just right not cold nor warm. In between. It it’s happens I guess.
  5. Nutmegbella

    Heart Worries

    I get instant lightheadedness with palpitations. Sometimes it feels like it’s at the same time. Yet they say it’s normal. I’ve had a 5 day monitor and they too caught a bunch of episodes (100) and it was still considered normal. Sorry you are going through these tough times hopefully things get better for you guys.
  6. Nutmegbella

    Aahhh the thoughts

    I’m battling dumb thoughts. For those who haven’t read some of my posts. I recently suffered an injury to my neck and upper back. From either sleeping oddly in the floor or my husband had cracked my upper back and I felt a pop in my throat/neck. So from the pop a i heard is were the dumb thoughts are focused on. My thoughts? That maybe that pop is a vein that got damaged and is probably forming a huge aneurysm. The symptoms I’m feeling: neck pain that shoots down my spine or to my arms when I move my head. trouble swallowing. at times I do feel dizzy. i have had a few dork moments. I was shaving and i was about to put the razor in my mouth, i couldn’t remember which drawers are were mine. at times it feels like my movements are numb or smooth it’s and odd sensation. Tingling going down my arms, spine and left side of the head and face. pain in my left shoulder. right now I felt pain under my jaw. It felt like something was ballooning in there and pain was bad. when I yawn or burp it hurts my neck. bending down to pick up things it hurts any sudden movements to my spine it hurts my neck. When i lay on my back I feel like i can’t breath. it feels like I’m not breathing but I am but maybe that’s cause it gets hot and humid. or I can’t carch my breath. out of the blue twinges of pain. Chest pains. right now I feel like me moving isn’t coming from me. If that makes sense? I get this fear that my vagus nerve is getting irritated and well I had read before that that controls your heart rate and I’m afraid the irritation will send me into an arrhythmia. Another fear is that since I’m afraid of moving my neck a lot I’ll get a clot. At times it’s like my hearing goes. Am i starting to pass out? I am being very illogical right? Last two nights I haven’t slept right. So I don’t know if it’s just intensified the anxiety, or just the pain is what making my thoughts run. Earlier while suffering some of the invasive thoughts I was listening to The Anxiety Guy and it helped. Like yes give yourself time to analyze and see that you are being illogical. But I’ve tried I didn’t want to post this. But holy cow I am looking for assurance, I know that’s bad. I shouldn’t be feeding this thing. But I am still here writing this. I am sorry. And thank you for your time if you do finish reading this. I guess what I want to know is having the symptoms above what would you do? If you didn’t have insurance? And you don’t want to be a financial burden.
  7. Nutmegbella

    Dealing with a loss

    That’s great. What a great way to keep his memory going. What kind of music did you guys produce?
  8. Nutmegbella

    Dealing with a loss

    Sorry for your loss. The best thing that helps is thinking of all the good times. Talk about it.
  9. Nutmegbella

    Really just a little bit of everything.

    @Holls yeah my head is stubborn gets stuck in the loop hard to budge out of it. But that’s another great tip. Asking my self “hey since when are you a doctor?!”, cause yes i have to stop trying to self diagnose. How many times did I think A, B, or C and yet I am here. Cause it was all just simply not true. Yes I have 4 lil ones, and I try to hide it. There are days were it really does show through. And they get curious and I try to explain. My oldest 13 yr old, she suffers from white coat syndrome, and I just tell her it’s like the attacks she gets when at the doctors and she teared up and asked “... you go through that everyday?” Breaks my heart I don’t want her to feel bad for me. I do the websites and I have books on it and workbooks. One of the workbooks being what my old therapist recommended me. And yet I am at ground zero. I really need to push it for my kids. It’s one thing my husband tell me learn to accept it, and ride the panic attack. Why let it defeat you? Yet I’m here not budging. Does this make me a selfish person. Yes and it bugs me like you wouldn’t believe.
  10. Nutmegbella

    Severe heaviness

    I’m alive. @BeeDot sorry you get these too. And that’s actually a perfect description on how it feels, a lead apron. Yes we certainly are still here. These panic attacks are very intense. @Angelica Schuyler Thank you, yeah they feel like death is knocking on your door step. The insurance thing gets me mad. You have no idea how we applied at our work, looked for private and we just get rejected and they don’t tell us why. But exactly 24 hours later. I’m struggling again. My lips are numb. I feel like I’m not breathing. I had severe neck pain all day yesterday it didn’t help that I had to prepare a big dinner for the 4th of July. I had my head looking down to chop and cook and at one point I did feel an extreme heavy feeling on my throat. Which made me feel like I couldn’t breath. Which then (hello illogical thought??) had my thoughts racing that what if this neck issue is indeed a bone fracture or break and what if scar tissue grows to a point it affects something like my throat or airway or vagus nerve or something like pinch a major artery. Then it’s a slow painful way to go. Tonight I used a memory foam pillow and there’s no constant pain. Just pain when I move my head. Now if it were a broken bone I wouldn’t get relief right? Ugh my internal battles.
  11. Nutmegbella

    Severe heaviness

    this is stupid that I can’t get insured. Any hospital visit will be a burden to our family.
  12. Nutmegbella

    Severe heaviness

    This can’t be a panic attack.
  13. Nutmegbella

    Severe heaviness

    Breathing feels really tight through my nose and my ribs.
  14. Nutmegbella

    Severe heaviness

    Shoulder pain.
  15. Nutmegbella

    Severe heaviness

    I think I’m dying guys.... woke up to severe heaviness on my whole front of the body.